When did going for 'therapy' become a thing?

[Outofinspiration]

I have noticed increasingly on Instagram etc that more and more people (Instamums and the like) are posting about their 'therapy' sessions. How amazing they are, how everyone should go to therapy blah blah blah. And in real life in the last few weeks 2 of my friends have brought up something their 'therapist' said about this or that.

I thought therapy was an American thing? Is it just a posher, less 'NHS' version of counselling, or is it something different?

Does anyone here go for 'therapy'? Am I missing a trick, is this something I should be doing?!

I'd try it out. Why not?

OK, if I'm being totally honest (and I'm only talking about me here) ... It feels sort of 'self indulgdent'? I know there are issues (mainly self esteem, over analysing and what is probably commonly known as 'anxiety') that would probably be improved with some sort of therapy/counselling and I also went through a very difficult time recently with both work related stuff and illness. But... I'm OK. I'm happy enough, I can get on with my life ok, i have great family and friends. Yes, there are lots of things I would like to change, but it's not essential that I go, and it's definitely not worth spending upwards of £50 a week of family money, when it's not totally necessary?

Maybe I'm then projecting the 'self indulgent' thing onto others that I see doing it?

Do you feel uncomfortable talking about mental health op? Do you feel a bit eyerolly when people are open about their mental health problems? Surely talking about this publicly can only reduce stigma?

I've had talking therapy on the NHS, I'd still be getting it now if I could get unlimited sessions or could afford to go private as what you get on the NHS is really just a bandaid

This is my issue in a nutshell.

Try it out is around what, £50 a time? It’s really expensive, and I do believe there is a vested interest from some quarters in ensuring we all believe that we all need or would benefit from it.

There are many types of therapy/counselling:
Person centred (Rogerian)
Psychoanalysis
CBT
Solution focused
Play therapy
DBT
EMDR for PTSD
A mix of all of the above
To name but a few.
A good therapist will know which approach to take, and recognise their own limitations.
Where people would have once sucked it up, and just got on, even to their detriment, we recognise now that early intervention, and appropriate talking therapies can help with a multitude of issues. This saves the NHS money (fewer people using substances to self medicate, presenting with serious untreated MH issues) and allows people to live happier lives.

I think therapy can be great but sometimes people rush to assume they will need it the moment something bad/difficult happens, when most of the time talking to friends and family is sufficient.

But if it doesn't help, then by all means try therapy.

As a generalisation, professional counsellor training takes up to 5 years and is usually diploma or degree level, whereas most therapists have a post-graduate qualification (at least a Masters) and their training can be seen as more academic.
Creative Art therapy (music, drama, art, dance) is sometimes available on the NHS. There is no doubt therapy is effective for many.

Have suicide rates gone down as therapy has gone up?

Suicide rates have been falling in this country since the early 80s. There's probably many other factors besides accessibility of therapy that play a part in this.

OP self refer to www.england.nhs.uk › adults › iapt
Web results
NHS England » Adult Improving Access to Psychological Therapies programme

It's free and they'll say if you're not severe enough.

@Outofinspiration - Don't discount the thousands and thousands of people who go to counselling and therapy quietly, with no mention of it on social media at all. Their nearest and dearest may not know about it either.

Often, talking about "how amazing" therapy is, is actually a tactic to avoid the confrontation with pain.

So much better to go to social media and compensate for a gnawing, ever-present sense of emptiness inside.

So much better to get Likes that then validate the illusion that you're actually doing something - at least they will be a temporary 'fix'; at least for a moment you can lie to yourself that you're really making progress, while being bolstered by your audience who then validate that sense of progress.

But, actually, therapy and counselling can be really fucking hard. In fact, if therapy isn't hard at some points, then it's not working. Therapy is there to break things open - including you - and the therapist's role is to contain you when that happens. Therapy can feel chaotic at times; and I know that I have often found myself feeling lost and without a map. And that's when it's going right!

It isn't always about pain. But pain is part of the problem, part of the process, and part of the solution too. It's hard to stay with pain. I certainly find it too hard at times. I can understand why a quick visit to Insta to extol the virtues of therapy after a particularly awful session might just stave off the existential angst.

That’s due to a myriad of factors, though, and at the price counselling stands at I’m not so sure it’s a contributory factor.

www.nhs.uk/Service-Search/Psychological%20therapies%20(IAPT)/LocationSearch/10008

I'd say the counsellors say it's the same, and the psychotherapists are outraged, FiveAcorns

Neither counsellor or psychotherapist are reserved titles so really anyone can call themselves either one - the distinction is in many ways artificial because there’s no specific training that denotes one from the other. So someone with a year of diploma training can call themselves a therapist, as could someone with 10 years professional training and extensive personal therapy. I know which bracket I fall into and would choose a therapist with a similar level of training.

In terms of it being more prevalent - I think there are a few forces at play. Yes there’s greater awareness of mental ill health which can only be a good thing, but I also think that normal human experience/emotion tends to be pathologised eg grief following a bereavement, or anxiety in the face of significant change or adversity. I think we’ve lost sight a bit of the range and depth of human emotion in response to life.

Personally I think therapy is a fantastic vehicle for personal development as well as for recovery in mental illness but not everyone needs or wants it.

I understand the 'self-indulgent' thing - but I think some of that comes from a place which wants to downplay whatever other part of you is in pain or has problems that you want to sort out. Plus there this whole stiff upper lip nonsense, that talking about your problems doesn't help etc... That's changing now but it's still deeply engrained in our culture.

And to the pp who said they'd love a session at the end of the week to offload and feel calm afterwards... it can actually leave you feeling really drained and shit afterwards as you're dragging out a lot of repressed stuff . It helps in the long run though.

Wow @AFistfulofDolores1 that is a very interesting post!

Counselling and therapy at not the same thing

The qualifications to be a counsellor are different to being a therapist...

Therapy can cover many different types of approaches and treatments.

You can do a short very part time course and get a certificate in counselling... it tends to be more reflective listening.

Try it out is around what, £50 a time? It’s really expensive

I'm not saying it's not, and clearly private therapy is not affordable for many/most.

I was lucky enough to be able to access therapy when I needed it. My marriage was in severe trouble and my career was in ruins, my relationship with my family was very troubled, and I didn't feel I could share any of it with my friends. Therapy changed everything for me. It changed who I am as a person. It changed how I see, well, everything. And my marriage is stronger now than it's ever been, I've retrained and am doing well on a different career path, and feel very differently about my family.
So yeah, therapy was very, very expensive, but in terms of earnings in my new career it has more than paid for itself, and the other stuff is priceless.

But if you don't have a problem to work on, you don't need therapy.

Been in psychotherapy for 2 years.

Therapist now treats me at a hugely reduced rate as am LP on low income but we’d started work when I had joint income of 100k (and paying £120 per hour).

People I know IRL know I’m in therapy as I believe strongly that normalising mental health and talking about how we care for our MH, in the same way we talk about an asthma check at the GP or a scale and polish at the dentist- is an important thing to do.

All I know is it is marvellous, I couldn't afford it normally so went to a community counselling service where I paid £1 for every £1000 I earned after tax, which wasn't much for me.

I was brave and honest and came out stronger. Lots of grieving too, as once you've turned a page, you can't unread it.

I completely agree with the feeling that @outofinspiration has about “therapy” as the new “in” thing...in the respect that it’s become insta-taggable and I suspect that several of the posters who advocate letting it all hang out now would probably have shrunk from such conversations in the past.

However I definitely disagree with you in that it’s self indulgent. Unless you have an absolute saint of a BFF or perfect family members it can be hard to talk over and unpack the shit we all carry in our heads without worrying about causing offence/being stigmatised/feeling guilt for taking up their time.

Using a therapist is much more transactional and objective. As it’s their job you can let it all hang out in a way many can’t with their nearest and dearest.

I also think that anything that is done to preserve the sanctity of one’s mental health is vital, not only for oneself, but for the family, community, workplace, everyone.

If I could wave a magic wand and put everyone in therapy I would. Truly I think it would make the world a more even handed place.

I very much agree with @fistful - therapy is and should be hard work, it’s not just a chat through your week with someone impartial, it’s about challenging yourself to understand yourself better, to face your own light and shade and come to a place of acceptance or change. My time in therapy represents the most vulnerable, soul searching, heart searing work I’ve ever done - and I’m better for it, but it was far from a debrief at the end of the working week.

I don't know so much about therapy but I know a lot of people with "life coaches" at present, is that a form of therapy? The people I know with said life coaches do tend to spring from one extreme to another in their lives so I do wonder if they are happy.

Counselling and therapy at not the same thing

I think that is why I have been a bit at people talking about their 'therapy' sessions, as if its actually a counselling session but they think 'counselling' doesn't sound glamorous enough. I know there are so many different types of therapy, and when people talk about 'going to therapy' as if its a generic thing it just makes me wonder what they are actually doing. Obvs no one is obliged to go into detail about what their therapy actually involves, but I think it's just the general use of 'therapy'.

I have been quite honest about my judgieness on this thread and the possibly reasons I am judgy about it and people have been really helpful about explaining differences between counselling and therapy.

NHS is normally CBT or short term counselling. Some trusts it will be say 6 weeks. It will obviously go on your NHS records.

Private (usually but not always psychotherapy) is longer term (usually at least a year) and more interested in your family dynamics and the reasons behind your feelings.

I wouldn't say that therapy for mental health and well-being is any more 'self-indulgent' than going to the gym for physical health and well-being to be honest.

I had CBT (13 sessions) self-referred through the NHS, free and didn't have to go via rubbish GP. It was for something very specific and had been recommended by someone. It helped with the specific problem a bit (it was complicated) but what I did get out of it was a really good set of here-and-now very calm coping mechanisms I was totally lacking before (and hadn't realised). It was like someone Rubix-cubed my head, and then showed me how to do it. I wish I'd done it years ago. The downside was that I felt very cheated that I didn't get to lie on a couch and off-load about my rubbish family, not even once, and I tried. Need a different kind of therapy for that apparently.