Loo seat etiquette

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AIBU to ask my OH to put the loo seat down after he has been for a wee? Both my sons put the loo seat down (both parts) after every use. There are three girls in the family and we all put the loo seat down (and are becoming a slightly frustrated at the one member of the family that doesn't.

I've asked very nicely a few times and been told that it's something he's done well in excess of 4 decades and by asking more than a few times (subject been brought up over the last few years, perhaps once every few months) that I'm nagging.

Seat leaver upperer puts seat down when goes for a poop!

AIBU?

Ugh hate it! Even my son always puts it down (except the times he forgets to put it up 😬)!

This is a pet hate of mine. DH used to be awful at leaving it up, but has thankfully improved with age and doesn't forget often now.

I don't recall my Dad ever leaving it up.

Lid goes down before flushing here so the germs/spray don't come flying out when you flush. Isn't that just basic toilet hygiene?

If he really wants to break the habit, write it on the bottom of the loo seat. Then he is forced to remember.. or not.

@Treaclesweet....not so sure he wants to break the habit.

Men can be pigs at times. At least DP doesn't go for a poo in the middle of the night, then returns to bed without pants, part his bum cheeks and slides up and down the bed leaving abstract art.

I have honestly never understood this argument. Loos have lids. Lid gets closed before flushing, stays down until next use. Doesn't matter who used it last, it's left in the same way by everyone (including the DC).

He should put it down. End.of.story.

So, 3 males in the house but they have to put the seat down for 1 female? How about you stop putting it down and leave it up for the guys?

DH has tried the leave the seat up argument after I complained for the umteen squillionth time that one of the DSs had peed over the seat again. I pointed out that all 4 members of the household need to sit on a toilet seat at some point without the risk of a soaking. I never need to use it with the seat up so shouldn't have to mess around with the seat to positions that I do not use.

If you don't close the lid, all the joy of the household gets sucked down the loo.

True fact.

Yabu for calling it poop. When did we start using poop anyway. What’s wrong with poo? Why the extra letter

I find soft close lids are the solution. A light touch and they close rather than having to grab hold.

The only time it really bugs me is in the night when i’m half asleep and it’s dark. Nothing worse than the shock of plonking your bum down on bare china and falling in. Mind it happens rarely now, i don’t think dh likes being woken by the screams!

I remember being so pleased that my husband never left the seat up when we first lived together. Then I realised that he never actually lifted it, just pee'd all over the seat and gave it a quick wipe 🤢 so lazy

I have trained my DH to put the lid and seat down but my DB, who lives alone, always leaves his seat and lid up. He says maybe I am wrong to put it down so why can't I leave it up as he does. I see his point tbh (although I ignore it ).

Does he like technology? If so, why not buy a soft close toilet seat. Perhaps he'll find it interesting.

If you mean that everyone puts the lid down then yanbu. If you expect men to lift the seat, piss and then put the seat down then yabu. There's no good argument for that.

I have honestly never understood this argument. Loos have lids. Lid gets closed before flushing, stays down until next use. Doesn't matter who used it last, it's left in the same way by everyone (including the DC).

^This

I never understand why seat down is seen as the right way rather than seat up. Is it because women are seen as the homemakers and domestic arbiters so whatever suits them best becomes the rule. Perhaps I’ll just give myself a

Meh, I don't care. He uses it one way, I use it another. Have never much understood why everyone thinks he should leave it ready for me but I shouldn't leave it ready for him.

Seat AND lid down please.

We have a house rule that everyone sits down on the toilet, including for wees. Means everyone keeps the seat down and it never goes on the floor or seat.

I am a bit puzzled why more Mum's don't potty train their sons this way and am very glad MIL did (or that DH just likes a sit down!).

We have a house rule that everyone sits down on the toilet, including for wees

You have a house rule on how to pee

Having read the posts about training husbands I’ve taken the advice onboard and I’m in the process of training DW and DD to pee standing up!

Seat and lid down in my house, you need to close the lid to flush so my would you put it back up again?

It's not about men v women - you have to put the lid down not just the seat.

I live with 3 adult sons and 1 husband. I can lower the seat myself. It takes no time at all. It's a non issue and not even worth wasting breath and energy on.