Children in waiting rooms

[BigRedLondonBus]

Dd has some regular hospital appointments at the moment but I have no child care so it means taking all 4 children to the hospital with me. It’s abit of a nightmare what age would it be acceptable to leave children in the waiting room whilst we have the actual appointment?

Lucky you @m0therofdragons but my GP practice, as well as many others, do not allow children (as opposed to teenagers) being left unaccompanied in the waiting room. So smear tests have to be scheduled during school time or when there's childcare or presumably, as a last resort, the child has to come in the room and stay on the other side of the curtain.

DuchessDarty does it? I haven't been to a GP or hospital in the UK in 12+ years, so I will absolutely believe you. Seems odd to me in clinic settings though. My GP and dentist give children over 10 or so the choice about whether they want a parent with them and I've been leaving siblings in waiting rooms from 5 or 6 years old, especially when taking older DD in. I live abroad though in a country where more competence is assumed.

Dc3 has waited outside waiting rooms and secondary school classrooms on parents evening since he was 5 without misbehaving.

Its quite worrying that hercule dosent see the difference between A@e and consultant waiting rooms.

I've left my kids for 20 years in waiting rooms from tne age of 7 well that's bloody irresponsible. Take them home with you at the end!!

It is possible to change appointment slots. I do it frequently if I rearrange one of DS's consultant appts I can be waiting 2-3 months for a new appt and I still can't guarantee what time it'll fall

Yes anothernotherone it does. Other posters on here have said the same.

I'm surprised it's odd to you, it's not that hard to think about why this would be. And it's not because the Uk is a country where "more competences is assumed."

Some of the reasons are because:

• as a previous poster said about her hospital, in the case of an emergency the hospital do not want to have to round up random children;
• if something did go wrong, the assumption could be that the adults "on duty", i.e. the receptionists, should have kept an eye out on the children and the hospital don't want to risk the liability insurance or a lawsuit;
• people massively take the piss and leave children who are too young or not quiet/irresponsible/ unable to read important signs/unable to speak English proficiently and so can't understand safety announcements and these children may disturb the other patients and staff or may need adult help, and then the staff have to see to them or find their parents;
• it is not the job of reception staff to oversea children either directly or implicitly.

my2bundles

I’m not sure why that would worry you.

@herculepoirot2 yes, the ladies... there are 3 lovely ladies who work on the front desk of the children's ward out patient dept. Is that an issue? We're a small acute hospital so maybe we are different to larger hospitals but our set up means a 7yo sitting reading or playing Lego isn't a massive issue.

Well you have not admitted that your description of what happens in a consultants waiting room was complEvelyn false. You where describing a@e to 2 are not comparable.

@DuchessDarty smears are done one day a week by the practice nurse. I also work full time in a hospital so struggle to get there in work hours.

Some of the reasons are because:
- as a previous poster said about her hospital, in the case of an emergency the hospital do not want to have to round up random children;
- if something did go wrong, the assumption could be that the adults "on duty", i.e. the receptionists, should have kept an eye out on the children and the hospital don't want to risk the liability insurance or a lawsuit;
- people massively take the piss and leave children who are too young or not quiet/irresponsible/ unable to read important signs/unable to speak English proficiently and so can't understand safety announcements and these children may disturb the other patients and staff or may need adult help, and then the staff have to see to them or find their parents;
- it is not the job of reception staff to oversea children either directly or implicitly.
All of the above.

I'm sure most well behaved 8 year olds would be more than capable of sitting quietly for 10 minutes without being a bother to anyone. They're also probably safe doing that so I'm not sure the boogyman arguments work here.

However, policies are made on the basis of the smooth running of the hospital and it's not the job of other staff to informally mind the kids.

I think you'll just have to take them in with you OK or maybe see if you can arrange a play date for one of them to make it easier.

@m0therofdragons I repeat, you are lucky
There are plenty of mothers who work full time and struggle to get to the GP's on a certain day per week during work hours but don't have the option to leave their children in the waiting room. So they have to work round it. e.g. by asking if they can leave an hour earlier and making up the time, or by getting their smear tests done at a sexual health clinic with out of office hours during the night-time while their partner looks after the children.

Reality is, women with young children often don't have their smear tests. Glad my local gps are more accommodating than others.

GP's surgery is completely different to a large hospital though.

A GP's surgery is generally much smaller and there are less seriously ill people to consider in an emergency, my practice have allowed my kids to sit in the room with me behind the curtain during a smear test. Admittedly 10 yo DS chose to sit outside the room on the last occasion 😂

@m0therofdaughters they're presumably more accommodating because they've had less patients that take the piss, they aren't very busy, they haven't had an issue arise, they don't have strict insurance policies or they're lax on following insurance or legal procedures.

There's a big difference between children sitting in the examination room the other side of the curtain and in the waiting room. It's obviously a shame that some women with young children are missing out on their smear tests, but the harsh reality is that when we have children we have to make accommodations to the way we do things because we can't assume or rely on strangers watching our young children for 10 minutes. If they are willing to do so, that's a bonus, not an entitlement.

FEWER patients, not less

It’s more than a bloody shame that young women are missing out on smears because of their surgery’s inflexibility. It’s scandalous.

Probably around 8 but it depends on the kid and the setting - if there's a reception desk, deep inside the hospital and they know not to leave it is ok whereas a&e or somewhere open to the street no.

@DuchessDarty I'm trying to think of a situation when the staff would need to do anything for my 7yo. Maybe in the unlikely event of a nose bleed they may be required to hand them a tissue. If they needed me they would knock and come to me in the room I was in. You can see the door to the room I'm in from the waiting room.

That said, our children's op dept is on the top floor. I'm not sure I'd be happy leaving dd in the main op dept as it's a lot busier.

Overall it depends on the set up, the dc and the staff.

I think you’d be best to call in advance to check OP and even see if they can see you in a room that you will all fit.
I work in a heath care setting and in our clinic we don’t let children under 12 stay in the waiting area without an adult. That’s the policy and it’s not at the parents discretion.
Of course different places may have different policies but ours is in place for good reason.

@Alsohuman Before using emotive words like 'scandalous', do you have any actual statistics to prove that young women are missing out on smears because of their surgery's inflexibility?

The underlying reason why some surgeries and hospitals do not allow children under 10 (or older) to be left alone in the waiting room is down to legal and insurance regulations. And believe it or not, they're in the best interests of the staff. And the patients. A hospital's primary duty of care is to its patients. Not to the patient's children or young siblings. So while they can and do take responsibility for a patient's wellbeing and safety, they can't do so for the patient's children or siblings - that's the job of the children's parents or supervising adult.

@Duchess, it was you who said it was a shame young women were missing out on smears. I was responding. I’m assuming you have the evidence. I won’t bother with the silly face.

My DC2 is 8 and has very little screen time. He would be absolutely thrilled to be able to sit with an iPad in a waiting room and I can guarantee, would not move an inch 🤣

For me it would depend on how close the waiting room was to the consultation room. Sitting in the corridor outside a room would be fine. Sitting in a waiting area directly outside a consultation room also fine. Sitting in a waiting area where you have to go down a corridor into a separate bit to get to consulting room would be too far away though.

what age would it be acceptable to leave children in the waiting room whilst we have the actual appointment?

The acceptable age is the age which the hospital sees fit. Only they can tell you what this is, not us. It would be sensible to find this out in advance, if only to save yourself a wasted journey.

@Alsohuman actually it was M0therofdragons who said that mothers with young children - not 'young women' - were in reality missing out on smears because they couldn't leave their children in the waiting room. Out of respect I responded as if that was fact (because no doubt there is at least one young woman who is.) But personally I don't think it's scandalous. There are ways round it, even if it's bringing the child into the room with you.