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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is this mean or am I in the right?

72 replies

lastqueenofscotland · 24/05/2019 07:31

I am not really a dog person, I don’t like the mess or the smell and I’m mildly allergic to most things with fur.
My friends is off on a very lavish holiday and said she could only afford about half a week of the dog being with a sitter Confused
She asked if I would have the dog for 3 nights this week, and then her new boyfriend would have her for the rest of the week until she goes back.
I agreed on the understanding that friend knew I don’t really like “pets” so while the dog would be walked, fed, watered and played with i was not down for things like having it sleep on my bed (which she requested Confused) or letting it on my sofa.

She texted last night that her boyfriend is actually away too so she’ll just pick her up off me Friday next week.

Aibu to absolutely fucking not?! She sorts someone else to collect her as per our agreement?!

OP posts:
Winterfellismyhome · 24/05/2019 07:32

Yanbu shes taking the piss

MrsCasares · 24/05/2019 07:33

She’s a CF. Text back you can’t have the dog at all.

MinnieMountain · 24/05/2019 07:34

Absolutely. Or it's no to the whole arrangement.

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 24/05/2019 07:34

Mrs o have the dog now, she was meant to be collected this evening

OP posts:
sackrifice · 24/05/2019 07:34

Of course you are not in the wrong.

Soubriquet · 24/05/2019 07:35

I wouldn’t have the dog either

You can guarantee she will say some one will come and pick it up on xx and then no one turn up

PonderingPanda · 24/05/2019 07:36

She planned that all along. She is no friend. Message her back and say either the dog is collected as planned or you'll drop it off at the nearest kennels

Soubriquet · 24/05/2019 07:36

Cross post...

Eek. Urm. No idea now as she won’t arrange anyone

HotChocolateLover · 24/05/2019 07:37

Not your dog. Not your problem. She should have chosen a cheaper holiday if this was going to be a problem. What a CF!!

user1493413286 · 24/05/2019 07:39

You were nice to have it for 3 nights, anything more is taking the piss. I wouldn’t have agreed to the 3 nights; you factor those costs in when you plan a holiday

CalmdownJanet · 24/05/2019 07:41

No way, I'd text back "What a pain, I'm sure you'll manage to arrange something else, either way i have plans so the dog leaves tonight by 6, let me know who is collecting him"

sackrifice · 24/05/2019 07:41

Tell her she needs to do something as you are away all weekend yourself

Sophiesdog11 · 24/05/2019 07:44

Why did you agree to have it in first place? Are you always a mug? This is what kennels or similar are for.

If she couldn’t afford kennels she couldn’t afford a lavish holiday. It’s as simple as that. Kennels are part of the cost of a holiday!

We have had 2 long haul hols since we got our dog 5 yrs ago, one for 3 wks and one for a week in NYC. Both times the cost of kennels has just been factored into the holiday cost.

Text her back saying you suspect she planned this all along, she arranges for dog to be picked up as planned else you will take it to a rescue centre (kennels wouldn’t accept a dog without proof of vaccinations, inc kennel cough, which you won’t have). Then follow through and stop being a mug.

Cariadne · 24/05/2019 07:46

She’s a CF!

If you don’t want any drama then keep the dog but don’t ever do her another favour again.

If you want her to know how much of a CF she has been, tell her she has to make alternative arrangements for the dog or you will find a kennel which she will have to pay for.

No more favours for this friend!

Original poster
lastqueenofscotland · 24/05/2019 07:47

The dog is a rescue and goes into meltdown in kennels so it was with a sitter.
I didn’t really mind 3 nights especially as I have a Monday-Friday lodger who loves dogs so was happy to do a lot with her
. I do mind a week and a half!!!

OP posts:
Cariadne · 24/05/2019 07:48

Ah, just seen PPs about kennels needing certificates, that’s a pain. I don’t know if a rescue centre would take it either, tbh - they’re usually overstretched and it’s unfair to place the financial burden of caring for it on them. Do you know her parents or anyone like that? If so you could perhaps leave it with them if your friend refuses to make arrangements.

ChicCroissant · 24/05/2019 07:53

I would ask her to make arrangements to have the dog collected. This does sound as if it was planned. Drop the friend as well!

Fairenuff · 24/05/2019 07:54

Text her back and say you'll take it to RSPCA as an abandoned animal. She'll sort out something pretty sharpish.

overnightangel · 24/05/2019 07:55

Why can’t her boyfriend have it the whole time

SolitudeAtAltitude · 24/05/2019 07:57

Yeah, lots of talk but you will end up looking after this dog!

You've been had, she has played you

Rememberallball · 24/05/2019 08:01

Inwould message back saying you are not available having made plans for the BH weekend based on the dog being collected today and cannot change these plans at such short notice. She needs to organise someone to collect the dog at the time previously agreed otherwise they dog will have to be handed over to a rescue centre as being abandoned. Not pleasant for the dog p, or for you to have to threaten it, but she’s one massive CF (and probably hadn’t even asked the new boyfriend - she probably told him you’ve been in touch to say you can’t do the full 10 days as agreed and can he help out and he’s said a big fat NO!!)

AngelaJ18 · 24/05/2019 08:01

Hang on, she wanted you to let HER dog sleep on YOUR bed? That’s unreasonable right there! I dog sit for my mum on occasion, she has never requested that her dog gets to sleep with me. She’s being quite cheeky, particularly when she knows you don’t like dogs and you’re allergic.

So the dog has a meltdown in kennels, there are plenty of dog sitters around, she may struggle to find one at short notice but that is her problem not yours.

Ohkayyy · 24/05/2019 08:01

What a CF. I'd definitely tell her to sort something else out.

It's tough though because I couldn't actually leave the dog anywhere if it had no where else to go so I think she's hoping you'll have no choice.

Lost5stone · 24/05/2019 08:02

Why can’t her boyfriend have it the whole time boyfriend was probably away the whole time and they never really planned for him to have the dog.

I would say collect by 6pm or you will take it to a shelter as an abandoned animal

PhyllisPearce · 24/05/2019 08:02

Wow, your friend has stitched you up completely. I am 100% a dog person and will quite happily look after my friends dogs for weeks on end but only for the agreed time suitable for me
Your friend is a selfish cow, you don't mess around with a rescue dog who needs continuity and the security of familiar surroundings