Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is anyone else sitting here on this lovely summer evening thinking WTF and feeling fed up

39 replies

Sickofnamechanging · 23/05/2019 19:06

DD is training with her team. DS is "studying" at his girlfriend's. DH has gone to meet a friend for drinks.

I work from home and am now sitting here realising that I have no one to meet up with of a summer's evening for a drink or a walk.

I'm not moaning (honest!) just wondered if anyone else has ended up feeling quite isolated in life and not quite sure how they got there.

OP posts:
SummerHouse · 23/05/2019 19:16

Friendships can be found when least expected. Your gang or person could be just around the corner. In the meantime be open to it and try and enjoy the positive. I.e. lovely evening with no one hassling you. I would go out for a walk anyway.

nc100 · 23/05/2019 19:19

I'd go for a walk to the pub with my book and sit in the beer garden. You might strike up a conversation with someone!

CaptainMarvellous · 23/05/2019 19:22

I had a lousy afternoon with 2 of my DC yesterday and my DH suggested I go out for a break. It occurred to me that I had no one other than him and my mum to talk to about it (and my mum is off on a 2 month holiday this weekend). I wonder where all my friendships have gone

WhenIsTheEasyBit · 23/05/2019 19:26

Yup. Work with unsociable folk and spread across many sites, so no real bonds there. Some lovely old friends, who I could rely on totally, but not local. DCs doing their own thing. Miss the school gate for the connectedness I used to feel.

Isthebigwomanhere · 23/05/2019 19:29

@Sickofnamechanging I will go for a drink with you

HappyLifeError404 · 23/05/2019 19:30

Yes, I get it. Realised the other day that I had no one to call or meet for a catch up with. I'm not sure how it happened - I used to have a small band of good friends.

krustykittens · 23/05/2019 19:30

I am feeling pretty isolated in the new area I have moved to but a Mnetter suggested I try and meet new people on the Meet Up app and I may have a couple of new friendships to explore. Give it a go!

Alwaysgrey · 23/05/2019 19:31

Sadly same here. Two children with disabilities and I’ve found friendships have drifted. I also don’t work so chances of meeting people are slim.

Original poster
Sickofnamechanging · 23/05/2019 19:35

Thanks @isthebigwomanhere - mine's a G&T Grin Get one in for the others and take the money out of the kitty!

I would go out for a walk anyway - I've been for a walk (twice with dog) and it was lovely but that's not the point.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sickofnamechanging · 23/05/2019 19:38

Two children with disabilities and I’ve found friendships have drifted - that must be tough @Alwaysgrey. I think it's the lovely weather that's brought it home to me.

OP posts:
peardrops1 · 23/05/2019 19:39

I think everyone feels like this sometimes. (I know I do, anyway!)

RiverMeadow · 23/05/2019 19:48

Yes because I'm 40 weeks pregnant and even moving is an effort!

Chesntoots · 23/05/2019 19:57

I literally have nobody I can ring up and go for a drink/ chat/ walk with.

Mostly that's ok, but sometimes it really sucks!!

missmartini · 23/05/2019 20:07

I posted a few days ago about new friendships in 30s as I am feeling exactly like this. DP is away abroad to a stag for long weekend. I have DC until Sunday where my DM is taking them...and I have no one I can call upon to celebrate a free night with. I know I should be thankful of the time to myself but would be nice to invite someone over for take away, drinks and a chat.

Original poster
Sickofnamechanging · 23/05/2019 20:13

I'm just grateful no-one's bbq-ing - surefire way of making you feel like a billynomates on a summer evening Grin

OP posts:
TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER · 23/05/2019 20:13

Me.
I’m sitting looking out at the lovely blue sky and the sun still shining over the trees in the garden. And I’m furious about it. I wish it was winter where it’s acceptable to sit on the sofa doing nothing in my pjs with the curtains closed,

TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER · 23/05/2019 20:16

Also, I had to turn down an invite to an event earlier as I couldn’t take DD. The person who had offered me free tickets suggested I get a babysitter and take a friend. I lied about the only friend who would be interested being busy that day rather than admit I actually couldn’t think of a single person to ask to go with me.

Auntpetunia2015 · 23/05/2019 20:19

Me tonight long day in work with the most unfriendly and rude cliquey people then home to DD having a bad autism day because her PIP reconsideration has been refused (the only thing she’s said to me since I got in at 5 is it’s your fault it’s failed you didn’t do it properly!) been sat here since then just reading surfing mn and looking out at the sun which usually cheers me as I have a fab view of the sea and mountains but tonight it’s not working. Haven’t eaten can’t be bothered and no one to tell how crap it all is ..

Onescaredmuma · 23/05/2019 20:20

Me to 3 young kids a DH who works shifts leaves me very isolated after bed time Sad I'm about to move to be closer to family and I'm dreading it as I have lovely friends here who I can at least meet up with during the day pretty soon I'll loose that too. Family will still be 45 mins away and not the same as having friends to go for coffee play dates with as none of our family have children.

Misty9 · 23/05/2019 20:22

Yep me. Recently split with H and have lovely friends but they're all busy with family. No kids this weekend as it's H's weekend and a looong time stretching ahead of me with not much motivation to use it. I've joined meet up and might be brave enough to go along to an event this weekend. But I'm shit company right now Sad

Original poster
Sickofnamechanging · 23/05/2019 20:26

Haven’t eaten can’t be bothered and no one to tell how crap it all is

You've told me @Auntiepetunia2015 and I'm sorry you're feeling isolated.

I'm going to put a boxset on - Mum has been highly recommended!

OP posts:
Original poster
Sickofnamechanging · 23/05/2019 20:27

I've joined meet up and might be brave enough to go along to an event this weekend

Do it!

OP posts:
Isthebigwomanhere · 23/05/2019 20:27

Seriously though if anyone lives near Manchester and wants to meet up or just wants an email friend then I'm here for you.

I'm 47 with two adult children and a lot of spare time as Dp works shifts

weegiemum · 23/05/2019 20:29

Yes I'm feeling a bit like that too.

Dh is at work tonight, dd1 is a student and away, ds and dd2 both have an exam tomorrow so they're "studying" and I'm sitting here alone apart from the dog!

I became disabled 7 years ago and can no longer work (I was a teacher). I have found friends to be somewhat fickle and have a wee group who I do meet up with on occasion (usually coming here as my mobility is poor). I do go out if I can - Mumsnet knitting meet-ups in my city are always good fun!

At least you have a nice summer evening. I'm in Scotland and it's a cold wind tonight!

Hp737 · 23/05/2019 20:30

I feel your pain. I’m 30, one young dd, unfriendly job where I work to rule around dd school hours. My life is dd-work—dd repeat. My dp works away frequently and works in a super sociable environment so he doesn’t get this but when he’s away for the week (like now) I get really lonely and down. I try and escape into tv!