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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Re hot school meal and evening meal?

193 replies

rabbitheadlights · 22/05/2019 16:27

After reading a few threads about evening meals just lately where posted say that if DC's have a hot school meal then they generally do a snack type dinner such as crackers cheese and veg sticks or pot noodles etc.

AIBU to think this is the few and not the many?

My kids all of them healthy weights would be calling child line and declaring starvation if I didn't give them a "proper" cooked meal every night!! By proper I probably mean more substantial I certainly don't cook from scratch every day but I know I could never get away with the above

OP posts:
Aroundtheworldin80moves · 22/05/2019 17:08

Mine are currently enjoying their cold dinner... Fresh rolls from the bakery, meat, cheese, salad. They will have yoghurt and fruit too. Today it was Roast for their school lunch. They rarely want more than that in the evening.

Their is fortunate to have a fully trained chef in charge of the kitchen, all food cooked on site.

FunnyHappyGirl · 22/05/2019 17:11

I used to have school dinners at primary school and just the equivalent of a packed lunch when I got home, so sandwiches. My parents weren't well off so they were grateful that they didn't have to provide a full evening meal. I don't remember ever being hungry, but I was younger so I may be looking at this with rose-tinted glasses and my mum would tell you I cried every night through starvation!

When I went to secondary though the prices shot up and it was cheaper for my parents to feed me at home so just had a packed lunch in the day and a family dinner at home.

GruciusMalfoy · 22/05/2019 17:12

My kids don't mind a cold dinner, and I can't see anything wrong with them, but there has to be plenty of it for my ravenous 10.5yo son. The school meals here aren't big portions, but fine for lunchtime.

graziemille567 · 22/05/2019 17:13

I generally do a hot dinner for my DS in the evening, but if I've had a long day or my DH is away for work then I often fall back on easier teas. Cheese on toast, tuna mayo sandwiches, scrambled eggs, dippy eggs, noodles, picky teas of crackers, veg sticks, grapes, cheese etc...
DS does often have second helpings of lunch at nursery and gets a snack at 3pm too, so he isn't always that hungry at 5 when we get home.

Marvelendgame · 22/05/2019 17:13

So weird you've posted this as I was just thinking exactly the same.

Even if dc have a school/nursery 'hot' dinner, they still get a full meal at home.

Don't get me wrong, I don't always cook everything from scratch, it might be fish fingers, chips and beans one night or a baked potato, but we still have a full meal, something substantial.

Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with having a sandwich for tea, mine have had that or beans on toast. But I don't just decide oh well they've had a hot dinner at school, they can have crackers and cheese for tea.

arethereanyleftatall · 22/05/2019 17:14

A friend of mine seems to be of the opinion that a hot meal (even say fish fingers, chips and beans) is superior to a cold meal (even if that's cold mackerel, potato salad and green salad). Which is both weird and incorrect.

Marvelendgame · 22/05/2019 17:16

There's nothing wrong with cold food, it's not about whether the food is hot or cold.

It's some people saying that because their dc have had a school dinner, that they can just have a snack for tea

ooooohbetty · 22/05/2019 17:16

In my experience school dinners are not large. Mine were always absolutely ravenous when they got home from school and needed a proper meal, not a snack/light meal.

Drogosnextwife · 22/05/2019 17:17

My ds 5 would probably be fine with a snack for dinner but ds 10 would be horrified and dp would probably cry. I dont really care about dinner. Would happily have some toast. I live for breakfast and lunch Grin

BarnabasTheMaineCoon · 22/05/2019 17:18

Food is not magically more special or nutritious or filling just because it's hot Hmm.

Ragwort · 22/05/2019 17:18

Agree with rbvy, why are people obsessed with ‘hot’ meals Confused. The nutritional value of food does not depend on whether food is hot or cold.

If your kids would cause a riot if they didn’t get a hot meal Hmm I would be questioning my parenting skills.

Fatasfooook · 22/05/2019 17:18

Absolutely a full home cooked dinner in the evening. A school meal is usually fairly small and sometimes not the most nutritious. I would never rely on school to be the sole provider of my child’s daily nutrients!
Plus, imagine your kids growing up with memories of mums home cooking as cheese and biscuits? Nope!

solittletime · 22/05/2019 17:18

I think those of you remembering hot dinners at school don't realise how much dinners have changed.
Roast day at our school is a slice of meat so thin you can see through it. The vegetables are often unappealing even for an adult.
The amount of food I see children throw away at lunch time is scary. They are often rushed or not encouraged to sit longer and finish ( apart from the little kids)
The portions are not enough to satisfy our year 5 and 6.
Since I started working in a school I now understand why on some days my dc are ravenous at pick up time!

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 22/05/2019 17:19

Have to admit that I often have a school lunch and then I eat very little for dinner as I find the school meal very filling (even if I skip the pudding). My DCs never had school meals so always a cooked dinner for them.

I look at the amount of food our children put away in the dining hall and I’m amazed... even my DH doesn’t eat the amount of food that was on the plate of the child I sat next to today...

WorraLiberty · 22/05/2019 17:19

It's some people saying that because their dc have had a school dinner, that they can just have a snack for tea

Yes but that's more than enough for some kids. As long as the snack is nutritional I can't see a problem.

As long as parents remember to teach their kids how to cook. Then again that goes for all of us no matter what our preferences.

Mummyoflittledragon · 22/05/2019 17:23

My dd is quite a fussy eater. Until recently she didn’t want to eat hot food much. It isn’t the temperature of the food, it’s the content. For years she had cold packed lunch and often things like eggs in the evening - her repertoire of food was very limited.

Then she went onto dinners some days, which she’s fed up with again. She’s now gone the other way and wants hot packed lunch every day so I’ve bought a food flask and am giving her composite meals like pasta bolognese. She doesn’t like eating a roast for example. But loves a spread of bits and bobs such as cold roast chicken, cheese chunks, baguette bread, veg sticks etc.

Ideally she would have eaten a hot meal once a day. But you can’t force a child. And with me being chronically ill I am not always able to cook. So brown food also was my go to at those times, which she’s gone off now.

PCohle · 22/05/2019 17:23

I was assuming people were using "hot dinner" as a shorthand for a proper, full meal rather that just a snack.

To be honest I can't really think of an entirely cold dinner I serve, but I agree there's no magic quality about hot food.

Mummyoflittledragon · 22/05/2019 17:23

I mean beige food....

PumpkinPie2016 · 22/05/2019 17:24

My son always has a big tea even though he has (and eats!) School dinners.

He seems to be permanently hungry!

He's 5 and tall and skinny so its noy harming him. He does eat well though - not all chocolate/crisps.

Original poster
rabbitheadlights · 22/05/2019 17:25

@ragwort I said they would cause a riot if the meal were not substantial

OP posts:
Fatasfooook · 22/05/2019 17:26

Also, there is a growing problem of children not knowing how to use cutlery, not having table manners etc. A proper evening meal with the family is where these skills are learned.

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 22/05/2019 17:29

Re learning to cook... My 6yo was practising her bread knife skills on the rolls tonight... Does that make it a better meal?

arethereanyleftatall · 22/05/2019 17:29

There's a somewhat strange misconception running through this thread, that if the food is cold and snacky, that it can't possibly be nutritious, neither could you sit at a table and chat and enjoy family time whilst eating it. Which is a bit strange, as of course you can do any of that stuff regardless of how long you've spent stressing over a stove.
In fact, the converse is true, food often becomes less nutritional once you start cooking it; a raw carrot is better for you that a cooked one.

rvby · 22/05/2019 17:30

It's some people saying that because their dc have had a school dinner, that they can just have a snack for tea

You don't know what a "snack" is though, to different folk. Some people called any food that isn't piping hot off the stove/oven a "snack", because they have a cultural thing that it's not a meal if it's not "hot". It doesn't necessarily mean fewer calories than a so-called "meal".

E.g. I often cook fish and veg with rice for my dc for supper. Definitely a "proper dinner". Actually no more than 400 cal. But a large slice of meat pizza is 450 cal. Eat that cold, many folk will say it's a snack. Same cals though.

FancyAPint · 22/05/2019 17:31

OP I appreciate yours aren't but I think 2 large meals a day may be contributing to the obesity epidemic!