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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Re hot school meal and evening meal?

193 replies

rabbitheadlights · 22/05/2019 16:27

After reading a few threads about evening meals just lately where posted say that if DC's have a hot school meal then they generally do a snack type dinner such as crackers cheese and veg sticks or pot noodles etc.

AIBU to think this is the few and not the many?

My kids all of them healthy weights would be calling child line and declaring starvation if I didn't give them a "proper" cooked meal every night!! By proper I probably mean more substantial I certainly don't cook from scratch every day but I know I could never get away with the above

OP posts:
ScabbyHorse · 22/05/2019 16:44

I work in a school at lunch times and have worked in several and tbh most of the children do not eat very much of their hot dinners. Even the packed lunches they often throw away when we are not looking.
I would judge it by how hungry your kids seem at dinner time rather than by assuming they've eaten a certain amount.

Grumpbum123 · 22/05/2019 16:44

I just give them an option especially now as eldest can get a picnic type lunch at school instead of a hot dinner

WorraLiberty · 22/05/2019 16:47

Each to their own really.

School dinners (especially at Primary school), tend to be just a light meal, as children will then run around/do PE straight after, so nearly always much less than a parent might serve.

I always cooked a proper dinner for mine regardless of what they had for lunch, as I'd be cooking for me and DH anyway.

Thesearmsofmine · 22/05/2019 16:48

I think it’s fine. My dc are home ed and certainly don’t have two hot dinner type meals a day!

Gatehouse77 · 22/05/2019 16:48

Evening meal is always hot and a family meal unless we've been out for a big/late lunch at the weekend. Then it's usually a DIY supper as they're older but when they were younger it was still likely to be eggs/beans/cheese on toast, pasta pesto, bacon and eggs type meal.

When I was a young'un if we were having a packed lunch we had to have a hot breakfast! I remember having fishmongers and baked beans for breakfast - yum, yum!

MummyBear2352 · 22/05/2019 16:49

I saw one post asking if was acceptable to give cold dinners in the evening if they've had hot lunches at school and I think it is. I agree with you that giving your child a snack for dinner isn't sufficient. I think children should be getting breakfast and then either a hot lunch and a cold dinner, a cold lunch and a hot dinner or a hot lunch and a hot dinner.

choli · 22/05/2019 16:50

I don't think the temperature of a meal has any effect on nutritional value, though it may make the cook feel virtuous.

myhamster · 22/05/2019 16:50

A meal is a meal, it doesn't have to be hot food. DD has a cooked dinner every day, so has a sandwich tea most evenings.

There does seem to be some weird obsession that if a meal isn't cooked, or hot, that it isn't a filling meal. Food is food.

If I cooked beans or egg on toast, I would call that a meal too.

DD likes microwaved macaroni cheese. Shoot me now.

Original poster
rabbitheadlights · 22/05/2019 16:51

I think @rvby is spot on, maybe that's what's wrong with me?!

OP posts:
whiteonesugar · 22/05/2019 16:52

DS is at nursery, he has packed lunch and they have 'tea' at about 3.30pm which is usually sandwiches so I like to give him a 'proper' dinner when he gets home which he usually leaves half of!

When he goes to school I will be aiming for a proper dinner at home too, but picky dinners are fine now and then surely?

Pomegranateseeds · 22/05/2019 16:53

I just don’t understand why some pp think a cold meal is insufficient? I agree a snack might not be enough, but why is something “not a proper meal” just because it’s cold?

adaline · 22/05/2019 16:53

@happyhillock @Mygoodlygodlingtons why do you think a hot meal is more filling than a cold one? Is a toasted sandwich more filling than a cold one somehow? Confused

Original poster
rabbitheadlights · 22/05/2019 16:54

Please don't think this post was any kind of assumption or judgement it really isn't. It is exactly what I said in that I think my kids would cause a riot and I wish I could get away with doing it now and again

OP posts:
Hullabaloo31 · 22/05/2019 16:54

Exactly what @WillYouDoTheFandango said! My son would eat cereal or packed lunch for every meal given the chance. Mine only really has the hot dinner on my 3 work days, when his sister has her tea at nursery, so he just has sandwiches or beans/scrambled egg on toast for tea those days. He'd do that every day given the chance!

Riverviews · 22/05/2019 16:57

My 16 year old boy would eat his own arms if he didn't have 2 hot meals per day, and plenty of snacks in between

Fuzzyspringroll · 22/05/2019 16:58

DS gets a hot lunch at nursery. The portions aren't small and he sometimes has two or three helpings. He then gets snack (provided by us) a bit later at around 4pm. We get home and then have dinner at about 7pm. We leave it up to him whether he wants to eat at that point. Sometimes, he doesn't eat the lunch at nursery. They get soup every Friday and he refuses to eat that.

ReanimatedSGB · 22/05/2019 16:58

I have a bottomless pit of a teenager, so snacks when he gets home and then a large meal. In hot weather it might be sandwiches, but it will be several sandwiches, fruit, cake, etc. Because I tend to fancy hot/cold food depending on the weather more than anything else.

PCohle · 22/05/2019 16:58

I always do a hot dinner. I'm cooking for DH and I anyway so it's probably less hassle than making the kids sandwiches/soup regardless. Plus my now teenage boys would be bloody starving if I didn't give them a big dinner.

Bigearringsbigsmile · 22/05/2019 16:59

I'd run out of packed lunch food today so I had a school dinner.
It was tiny and uninspiring and if that was my real main meal of the day I would cry.
How on earth they are supposed to get children eating healthily I don't know.

Rottielottie · 22/05/2019 17:00

I always give DC a hot meal in the evening regardless of meal at school

BarnabasTheMaineCoon · 22/05/2019 17:01

I taught mine to cook for themselves. I CBA'd anymore with that shit and I pay a bomb for the school dinners.

Allyg1185 · 22/05/2019 17:01

My ds ( almost 8 ) has a packed lunch because he doesn't like alot of what's on the school menu plus can't be bothered waiting in the line. I give him a choice for tea. Most nights it's a cooked meal but at least once a week he will ask for either beans/scrambled eggs with toast. He is thriving so clearly getting enough calories and nutrition in a day

HolesinTheSoles · 22/05/2019 17:02

Mine are starving in the evening definitely couldn't get by on snacks. They have their school dinner at 12 anyway so it's a long time to go to bed time.

HolesinTheSoles · 22/05/2019 17:02

That said you could still have a balanced, substantial cold meal. I don't think it necessarily has to be hot!

TheQueef · 22/05/2019 17:07

I had tokens growing up so my hot meal was at school. There was always sandwich makings if I wanted or I could wait until tea at seven, I had sandwiches and evening meal, I would blame school saying I was being starved.
It might be hereditary because DC always had second tea. One after school with Nan and then late with me.