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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

CF vulture picking over my dead mum's belongings.

73 replies

GetMeOffThisCycleOfMisery · 22/05/2019 06:03

Not an AIBU strictly speaking, but wanted to share this CF situation I had yesterday with you.

So, I unfortunately lost my mum 4 weeks ago.

Sadly, my mum didn't own her home, nor did she have much money, so while clearing out her place (which she recently decorated on a budget and furnished) I have been listing her belongings on Facebook Marketplace, to raise money for her ashes to be interred.

CF messaged me on Friday, wanting to buy her desktop printer. Fine. However, it was my mum's funeral on Friday, so I didn't read and reply obviously.

He keeps on sending more messages through the day to get me to reply, he's keen and not to know I'm at my mum's funeral, so I ignored him.

I finally reply on Saturday, it's £15 for a fairly new £45 Epson printer. He agrees he wants it and we arrange for him to collect from my mum's yesterday, as I'm there again doing more sorting and cleaning.

He texts to say he's on his way and adds "£10, okay?" Um, no dude. Not okay. It's £15. He arrives and I tell him it's £15. He starts pulling a face, I'm like, "As you can see, this is an old people's accommodation, not my house. I've lost my mum and raising money to bury her. So it's £15. The software is all there unopened, it's good as new!"

He very reluctantly pays up (from a big wad of £20s incidentally!) and asks what other things I am selling, so I show him around. He says he likes a beautiful side table and asks how much. I say £20. He replies, "But can I have it for free?" I repeat that sadly not, I'm raising money to bury my mum remember?

He then starts poking around all of my mum's meagre belongings and asks, "So what is here, that I can take for free then?"

Absolutely nothing you fucking vulture, piss off!

I didn't say that, as I was of course 'terribly British' and apologised that nothing was for free.

To be honest, anything that is left will go to a deserving local charity, not to a CF.

He took his printer and pissed off. Fucking wanker.

Some people are beyond disgusting aren't they?

OP posts:

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 22/05/2019 09:41

EVERY time i have sold something like this had happened. We sold our lazyboi couch/suite a few months ago, agreed on a price of £500. They came to house to view with potential to pick up there and then, they loved it and wanted it and they said they only had £400 with them and asked if that was okay... eh NO.

then they moaned that they had come all the way to pick it up and didnt have their bank card and if they had to go all the way home and return then i should at least be covering the cost of their time and petrol and should knock £50 off the price.

They want you on the back foot, but I'd counter that and react with exaggerated annoyance and demand to know why they didn't bring enough money with them when they know the agreed price. Ask them if they do the same in Tesco and still expect to leave with their trolley-load and why they saw fit to waste my time by fraudulently posing as a ready and able buyer. Maybe throw in a bit of patronising pity and treat it as though they're clearly too stupid to understand what most 4yo children know - that you can't buy something priced at £500 if you only have £400.

People like this are never grateful, though - if you agree to a lower offer, they'll see that as a sign of your gullibility and try to take further advantage. They probably won't push the price for that item even lower than what they stated they'd be willing/able to pay, but, like in the OP's situation, they'll pressure you to throw extra stuff in for free, to bag themselves a double bunce.

I recall a thread quite some time ago where there was a man buying something relatively cheap in a charity shop and randomly asked if they could throw in a nearby guitar for free. When they told him "Errrr, NO!!!!" and said what the price of the guitar was if he wanted it too, he sulked and claimed that he wouldn't be able to make a profit in his second-hand shop if he 'only' had the original item to sell at an inflated price.

It's the very definition of 'entitled'. It never even enters into these people's minds that you're a person too and just as important as they are - they merely see you as, at best, an accessory to enabling them to live their lives as they prefer or, at worst, an obstacle standing in the way of their having free-rein to what they want and believe they should rightfully have - even though they are your possessions and fully remain so until the point that you decide to sell them for an acceptable price.

wonderwhat · 22/05/2019 09:44

Some people are just vile

Otterseatpuffinsdontthey · 22/05/2019 09:46

thenightsky · 22/05/2019 10:00

When we were moving out of our first home, the chap buying it offered us £50 cash for the cooker. We agreed, but it got to moving day and he'd never paid. He turned up with his van to move in as I was doing a final wipe round the floors and saw we'd disconnected the cooker to take it with us. He admitted he'd never planned to pay us, assuming we'd be kind stupid enough to give in and leave it.

TheInvestigator · 22/05/2019 10:09

Sorry, odd question but are you allowed to let random people up into the flats in sheltered accommodation? I used to volunteer as a support worker and one of my clients lived in sheltered accommodation. To gain access, I had to the warden my ID and proove who I actually was. One of the guidelines of the accommodation was no random people allowed up to the flats. It's a secure building, with a warden. The residents are allowed visitors of course, but not allowed random people off the internet to come a collect things from their homes since that person would then be wandering around the building which is full of vulnerable people.

Cryalot2 · 22/05/2019 10:13

So sorry for your lose
He ŕeally was vile and the lowest of low.
Did you get his name? I would both mention to the warden and the local police .

Original poster

GetMeOffThisCycleOfMisery · 22/05/2019 11:31

Hey thanks all. It was good for me to to share this. Loving the replies. I'm definitely primed for dealing with future FB buyers who may be CFs too.

For those that asked. I've not been letting buyers into the accommodation. I've been meeting them at the main door and exchange there. The CF yesterday wanted to test the printer worked, so I let him in, the warden saw him in and my friend was with me in the flat.

Some of you shared your own CF stories and they were shocking. Such a shame some people are so disgusting and grabby.

OP posts:

Original poster

GetMeOffThisCycleOfMisery · 22/05/2019 11:31

Thank you for your kind words of condolence too. xx

OP posts:

Rottielottie · 22/05/2019 11:33

Wow that’s vile. Sorry about your mum OP.

Gth1234 · 22/05/2019 12:19

Sad to say, but in the end I am sure you will find you have a lot of stuff that won't go, and you will end needing a skip to get rid. Or house clearance guys who will charge you for the privilege.

user1486131602 · 22/05/2019 12:23

Let it go, you have enough to deal with.
His behaviour says a lot about him and nothing about you.
My condolences x

Spidey66 · 22/05/2019 12:44

Sorry about your loss.

After my mum died, we sold her house. A neighbour bought it. sying he was going to let his newly married daughter live there so we ended up leaving a few bits of furniture in it for nothing.

Fast forward a few months, and it's on the lettings pages of an estate agents website.

TheInvestigator · 22/05/2019 12:57

@Spidey66

He hasn't really done anything wrong or cheeky there though, has he?

Plans change for all sorts or reasons. Maybe the daughter or her husband didn't like it or didn't want to live next door to him or they found somewhere better or got jobs somewhere else and had to move. All sorts of things can change. He could also have been making it up for the sake of a chat but who cares, doesn't affect the sale. You chose to leave furniture, he didn't ask for it. That could actually have been quote annoying if they didn't like it because they'd have the expense of getting rid of it.

mommybear1 · 22/05/2019 14:17

So sorry about your Mom OP . What a vile creature I think you were generous to let him buy the printer tbh!

Spidey66 · 22/05/2019 14:26

@TheInvestigator of course he was free to do with it as he wished. We offered to get rid of the furniture or leave it in the house, but he said it would really help the family if we could leave it. When it was online it was still with my mum's furniture in it. We definitely got the impression it was planned, though of course we've no way of knowing for certain.

mommybear1 · 22/05/2019 14:27

So sorry about your Mom OP . What a vile creature I think you were generous to let him buy the printer tbh!

ThatRelative · 19/06/2019 15:18

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TheQueef · 19/06/2019 15:48

Very helpful Relative

S1naidSucks · 19/06/2019 15:52

ThatRelative I’m hoping you just weren’t thinking, but that’s really not on. You shouldn’t link people to other sites. I’m reporting your post so Mumsnet can take down the link.

AdobeWanKenobi · 19/06/2019 15:53

Poor form indeed @ThatRelative

lmusic87 · 19/06/2019 15:57

I'm so sorry OP, try to forget about such an evil person. xxx

MrsExpo · 19/06/2019 16:00

That's awful. Sorry for your loss.Sorting out effects like that is hard enough to do without that sort of CFery going on.

GetMeOffThisCycleOfMysery · 19/06/2019 19:15

Thanks all. This thread was a few weeks ago. Slowly coming out the other side.

All I have left to sell is her leather sofas, one year old. Yes the CF are still out in force though. Twats!

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