Is he odd

[fluffysoxfortwo]

Newish relationship.. just a couple of
Months . Getting to know e eachother a bit better but a couple of things are making me feel uneasy..
he seems to light up in male company, not so much in mine . He comments on the attractiveness of random men all the time but not me. Dislikes make up on me, despisesanything false ... lashes/ long nails / tan etc
Not hugely interested in intercourse or oral but likes kissing me. Spends an extraordinary amount of time with his friends and his family in lieu of me . Likes to keep us seperate . Aibu here ?

Depends how much you like being a beard 🤷

Does sound a bit odd, yes. But doesn’t actually matter if he’s odd or not. Matters if you like him how he is.

Is he capable of making you happy? I couldn’t be happy with a guy who was ambivalent about intercourse/oral. and those first few months together should ‘can’t get enough of each other’s company’ stage.

Honestly I would let it end sooner rather than later and look for a better fit for you.

I prefer female company to Male. I regularly comment on attractive women. I also loathe obvious make up (but love other feminine things like lace, ruffles etc. on women). I’m definitely not attracted to women. This seems to be a case of him not being that into you. His sexual orientation is quite irrelevant.

Yes actually I agree with the PP... I prefer female company too and hate the "fake" look and also often comment on how pretty other women look... Don't think those bits are too worrying. Even if he was bisexual shouldn't really be affecting your relationship. The parts about not spending time with you,disinterest in sex and keeping you separate though are a bit of a concern. Have you spoken about it at all?

Yes we have spoken about it and he says that this is just the way he is ! In a sincere and kind way he is of the opinion that this is the way he is, take it or leave it! He is used to not being in a relationship and enjoys his own space and wants to take things at his own pace

What matters is whether any of these behaviors are deal-brakers for you. The lack of interest in sex would be for me, but you have to decide for yourself.

I can cope without it at the present but worry about the future . I can't predict that and I do like it

Does he try to stop you wearing makeup and false nails (if you like these things?).

Do you enjoy his company?

Does he make you feel attractive and special?

Do you find him attractive?

Errrr. His sexual orientation is quite important if the OP considers him her boyfriend! I was seeing someone like this years ago. I always had a niggling feeling he was gay. Never found out if he was, but something wasn’t right.....

Trust your gut feeling.

He doesn't try to stop me but is vocal in his feelings towards them. Like.. they look cheap etc . When together he makes me feel great, we have a brilliant time and get on fantastically well . However , I would like more and the pace he wants it at is frustratingly slow .

I have a feeling this isn't going anywhere, OP.

No interest in sex (yet) when you should be unable to keep your hands off each other.

That doesn't sound great, if I'm honest.

Are any of you in a relationship where sex isnt priority ? Or have been? Can it work if you're sexual and your partner isn't?

I find that when it comes to being in an unfamiliar environment the outer layers come off and you see what going on, on the inside. Have you been away on holiday or been in a situation that has been stressing for you both? You find then that you either compliment each others weaknesses and strengths or it doesn't work.
If sex is a priority for you then you will have to discuss your feelings and needs to work to a satisfactory solution. Leaving it wont make it any better and it wont go away. All the best.

We haven't had any stress yet. We are going away on holidays for a week in the summer so maybe that will be telling . We have only ever had a night or two away together. Mostly due to work commitments and distance, we only see eachother at weekends and a night during the week so perhaps you're right. A week together will be telling . I would like a physical relationship more than it is now

Anyone have this experience?

He comments on how attractive other men are all the time?? Hmm. Could he be gay??

You're meant to be in the honeymoon period, op, where you don't want to spend a minute apart and have sex all the time. If you're happy with what you have instead, then carry on...

I don't think so but he will admire a good looking face or a toned body on a man , not sleazy but he will acknowledge if a man keeps himself fit or not, as the case may be?? I thought that was quite normal ?his own face and body are important to him and he is vey body confident but not cocky about it

I'm struggling to understand why you would be in a romantic relationship with someone who comments on the attractiveness of other people but never on yours, and who seems uninterested in sexual intimacy with you after only a couple of months.
What makes you think it will change? If not, is this really what you want to settle for?

He does find me attractive or at least says he does . He just isn't very sexual . He tells me I look nice etc .

Does he tell you that you look nice only when you're wearing things he approves of? Do you still wear false lashes, nails and tan or are you altering your behaviour to keep him happy? Whatever his sexual preferences, nobody should tell you how to dress.

I don't really wear a lot of make up around him . He thinks it dirty
Looking . He says he loves me looking natural.

So, you wear less make up when you're with him because he prefers you looking more natural? Perhaps you should write out a list of what you're actually getting out of this relationship, because from here it looks hellishly little.

We get on brilliantly and do lovely things together ! Of course I am not going to wear make Up if he doesn't find it attractive. It doesn't bother me too much and I still
Wear a little and for nights out. I was never caked in make up but still liked to do it fully . We have a lot going on in our relationship but I wonder do peoples sex drives improve over time?

If you want to wear make up etc then that is up to you. Don't let him start telling you what to wear or what not to wear. I would say from your OP that you are not satisfied or happy with the relationship, so maybe it is time to end it if this is the case while it is early days