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AIBU?

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Original poster

Would I be being an a**hole if I told the postman to f**koff?

67 replies

LauraJade0308 · 20/05/2019 19:53

Not sure if I’m just overreacting, but I’m starting to get angry, and quite a bit upset.

Every morning for the last week the postman has rung our (very loud) buzzer to let him into our block of flats. On 3 of these days, he didn’t even have any mail for us!!
I have an 8 week old baby that has his nap in the mornings. I have asked the postman previously to not ring ours, we are the only ones in the block with children, but he just shrugged.
Today was one of the days he rang, with no mail. I was feeding DS at the time and couldn’t get up to answer, yet he just kept buzzing over and over.
I managed to put baby down as I was gonna go and give him a mouthful, but he’d already gone.
Should I wait for him tomorrow morning and say something? I don’t want to sound mean, but he’s already been told and I don’t know what else to do!

OP posts:
MissUGirl · 20/05/2019 19:55

Why doesn't he have a key? Royal Mail normally hold a tradesman's key if they need access to post boxes.

Grumpelstilskin · 20/05/2019 19:56

Call the relevant area office and complain about him to his manager.

Perch · 20/05/2019 19:57

You’re allowed to say asshole and fuck off.

He sounds bit dickish, but you are probably one of hundreds on his round and he just wants to get it done. Can you disconnect your buzzer for a couple of weeks and tell friends to text when they arrive instead?

madcatladyforever · 20/05/2019 19:59

Ring his head office as he is not listening g to you.

keepingbees · 20/05/2019 20:00

Can you put a note or sticker on your buzzer button saying no buzzing - baby asleep?

Chefwifelife · 20/05/2019 20:01

Hell hath no fury like a sleep deprived parent! Ring the head offices and let rip Mumma!

FraggleRocking · 20/05/2019 20:02

Totally unacceptable. You should definitely complain to your local office.

RebootYourEngine · 20/05/2019 20:04

Most block of flats I know have a buzzer for tradespeople. Does yours have this?

Or does your buzzer have a snooze button that you can turn on until a certain time of day?

This would piss me off. I think I would complain to your local sorting office.

LesserBohemian · 20/05/2019 20:04

Is he ringing yours as he knows you’re home with the baby and will let him in?

I’d definitely have a word but he will probably keep doing it if you’re the only one home to answer it so that he can just get on with it. In which case you may need to ignore it for a few days.

Perhaps call the local centre and arrange a tradesman key?

slipperywhensparticus · 20/05/2019 20:06

There is usually a trades button to buzz themselves in and a snooze button on your buzzer

Happynow001 · 20/05/2019 20:07

Can you disconnect your buzzer for a couple of weeks and tell friends to text when they arrive instead?
This ^^. Though you shouldn't have to. regarding reporting him - I can see why you'd want to do this and you should be able to do so. I'm be concerned what games he'd play with my mail in
retaliation, however...

TheInvestigator · 20/05/2019 20:09

Call Royal Mail and make a complaint. In the meantime, answer your buzzer and ask if he has post for you. If he says no, then do not buzz him in.

TrendyNorthLondonTeen · 20/05/2019 20:11

Does your buzzer not have a privacy function or way you can put it onto silent?

DerbyRacer · 20/05/2019 20:13

When I lived in a flat there was a button for trades people. We had it set so the postman could press it between certain times and it would give him access. I also was able to switch my buzzer off so it would not buzz in my flat.

It is important people get their mail. What would happen if no one was in on week days when the postman came. Would you all not get any mail until the weekend?

Gertie75 · 20/05/2019 20:13

Answer the door and if he hasn't got mail for you then don't let him in.

Sexnotgender · 20/05/2019 20:13

YANBU, I’ve got a 15 week old so know how you feel! I think I’d have killed him by now.

Can you not disconnect your buzzer? My old one you could switch off.

BuzzShitbagBobbly · 20/05/2019 20:15

If it's an entryphone type one, can you leave it "off the hook" - does that work? (rather than fully disconnecting it)

TrendyNorthLondonTeen · 20/05/2019 20:16

"Answer the door and if he hasn't got mail for you then don't let him in."

What difference does that make?

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 20/05/2019 20:18

You need a different system for your doorway.
Don't blame the postie, he's got to do his thankless, underpaid, completely essential job.
For now can you disable/quieten the bell or put a note on your buzzer?
Sometimes you will have post, no?

KissUntilTheyDieOfRabies · 20/05/2019 20:19

We have an enormous issue with people even from in the other five flats on our block, using the fucking trade button, and our button gets independently buzzed a lot too, just because people want to come in.

Pisses me the fuck off. Our system doesn't actually give us much time to get to the intercom before it just stops, so I've fallen over before, trying to answer it only to find out it's a neighbour who could have just rung their own buzzer and had their partner let them in.

Even more novel idea, they could try taking their fucking keys.

But it's different with the post. We can't just turn ours off from the trade button. It's either on or silent. I've had shitty idiot drunken weekend buzzing between 11pm and 4.15am, specially recently. Went out my front door and laid into our opposite neighbour for being such a grade a dickwad.

Laminate a pic of the beautiful new baby with writing under saying date and time born, weight, gender etc, and a 'polite notice but unless you are specifically calling for us at number X, please do not ring our buzzer because mum and baby are feeding and sleeping in the day, thanks' etc

TheInvestigator · 20/05/2019 20:19

It will stop him doing it again. She can’t go around shouting at the postman. If they feel at all threatened then they won’t deliver to your address and all post from that building will need to be collected from the nearest depot. And if she shouts at him, then he will claim that it is ok dangerous to deliver to that address. So don’t confront him. You’ve asked him and he’s ignored you. Make your complaint, but in the meantime just make it more hassle than it’s worth for him.

BogglesGoggles · 20/05/2019 20:20

Just stop letting him in.

RobinHumphries · 20/05/2019 20:26

I had this same problem when I was a student in a houseshare, only, because I was one of the downstairs bedrooms he’d bang on my window. I was never brave enough to say anything but I hated it.

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 20/05/2019 20:28

How about installing a letterbox in the main door
(call me old fashioned)

Ihatemyseleffordoingthis · 20/05/2019 20:31

Actually I'd put a note on your buzzer saying it's broken

But suggest the management company sort out an exterior postbox thing which you all have a key for