To be scared about this attraction I'm feeling?

[justwonderingtbh]

I've name changed for this post, but a long time poster.
I'm 22 years old and have just started a new office job. There was another newbie at the same time as me so we were trained together and have now become friends.
I found myself having a bit of a crush on him, he's tall, got a tattoo sleeve, great hair and a good beard, dresses well too.
I don't shit where I eat so wouldn't ever want anything to happen anyway but I do feel attracted to him - a lot!
Ive found myself fantasising about him and I assumed he was around 23/24. I've just found out that he's 17! I feel disgusted in myself! I feel so ashamed, he's still a minor! I feel like some sort of predator

Even more reason to forget this boy.

You don’t need to be ashamed, or afraid.

Just put it behind you and move on.

He’s a young good looking guy, being attracted to him isn’t something shameful or scary but you certainly don’t need to act on it if you don’t want to and it definitely doesn’t make you a predator!!

I’ll probably get shot for this but I don’t think 17 and 22 is a dreadful age gap at all! If you like each other then why not?!

Don’t be ashamed - you didn’t know, you’ve never acted on those feelings, and you were never inappropriate. You haven’t done anything wrong!

You dont need to be disgusted. He obviously looks and acts older than 17. You haven't done anything wrong. Just think of him as a friend/coworker and carry on as normal.

If my ds told me he was with a 22 year old I wouldn't be happy.

I also dont see the big deal. You are not his teacher or anything.You might find him a bit immature though at 17.

Next time I meet someone I'm definitely going to ask their age straight away!
A load of us from work are meant to be going out next week and I keep thinking what if I hadn't have found out and something would have happened between us after a drink!
I always get so angry when men have sex with 16/17 year old girls and then say they didn't know they were so young. I've always thought that was a weak excuse because they should've found out, and now I'm basically the same!

He's 17. He would not be employed in any office I've ever worked in, in my life. For insurance purposes alone they have all been 18+.

I've worked in a fair few offices with 17 year olds, it's only call centre work that I do so maybe they're not as strict as other places? I don't think the person who told me he's 17 would have any reason to lie

I've worked in a few offices where there have been 17 year olds, I have only ever done call centre work so maybe they're less strict? I'm not sure but I don't think he'd be lying about being 17 surely? If anything you'd say you were older wouldn't you at that age?

I know 16 and 17 year olds who work in an office. It isn't always easy to judge someones age. Although he shouldn't have a tattoo under 18

Meh. My first boyfriend was 24 when I was 18. It’s not a big age gap. You haven’t done anything, you’re not in a position of responsibility and you have nothing to feel bad about.

Sorry that I posted twice, I didn't think the first one sent.
He probably fooled the tattoo artist too because he looks so old. Either that or maybe a friend did it or he got parents consent, not sure

You can't get parents consent for a tattoo, you have to be 18. But yes, he could've lied.

Though I'd just ask him directly, who told you he was 17?

I'm baffled by the responses here. My ex dh was 17 when I met him, I was 21. We were together for 15 years, never even thought about the age gap and apart from a few childish comments from folk in the early days, nobody else cared. His mum welcomed me from day 1, we're still good friends now.
I certainly don't see why you should feel ashamed, unless you already have a partner!

Oh I thought you could, I'm probably thinking about piercings.
Somebody else in the office mentioned how they can't believe he's only 17, and then I slipped it into conversation with him and he said that he's 17

@Fiveredbricks how odd
I worked in offices doing temp work from the age of 15. Call centres, admin work etc.
Every company I’ve ever worked for has had offices juniors aged 16+

5 year age gap is nothing to worry about. There's 5 years between me and my husband, we also met at work if you two hit it off I don't see any problem going for it. Just take it really slow. If the age is no good then no worries, don't date him. Don't be ashamed of not being able to mind read his age

Also I managed to get a tattoo aged 16 with no parental consent. I know the legal age is 18 but some places just aren’t that moral or law abiding

Oh I thought you could, I'm probably thinking about piercings.
Somebody else in the office mentioned how they can't believe he's only 17, and then I slipped it into conversation with him and he said that he's 17

@justwonderingtbh when is he 18? If he was 18 in the next few months would that make you feel less uncomfortable with your feelings?
17 is a minor but not for sex so I wouldn’t be making yourself feel grossed out by it.

I'm not sure when he's 18 tbh, but you're right that probably would make me feel a bit better. I think I just have it in my head that an adult with someone under 18 is really wrong

Why on earth do young men (well, children in this case) now have silly comedy beards which always were, and still should be, the preserve of old men.

Yuck.