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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To put my daughter in nursery for nearly 50 hours this week

41 replies

riotlady · 16/05/2019 17:17

My daughter is booked in to attend nursery full-time, which is 8-5.30 5 days a week. She never actually goes this much as I’m a student so usually have a day off during the week (when I’m not on placement) and can often pick her up early as well.

This week I’m off but partner and I have both contracted a horrible stomach virus. I’ve had diarrhoea and vomiting since Monday, can’t even keep water down, am lightheaded, exhausted, etc and spending half my time in the bathroom.

So far we’ve managed to avoid little one picking it up (she’s nearly 14 months)- we’ve been washing our hands before we touch her or anything of hers and dettolling like mad. We’ve been sending her in to nursery for the full hours. I was hoping I’d be well enough to keep her home with us tomorrow but honestly I still feel terrible and I haven’t stopped vomiting. I feel really guilty putting her in nursery for such long hours when I’m at home but do you think it’s alright as it’s just one week?

Next week I have a very light week at uni so hopefully she’ll only be in about 24 hours.

OP posts:
Original poster
riotlady · 16/05/2019 17:18

Oh and my periods just come on, to make me feel even worse! Sad

OP posts:
CastleCrasher · 16/05/2019 17:20

Unless she completely hates the place, which she clearly doesn't or you'd have said, it's fine. She'll no doubt have a lot more fun than she would at home with you so sick, she'll hopefully avoid catching it, and you can have fun next week.

springgreensunshine · 16/05/2019 17:21

You've got to do what you've got to do. Having fun at nursery has got to be better for her than being at home if you can't really play with her. And it makes it much less likely she'll catch your bug.
Make next week extra nice for her when you're hopefully feeling better.

hullaballoonie · 16/05/2019 17:24

I was going to say that's too much, but as a one off under difficult circumstances, absolutely fineThanks

Slomi · 16/05/2019 17:32

If its actually a stomach virus and not just food poisoning or something then YABVU to send her to nursery at all. You know that stomach viruses can have an incubation period of 12-48 hours during which time she could be passing it on to however many other kids?

AuntMarch · 16/05/2019 17:33

It's better than a day spent with sick people! Nursery is fun, she's fine

GloGirl · 16/05/2019 17:34

Slomi, you cant keep a child off if you think they might get something. No child would ever go in!

autumnnightsaredrawingin · 16/05/2019 17:35

It’s 100% fine. Don’t feel bad. To the person who said YABU in case she is incubating the virus- really?! Hmm Are people meant to keep their kids off nursery/school every time they get ill even if their child is not?

autumnnightsaredrawingin · 16/05/2019 17:37

Also, many children do more than 50 hrs at daycare. Yes it’s not ideal, but it happens. I know of children in 5 days a week, 7.30/8.00 am until 7pm. So again, to the person who said 50 hours regularly is too much- it’s fairly normal.

Slomi · 16/05/2019 17:38

Some stomach viruses are highly, highly contagious and yes if most of the family is off sick with it, I think you should keep your kids off too and I have done in the past. Very selfish to risk a whole pile of children getting ill. Stomach virus is not funny.

InTheEndgameNow · 16/05/2019 17:42

Oh wow, there are always stomach bugs going round our school in the winter. Imagine if every parent kept their kid off "just in case" Shock

Your daughter will be fine OP. Far better for you to get the rest you need!

Monkeyssplit · 16/05/2019 17:43

Better to be at nursery than home with parents with a bad vomiting bug.
Also, that's desparate if it is normal for children to be in nursery from 7am until 7pm day in day out as pp claimed. That's living there.

EverythingNow · 16/05/2019 17:44

It is what it is. Lots of babies do that as standard. My dd went fulltime 8-5.30 5 days a week from about 14wks old. I didn't have a choice as I had to work. She was fine.
It's great that you have that option when you're unwell.

kaytee87 · 16/05/2019 17:44

Yanbu op.

Also ignore pp there's no need to keep a child off because someone else is ill. That's ridiculous.

DerelictWreck · 16/05/2019 17:48

It's nursey, not prison! 50 hours of interactive play and supervised care is not a bad thing

powershowerforanhour · 16/05/2019 17:55

DH and I were ill for several days a couple of months back and on DDs non-nursery days, we had to let her binge watch Peppa all day and take it in turns to get her water, food and take her to the loo, according to who felt least-worst at the time. She didn't get what we had but if we had the opportunity to pile her into nursery the extra days we would have. It's not as intense as school and they can have a sleep in the afternoon there if they need to.

Unihorn · 16/05/2019 17:56

Definitely not being unreasonable, she'll have much more fun there than home with you not being able to play!

Also 8am-5.30pm is definitely not the same as 7am-7pm. Presumably the latter involves waking and dressing children at 6am and putting them straight to bed when you get home with absolutely no time spent with them for 5 days. Those extra 10+ hours through the week would make a difference.

HomeMadeMadness · 16/05/2019 17:58

It would have to be a fairly awful nursery for me to keep my DC home in that situation.

DocusDiplo · 16/05/2019 18:00

Depends if the nursery is nice and she is happy going there. Personally I would prefer the child to be with me and bored than in a nursery but its up to you what you do. I think kids prefer to be at home with parents, even if it is a slightly substandard service :D I hope you get better , illness is horrible.

Charmlight · 16/05/2019 18:02

If you’ve been vomiting for 4 days, you may need to see a Doctor. You could be dehydrated and risking an acute kidney injury.

JagerPlease · 16/05/2019 18:05

Not unreasonable at all. I would say not even unreasonable if it happened every week, but then again my DS is in childcare minimum of 40 hours a week as standard over 4 days because of work. So long as you've chosen childcare where your child is happy and looked after, then I don't see the problem

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 16/05/2019 18:12

You are absolutely not unreasonable she knows nursery, you have paid for it and she's having a great time in an environment where she is being nurtured and looked after.

I think kids prefer to be at home with parents, even if it is a slightly substandard service

14 month old children do not think like this. She is likely to be bored shitless staring at episodes of peppa pig at home and much more likely to get poorly. She wont understand properly why mummy and daddy don't want to play with her.

Why would anyone put a child through the misery of being stuck inside with 2 sick parents when they could be at nursery having a lovely time whilst mummy and daddy rest and recover?

Tawdrylocalbrouhaha · 16/05/2019 18:16

I'd send her in for sure. If you had a full time job she'd be there anyway, there's nothing remotely unusual about it.

dippydeedoo · 16/05/2019 18:19

I’m a nursery nurse although not working in that field at the moment and I absolutely think you’re doing the best thing.
She’s at nursery she’s cared for and nurtured with qualified staff and peers essentially another ‘family’.
She’s not stuck at home with poorly parents and at risk of picking up the virus too.

Original poster
riotlady · 16/05/2019 18:22

Thank you, everyone, I feel much better. The nursery is really fab and she loves it there, so it definitely is more fun than we are right now!

OP posts:
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