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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To keep dp away from ds?

30 replies

Bettyhop · 15/05/2019 02:05

Ds is 6 days old. Dp has started this evening with an upset stomach and diahorrea. I've tried looking around Google but can find no information on whether ds needs to be kept away from him. He is breastfed but i really rely on his support for feeding, winding and cuddles etc as I am 100% sleep deprived 😬 advice please!

OP posts:
DangerMouse17 · 15/05/2019 02:09

Yes I would. Schools and nurseries usually ask for kids to be kept away until that sort of thing has gone, as very contagious.

OmarKhayyam · 15/05/2019 02:11

Definitely needs to be kept away. And DP needs to be using fastidious and hand hygiene wit anti-bacterial soap every time he goes to the toilet or vomits. Regular wiping down of the toilet flush, bathroom taps, etc as well.

Alicewond · 15/05/2019 02:12

Doesn’t matter if he is related or not, if he has a bug he shouldn’t be near a newborn. Same would be for you,

Purpleartichoke · 15/05/2019 02:23

Doesn’t matter if he is related or not, if he has a bug he shouldn’t be near a newborn. Same would be for you,

That is completely untrue. If mom is sick the newborn has already been exposed. Baby needs to keep breastfeeding for nutrition, hydration, and all those precious antibodies that mom will be creating. Separating them could do real harm.

Original poster
Bettyhop · 15/05/2019 02:30

Okay thank you. I agree with the consensus of keeping him away. What about being in the same bed as us? Should he stop all cuddles etc with ds? Will remind him of hygiene when he wakes up. I'm not sure I can do this alone.

OP posts:
Complainingagain · 15/05/2019 02:39

He should stop all cuddles yes, until a couple of days after he's stopped showing symptoms.

He should probably sleep in another bed if possible.

RightYesButNo · 15/05/2019 02:48

Think of immune system strength as going from 1 to 100. Your DS has a strength of 1, essentially. You really need to quarantine DH away from you and DS, if you’re not sick yet, and if that’s possible in your house, and keep DH in just one room. So, no, don’t share a bed, and no, no cuddles. If this is evolving norovirus or something, the only thing that kills it is bleach, so having your DH wash his hands before cuddling DS would not be enough at all.

Now, with that said, you mention DH has an upset stomach and diarrhea. Do you mean he has diarrhea and vomiting? If so, yes, quarantine. Keep DS away. Wipe all surfaces and handles (door, toilet) down with BLEACH-based antibacterial spray or wipes (Domestos does a bleach spray I believe or you can just mix bleach and water in a spray bottle) as regular antibacterial sprays will not kill norovirus (just in case that’s what you’re facing). If you have two bathrooms, just “give” him one bathroom and you stay out of it for now. IF he just has diarrhea and his stomach feels unsettled, there’s still a chance something he ate wasn’t “good,” and he won’t be sick in a contagious way. Unfortunately, it may be impossible to tell, so I would err on the side of caution. If he doesn’t vomit, though, it’s somewhat less serious.

Flyingkites123 · 15/05/2019 02:52

Keep baby away. Hope it passes soon

NunoGoncalves · 15/05/2019 02:53

If he is sleeping in the same bed as you both then you will both likely catch it I would have thought.

Alicewond · 15/05/2019 02:58

@Purpleartichoke have you ever worked in a hospital? No if mum was infected she would be advised to keep away too. Antibodies only work if it’s an known and already defeated Illness. If it’s new to the mum it’s new to the child

Original poster
Bettyhop · 15/05/2019 03:03

He's not yet vomited but has had 3 episodes diahorrea and foul smelling wind😷 he feels well in himself, no stomach ache or nausea. I have moved into the spare room with ds and will use the downstairs loo for now. Ds will not entertain his basket at all so we were taking it in turns settling him after feeds, this motherhood thing is relentless!😁

OP posts:
Original poster
Bettyhop · 15/05/2019 03:05

@alicewond so would you suggest formula feeding my baby if I became symptomatic? That seems really disruptive to establishing breastfeeding. Also if we should both be quarantined from him, who should care for him? He needs his mum.

OP posts:
81Byerley · 15/05/2019 03:13

Continue breast feeding if you get it. Just be scrupulous about hygiene.

SnowyAlpsandPeaks · 15/05/2019 03:23

Keep breastfeeding, don’t stop. Just remember good hygiene practices. And yes keep dp away, no cuddles, kisses etc, and make sure he’s washing his hands properly. Also keep any visitors away or it will spread.

GenevaJoey · 15/05/2019 03:36

Definitely keep breastfeeding. We had a stomach bug in our house when baby was a few days old. My midwife said it was very rare for breadtfed babies to get any gastro bugs when they were little: (everyone in house got ill apart from baby)

www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/pregnancy/is-it-safe-to-breastfeed-if-i-have-diarrhoea-and-vomiting/

kellymom.com/bf/can-i-breastfeed/illness-surgery/mom-illness/

The most important thing is trying to avoid getting it yourself as likely baby will be fine. Make dp sleep on sofa and keep everything v clean. No fun breastfeeding while you have gastro.

Good luck, you'll be fine Wink

Alicewond · 15/05/2019 03:41

@Bettyhop your choice, will hope the babe is immune to what you aren’t, best wishes

MrsTerryPratchett · 15/05/2019 03:41

I was told that you develop antibodies to illnesses you are exposed to and they pass to the baby through your milk. So BFing is good, not bad. And formula just introduces another way to get tummy bugs into your child.

I was never told that BFing mothers should avoid their babies. Hmm

Original poster
Bettyhop · 15/05/2019 03:53

Thank you for all of the helpful advice.
@Alicewond I'm still struggling to work out what you would suggest I did with my baby if I was to become unwell? Drop him off at grandma's for 48 hours of formula? Take him to a children's home...???🤔

OP posts:
Alicewond · 15/05/2019 04:01

Good luck to you and your baby @Bettyhop honestly xxx. I wish the best for you both x

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 15/05/2019 04:18

Apart from anything else, the initial bonding with a caregiver is really important. So no, week-old babies shouldn't be away from their mothers unless it's vitally important.

StoppinBy · 15/05/2019 04:24

Your body will start to make antibodies before you even know you are sick, so baby will receive those antibodies too and hopefully not get too bad of a case if they get sick.

If you do get sick being as baby is so little it will be especially important to try and keep up your fluids to keep your body making milk but don't stop feeding your baby simply based on being sick.

I can't imagine any hospitals telling you to avoid breastfeeding a fully breast fed baby based on being ill unless baby has a compromised immune system and then that has it's own considerations which are not present in most people's lives.

Original poster
Bettyhop · 15/05/2019 07:00

Thanks everyone. We seem to be ok for now. Daddy feeling slightly better this morning too x

OP posts:
SnuggyBuggy · 15/05/2019 07:05

For the record OP me and DH have had sickness bugs when our DD was a young baby and we didn't pass them on to her. DH didn't quarantine himself.

QueenofmyPrinces · 15/05/2019 07:25

OP - absolutely keep breast feeding your babies, don’t listen to silly suggestions that you shouldn’t.

I’m glad your DP seems a bit better Flowers