To worry there are not enough free weekly events for mums or dads and their babies in UK

[Mammajay]

I just visited my local library and it was chock full of baby buggies and the children's section was packed to the doorway with mums and their babies ( didn't see any dads). I commented to the librarian about how essential such events were when my children were babies. He replied that this was that second session today and that there had been 50 mums at the earlier session. To be honest they were both so crowded that mums standing at the back probably won't have fully enjoyed it. So I googled free mum and baby stuff in my area but most were private charged for events in church halls. So, what is on offer where you are? I had no parental or family support and didn't belong to a church but the library and local mother and toddler groups put on by various churches in their halls were wonderfully supportive.

Why does it need to be free? These things cost money to run

There are loads of free groups where I live, you dont have to belong to any particular church to join in.

They aren't free though. Somewhere down the line, someone has to pay for it and council budgets are far too stretched to pay for baby groups. There are lots and lots of groups around my area which are between £1 and £2.50 and that seems to be the best they can do.

Maybe you could start one.

Someone has to fund it somewhere though. Even if it’s free at point of delivery that doesn’t stop costs being involved.

I think the library one is the only free one that I’m aware of in my area. Baby massage, baby groups, baby sensory, baby swimming etc all costs but not very much tbh. They still have overheads to consider, nothing in life is free as they say!

IMO there is TONS for very young children where I live (libraries sessions, museums sessions, childrens centres, playgroups -overwhelming options, all free or £2 max) Also lots of microbusinesses and franchises for classes etc.

There is a whole lot less for older children, it seems, it gets very specialised into dance and sport activities. And bugger all when you get to early teens.

Tonnes of stuff when mine were babies and toddlers that were cheap or free.

Are you suggesting these should be subsidised by the government? Should it take priority over, for example, the NHS or school funding?

Why don’t you run a free class then and cover all the overheads for it?

Just doing free stuff isn’t necessarily the best use of funding.

Easy for the parent who is confident around people, confident getting out with their baby, already looking for events, English speaking, wealthy enough to have a car / get transport to it etc to just hoover up the events.

So you end up giving people who don’t need it the freebies whilst a marginalised EAL mum with the screaming reflux baby who is intimidated by yummy mummies gets stuck at home.

I’d rather limited funding targeted those mothers.

I get that a free activity can also bring some of them in... and I’m not an expert so I can’t say how effective or not it is.

But I went to loads of free activities when mine were young, and there were loads of people who went straight from that to expensive baby ballet and coffee with “the NCT girls”.

I worry more about which people access services that do exist, than adding more.

I don't think it's reasonable to expect all these things for free. Some things in life are a necessity but fun, free events for kids and parents aren't one of them.

Who's responsibility should it be to organise and fund them?

OP when you say 'free' are you including groups that charge £1.50 ish or not? I dont think a couple of quid is unreasonable to pay. We even have soft pay for £2 in our small town.

There’s not much available for free around here. Think it’s just the breastfeeding support club at the children’s centre.

I have heard about a fab sounding group about 30mins away though. It’s for 0-4 and run by an old people’s home. It’s mostly involving singing nursery rhymes with actions etc and then a cup of tea with the residents after. Apparently spending time watching the children enjoy themselves is the highlight of a lot of the residents weeks

Also loads of the toddler groups won't show up on Google, especially not if you Google 'free'. They tend to be listed in their own listings or ones that bloggers have put together. Sometimes it's all done through word of mouth and Facebook groups. I was surprised at how much was going on that Google didn't show.

In 22 years of being a mum nothing was completely free. Toddler groups cost a pound or 2. If you want free stuff go to the park.

Anyway I live in a village with a town close by and there are about 3 things to choose from every day within 10 mins drive

We have a fantastic children's centre near us with at least 2 sessions a weeks that run for free which would be suitable for my age child. There are more for younger children too, plus loads of health visitor drop in clinics and breast feeding support.
I feel really lucky to have this so close, no idea where I would be without it!

I meant free or cheap so that they are inclusive. I am going to speak to my friend about a group.

I don't know about now as my children are older but when they were little there were things on every day either free or £1 per family. It's things locally for dc with disabilities that I struggle with. My disabled son wants to play football. Football club for non disabled children is 5 minute drive away. Football club for children with disabilities is 1 hour drive away. I know it's because of supply and demand but it's frustrating that I have to go that far just so that my son can be on a football team.

My point is that it can be very lonely to be a new mum. 90 mums crowding into the link brary suggests that new mums might be short of stuff to go to.

Sad fact is that these things cost money. The best groups are the ones that charge a nominal fee but rely on volunteers - usually in a community building like a church or hall. Speaking with best intentions, I intend to volunteer at the one my dd attends.

It’s a big undertaking but you could see about starting one yourself - approach a venue and maybe seek support from your local children’s centre to gather help/interest. It’s a lot to take on with a small baby though and I suspect like most people the issue will fall off your radar as your dc get older. That’s not a dig, it’s just to illustrate why it’s so patchy in areas.

There are a wide range of free library sessions in our area, a number of churches who offer non religious activities for children for a small donation, the local council swimming sessions are £3.00 for toddler and adult with soft play afterwards and again the local council gymnastics lessons are £2.50 or £3.50 if you want to use the soft play afterwards.

There is a good range of low cost activities in my immediate area. In the city centre there are free or low cost library and museum activities but they work out a lot more expensive by the time you add in traveling costs.

And going to the park on your own might not help a lonely mum.