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Original poster

Should i sever ties?

62 replies

Sparkydad88 · 13/05/2019 17:43

Hi Everyone.

My stepdaughter will be 15 in a couple of weeks and i have been her step-dad since she was 7.

We are constantly falling out about stuff and over the last 12 months or so other than for money or a lift we don’t really communicate in any meaningful kind of way.

Our latest fall out was because both me and mum are on her snapchat and i must have accidentally screenshotted a picture of her with her friend she had posted onto her story and she basically wouldn’t accept that i had no knowledge of this and it had been accidental. She accused me of purposely collecting pictures of her and said i was weird before deleting me from her snapchat.

Now as a man and as a father this really has cut deep and has kind of crossed a line for me that makes me uncomfortable living under the same roof. If she believes that is the kind of person i am then what am i doing here. It’s the worst thing in the world in my opinion.

I overheard mum harassing her to say sorry a few times during the course of yesterday and a did get a quick sorry text that was only sent to appease her mum. I tried to explain to her in my reply back how hurtful and simply untrue her accusations had been and i said that to feel the need remove me from her social media she really must believe that i’m some kind of weirdo to which she didn’t deny she just said ‘ok’. I asked if she’d feel more comfortable if I wasn’t around anymore and she just said she wasn’t really bothered.

I’m now struggling to stop myself from packing my bags, but of course this punishes my wife and my young son who have done nothing wrong. Do you think the answer is to sever my relationship totally with my stepdaughter and have nothing to do with her. There is no getting through to her.... she is right and i am wrong in her mind and she’ll keep up that belief for a very long time (stubborn like her mum). We’re due to move house soon and i’m now thinking of not going with them as i can’t stand the dynamics anymore.

I’m in a real pickle here and don’t know how to handle this...... any help?

OP posts:
Original poster
Sparkydad88 · 14/05/2019 15:41

Update.

I have apologised to my teen and although at the moment she is ignoring my text (she is away for a few days with my wife) i will wait for her to calm down and come back to me.

OP posts:
GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 14/05/2019 15:45

How does her Mother feel about you threatening to 'sever all ties' with a stropped 14-year old kid?

What happens if your DS starts playing up in future; will you sever ties with him too?

Part of being a parent (and a step-parent) of a teenager is picking your battles. You don't get to throw your own tantrum in return.

Thatsashame · 14/05/2019 15:53

I dotn understand your steo daughter.... collecting photos of her... isnt that what parents do? I have 100s of photos. Sometimes dh puts a photo on his facebook and i like it and we both work and dont have time to message photos. So i acreen shot it. By the evening j would have forgotten to ask him.

I dont understand what snap what has to do with it or whether you did or not..m.its iust a weird accusation. Saying that shes a teen....

Thatsashame · 14/05/2019 15:53

My screen is craccked. Sorry abiut typos

FireflyEden · 14/05/2019 21:53

@Dyrne I have an iPhone and you screenshot holding the home button and power off button, which is the opposite side of the phone to the volume button, so I cannot see how you can literally do this without knowing.

@Sparkydad88 If your SD came to me and disclosed you were keeping photos of her against her consent, and she felt it was inappropriate, I would duty bound have to report you to the Police and SS.

Dyrne · 14/05/2019 21:56

FireflyEden the iPhone X screenshots by using the power/lock button and the volume control button. When my thumb goes up to lock the phone, usually my fingers curl round and often hit the volume up button at the same time. If you google it you’ll see it’s a pretty well known issue.

FireflyEden · 14/05/2019 22:06

@Dyrne fair enough I apologise, as for the OP, he is now under a new username slating his SD off for not returning a text after her uncles funeral.

Nomorepies · 14/05/2019 22:07

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on the poster's request.

Ayemama · 14/05/2019 22:12

Oh god when my niece was 14/15 she was a living nightmare! Her step dad was public enemy number one even though he was and is great to her.
Seriously don’t see why you’d endanger a relationship over a teenager being a teenager

Dippypippy1980 · 14/05/2019 22:44

How does she know you took a screenshot?

You don’t sound very mature. You are arguing with a child and threatening to leave your family because a child called you weird?

FudgeBrownie2019 · 21/05/2019 11:33

he is now under a new username slating his SD off for not returning a text after her uncles funeral.

Because a giant man baby never changes; they just move on to the next complaint.

PanamaPattie · 21/05/2019 11:53

As if.

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