Escape to the Country

[MatthewBramble]

This is utter bollocks isn't it. They never buy any of the houses shown, there's a boring bit in the middle about local "crafts" or what have you and the "mystery" house is always totally unsuitable in one way oe another.

Kirstie and Phil could have re-housed a small town in the time these idiots waste on bugger all.

All the couples are beyond picky, and yes, the local craft stuff is cringe, and all the recapping is beyond frustrating.

I dont think I have ever seen an episode where they buy something. They always want to go away and think about it.

I also think that if you go on Location, Location, Location! there must be a clause in the contract that you will try and buy at least one of the properties. I have never seen an episode where they dont.

I agree Cantfindname - really annoys me, particularly when it is on the News!!

'Emelia illustrates children's books and Tristan is a water sommelier. They have a massive trust fund budget of £900k.'

I'm glad we're not the only ones who find this a bit nauseating.

This thread is so funny

This week it's reality week on Escape to the Country and we are helping two couples to find the home of our dreams.

Couple 1 are newly retired and are struggling with their relationship so need a home with a large kitchen for the little woman of the house to endlessly bake cakes for local craft fairs and a shed for her husband to pretend to do some unusual hobby so they don't need to meet. They have a huge budget because they are avid skiers - yes, that's right viewers, they are spending their kids inheritance.

Couple 2 have a large budget but refuse to explain how they got it. Millicent, who wears the trousers in this relationship, wants home with a large craft studio where she can develop her unique talent of basket weaving with llama hair whilst her husband needs space for his hobby of model train photography which he likes to do when he won't be commuting over the Internet to his job publicising their new llama walking business.

Love the show but also find it annoying that they never seem to buy a property.

I love House Hunters too and then discovered they only get people on who are already purchasing a house and the rest is faked.

I always think that if they were looking at those areas and had a particular budget, then they would have seen the houses offered to them already 🤷‍♀️

So many annoyances with that programme:

1. Here's a house with a kitchen the size of the Albert Hall - ooh no its faaaarrrrr too small, how would I get the fridge in?

1. We want a house with a large garden - here's one with 3 acres - ooh no its too big!

1. We're a couple in our 60s with no children, we absolutely must have 17 bedrooms and 12 bathrooms.

1. Our budget is £750k - ooh look at this house we've found for you, it's on the market for £3.5 million.

Etc etc etc...

I may have exaggerated slightly ^

My Mum appeared on one episode.... the couple were house hunting locally, and they came into the market town where Mum works to film. There is a startling lack of shops if you don't count the convenience stores, takeaways and charity shops... so they pounced on Mum. She said they were in there for nearly 2 hours filming and chatting.... she was on screen for around 30 seconds and was most put out after she'd told everyone she knew . She did say that the presenter (Jonnie Irwin) smelt lovely and was very charming though!

They didn't buy the house though - it's a gorgeous one but in a really crap location and is still on the market about 5 years on.

They always want to go away and think about it.

Or even more stupid, they are interested in one of the houses but they now have to put their current house on the market. 🤷‍♀️

I enjoy seeing the houses, and try to ignore the rest.

I think what it is Lakielady it’s when the couple have come from a 3 bed semi and then moan that the 7 bed detached with a kitchen the size of centre court complain that the house is too small, most couples on ETTC are upsizers rather than downsizers.

I imagine if DH and I were on ETTC everyone would think how dull we are. However DH has no more tact than a tea cup so he would be deliberately banging his head on low beams and yelling dramatically.
I always laugh when they show a house with old fashioned decor but perfectly decent and they need £30K to redecorate. It's always far nicer than my decrepit old farmhouse. Jules is the only real country person and shows his frustration with picky people.

I watch A Place In The Sun / Winter Sun on Channel 4.
So often people say they want to entertain family who will visit them. So all 27 of them are coming to stay in the one bedroom apartment you're buying hmm

This. They all want "space to entertain", when the harsh reality is, their kids and grandkids will visit the first year they're in, then once every 8 years after that (if they're lucky) as they'll figure out they want their own holidays elsewhere and don't want to go sleep on a rollout bed in the middle of a kitchen/diner in Costa Del Sol.

I think Alistair gets fed up with some couples as well, I will never forget the episode where a lady complained about there being a table in the kitchen as she did not like tables in kitchens! Alistair could barely contain his frustration!

My next door neighbours were on 'Home or Away'...was that what it was called?...where couples are asked to choose between buying in this country or abroad?...anyway filmed with Jonny Urwin

Talking to them, they were offered this through their estate agent. They never had any thoughts of staying at 'home' but had to,pick somewhere random. Both at 'home and away' they were taken to houses that were at least £100,000 out of budget so totally pointless. They said the whole thing was very rushed, two days abroad dashing from property to property. ( that they couldn't afford to buy!)

Filming at their own house for the introduction didn't all actually happen at their own house either. Johnny Urwin was filmed in a neighbours garden but pretending it was theirs.

They were the most BORING couple on the show, no idea why they were chosen as they are truly boring in real life too

That home or Away one - is it still on? - always made me laugh.

The wife usually wanted something in this country that they and the family could use at weekends, and the husband wanted abroad because you get more for your money.
They would be shown some poky little house in Devon that cost a fortune then a much larger house in Spain or Portugal where they could enjoy a glass of wine on the terrace. All thoughts of the weekend visits and family went out the window.
Often the house was up a steep mountain track in the middle of nowhere and I'm sure in the cold light of day many withdrew their offer.

My favorites are the ones who turn down the first two OK looking houses because the kitchen is too small (or something similar) then get shown the very pretty chocolate box cottage and rave about the not-much-more-than-a-galley type kitchen that is half the size the others were.

And the ones who are looking for their retirement "forever home" who fall in love with a house with umpteen steps before you even get to the front door, a garden on a slope that mountain goats would have a problem with, the only decent sized bedroom on the second or third floor in the loft with steep stairs, down the end of a knackered donkey track. I can assure you that arthritis (a common illness in retired people) and steep stairs just don't go together!

And very few of them seem to understand that they aren't the only ones who want the advantages of "edge of a village" houses, so these WILL be more expensive than those out in the wilds or in a town.

I also can't get the thing about being horrified at the idea of single level homes (AKA bungalows) or the master bedroom being on the ground floor. I saw one episode where a house had another large en suite bedroom on the first floor, but that didn't seem to be considered as it wasn't the "master" bedroom of the current occupants.

Its not as bad as A Place in the Sun - where couples often want to spend several hundred thousand on a villa in the Caribbean but confess they have never been there before. Just why?!

I noticed that too TheChineseChicken.

If I was to go on such a program it would only be because I hope they had some sort of inside info on a particular type of house- why else otherwise?

My neighbours were on it, they did indeed buy (the mystery house too!) and didn’t have a massive budget (about £400k) it was, however, a compete work of fantasy, they didn’t live in The part of London they claimed and the reasons for moving etc were all made up, and it was full of constant false humble brags, but the reason they went on is they literally wanted to escape to the country and knew absolutely nothing about the county they’d chosen. So I guess they genuinely needed the help?

Cracking comment on A Place In The Sun the other day. Couple looking for a flat/ house in Spain or somewhere similar, 2 beds if poss, not overlooked, pool etc, the usual.
They saw an amazing apartment, it truly was gorgeous BUT....... when they went to look at the COMMUNAL pool, they wouldn't think of buying it as there was too many other flats and people would be looking at them.
There was a few properties where they would be " looked at" if in the pool, what the hell were they gonna do in the pool that people would be staring at them? They were a bit concerned about some of the nearby beaches, too many people and they'd be looked at ( again, why?)
Very odd.

And the ludicrous budgets!

When we were buying some of the houses in our budget turned up as potentioal holiday homes on a programme like this, put us in our place!