Or is DP regarding cleaning?

[Bobcat249]

So DP wakes up this morning and decides today will be productive. That’s great for him. I say I’m having a relaxing day off. (We don’t have kids) he did try call me lazy in a half joking way but I said I can spend my weekends how I want if I work all week.

He’s exercised and started cleaning and come and up to the bedroom to delegate jobs. I told him I’d do things I needed to do at some point today but will do them when I do them. The morning has gone on and I can hear him getting increasingly annoyed I I asked him if he was bothered I wasn’t up yet. He said no but I heard him say ‘you could help’ aa he walked away. So I’m annoyed at this point and said I will do my cleaning In my own time and not on his schedule and just because he’s cleaning I’m not going to jump out of bed and do the same.

AIBU or is he? I had two days off this week mind and spend 9 hours each day Scrubbing his house and doing jobs.

His house?

And you've already spent two days doing housework?

You won't be doing that again then will you?

Personally I would get up and take myself out for a walk or a coffee and leave him too it, its his choice to clean

His house? That'll be his cleaning then. I might make lunch and clean that up, that'd be it.
(I've come to bed with DS for naptime. I like naptime a lot.)

Sorry! this house. Typo!

Well in that case you'd have been better off relaxing the other days and cleaning together today.

However as you've already done your bit he is BVU

9 hours each day cleaning?! How bad was the house before?

It sounds like he's only interested in doing it now cos you've done most of the work lol

Also it's the weekend and you don't have kids. Now is the time to lie in cos if you ever do have kids, that won't happen again for a long time!

I now count 7am as having a lie in 😂

DS is having his lunch now and yawning. I'm hoping he'll want to nap later so I can 😄

What does your house look like that 18 hours of scrubbing wasn't enough?

I'd take a leaf from his book and don't clean when he's not around. Only Performance Cleaning from now on. With an audience.

It depends, was he wanting to get everything done this morning so that you could do something nice together this afternoon?
Although even if that is the case then you should have both agreed to it.

Why the bleeding heck have you spent 18 hours cleaning?!

18 hours? Really?

Just this week or every week?

If you've cleaned for 18 hours this week, it's his turn for the next month

DP does this too; he'll wake up and start cleaning and get annoyed if I don't jump out of bed to join him

Tell him you will 'help' once he has done his 18 hours of jobs as you have already done yours.

18 hours of cleaning??? That doesn't seem right unless the house was disgusting before. If you cleaned that much what exactly is he doing?

My Ex used to do nothing for months and left me to do all the housework. Then for no apparent reason would take a notion to clean something and got huffy if I a/ didnt give him a medal, and b/ didnt clean something at the same time! Tell him to F Off and have a cuppa!

18 hours of cleaning this week already? Wow. Either you have unbelieveably high standards of cleanliness or a toddler and a large dog :)

9 hours? A day? 😳

18 hours of cleaning already this week?! What on earth still needs doing?!!!

9 hours a day cleaning is weird, there would be nothing left to clean! I’d help him clean, it’s quicker with two doing it at the same time. I couldn’t sit in bed and not help myself.

It would take me no more than 3 hours to thoroughly clean my whole house. 18 hours is very excessive!
That being said me and my DP clash sometimes as he likes to get up early and be very productive at weekends and I sometimes need time to myself to sleep in and just chill with my books or watch TV. It can be difficult finding a happy compromise with stuff like that but we usually just leave the other to it

9 hours cleaning, he expects you to do a fortnight's worth in a day?

Why would he need to clean again already if you've spent that amount of time this week cleaning? Unless of course you didn't spend much time cleaning after all and the place is a tip. I'd agree that your time was your own only you've had 2 days off so I think having had a lie in you should be joining in.

I like getting the boring stuff stuff out of the way and then relaxing, as it feels like something's been accomplished and there is nothing weighing on my mind as Needing To Be Done, so I want to crack on first thing and relax afterwards.

I do find it incredibly annoying if I'm up cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms (I call it Saturday Morning Rage Cleaning) and DP is still in bed - mainly because that means, after my morning has been spent doing stuff I just don't like doing, my afternoon is then wasted whilst he potters about and, naturally, he's too tired and wants to relax in the evening/not do anything. I do feel that I get more done in the morning by having the goal of finishing it and then having nothing outstanding than by lazing about for hours and then slowly getting up.

Had he said that he'd do things when he wanted I wouldn't have appreciated it much, not because I want to dictate the timings of his life, but because we don't get much time together and I'd rather be enjoying the majority of my day off with him, not losing the entire thing. As it is, we reached a compromise, which is I do what I feel I need to first thing, but I go and get him up once I've had enough/want a break/help with something.

He's away this weekend (was last week and will be for the next month), but today, it's clear he's done a lot of work in the week, as I only spent half an hour in there today - I'm feeling a lot more chilled about it.

Can you imagine the replies if the roles were reversed!!!!

I only clean when I know I'm getting visitors and as I rarely entertain that would be......rarely.