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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

My neighbour is painting my garden wall!

56 replies

viccat · 10/05/2019 14:36

Just looked out of the window to see my neighbour from two doors down painting my front garden wall! AIBU to think this is really weird? (Albeit probably done with the best of intentions...)

I live in a terraced Victorian house with a white painted front garden wall at the front. For what it's worth, I take care of the appearance of my house at the front with window boxes and plant pots, get windows cleaned, and had the wall and my window sills etc. re-painted 3 years ago so they are not exactly looking terrible. The paint has worn down a bit in the rain and London pollution but compared to some houses on the street was looking just fine.

This neighbour is generally obsessed with the appearance of our bit of the street - often sweeping the pavement, putting everyone's bins back into front gardens etc.

But surely you knock first before starting to paint a wall that doesn't belong to you?!

OP posts:

MrsFogi · 10/05/2019 15:07

Hopefully your next thread will not be - my neighbour has just presented me with a bill for paint and labour....

HolesinTheSoles · 10/05/2019 15:09

I'd probably just be happy and thank him but yes it's odd to do it without even asking!

Chouetted · 10/05/2019 15:09

Well I was going to suggest he'd gotten a bit carried away with his paintingv and forgotten to stop, but then I read that he's two doors down and didn't do the bit in-between

If he's doing a good job, I'd pop out, thank him profusely and offer him a cup of tea.

Then mention politely that it gave you a bit of a surprise...

theemmadilemma · 10/05/2019 15:10

I had some paint left when doing something similar and did the neighbors. I did ask first though!!

Noobcrumble · 10/05/2019 15:10

aprilshowers... My neighbour asked if she could cut my hedge back and wouldn’t take no for an answer! I was very grateful but it also made me feel like an incapable child!

SnowdropFox · 10/05/2019 15:10

Very enthusiastic of him! Hopefully he now doesn't pop round with the bill for the paint!

TheLoneWolfDies · 10/05/2019 15:15

Aw I think thats a lovely thing to do, I don't think its cheeky at all once its the same colour as it was 😁

SarahAndQuack · 10/05/2019 15:16

People are weird.

The last place I lived in, we had a narrow side-access passage that we used to take our bin from the back garden to the street. You could get into it by wiggling through the back garden of the house behind, too, though there wasn't any particular reason you would and it was on the deeds for our house. New people moved in and I woke up one day to heard a snipping sound and found a woman peeking over the gate and trimming the jasmine growing over our trellis, about four foot from my kitchen window. She wouldn't even have been able to see the passage from her own house, let alone see where there was jasmine growing along the side of it!

TheLoneWolfDies · 10/05/2019 15:16

That was supposed to be a smily face, oops

RavenLG · 10/05/2019 15:20

It's hard to know how to say thanks so much, really appreciate that AND next time please ask me first before you start...

Can you maybe say something about "if you're happy to paint it let me know first and I'll get the paint in" but then that might seem presumptuous he would actually do it again lol.

TheCouncilDestroyedMyWall · 10/05/2019 15:20

I'd keep quiet if it's saved you a job! Pretend you didn't notice...

UtterlyUnimaginativeUsername · 10/05/2019 15:23

Wait till he's finished and then ask him to ask next time!

samsamsamsamsamsam · 10/05/2019 15:23

I know it seems nice but its actually quite controlling and judgemental. and takes away your choice.

What would have happened if he had damaged it? or if you were thinking of stipping it back to brick?

Lellochip · 10/05/2019 15:27

I walked out my door the other week and realised that my entire back garden had been tidied and weeded by mine

(I didn't complain, it looked great!)

skybluee · 10/05/2019 15:28

That's really weird.
Can you imagine, just for a second, having some paint yourself and just going out there and starting to paint your neighbours wall without asking, just thinking oh I know, I'll start painting this?

Err no!

CherryPavlova · 10/05/2019 15:29

Good chap. A mug of tea would be in order.

jellyfish70 · 10/05/2019 15:29

I would go out. Just to see what he said. I'd say thanks but would you mind checking with us first because we might have had other plans, like painting it red!!??

jellyfish70 · 10/05/2019 15:32

My neighbour keeps trimming my hedge. It's not even a boundary hedge as they have a fence on their side (at the front of house) but our hedge is about 0.25m taller than their fence. We keep it trimmed however, not enough for them as they go and trim it before we get there. Had to have a word recently as we wanted the hedge taller, partly to stop them sing in our window! They are retired busy bodies.

RChick · 10/05/2019 15:40

I can imagine my dad doing something like this. Great intentions but doesn't actually think it all the way through.

TheWernethWife · 10/05/2019 15:42

I was selling my house and came home to find that my neighbour had painted her front garden wall (brick) with terracotta sandtex and carried on and painted mine. It looked horrible and her poor son was horrified and had to jet wash it off. When I asked what the bloody hell posessed her to do it, she said she thought she was doing me a favour.

rupple · 10/05/2019 15:50

I had a rather eccentric neighbour, she would do this type of thing frequently . I went into the garden once to see what she was doing to my front wall and she gently pushed me back down the path, into my hall and closed the front door.

MirandaGoshawk · 10/05/2019 15:55

Yes, it's weird. Some people just seem to want to be in control. All very well and saves you doing it - but what if it was something you didn't want done? I would nip it in the bud. Thank him politely but say you'll take care of anything else that needs doing.

I can see a neighbour of mine doing this. He has a chainsaw and itches to use it. He has cut back every shrub/hedge/tree in his garden to within an inch of its life. He has also ruined cut back the hedge owned by the council. The bit next to that is owned by me and I like it as it is, thanks very much. overgrown. Re the council's hedge he said "I'm just doing my bit". He is bound to start on my bit sooner or later and then he will get read the bloody riot act. It's not his to mess around with!

SoupDragon · 10/05/2019 15:59

I accidentally painted my neighbour's wall once. In my defence, it was the dividing wall and exactly the same style as my front wall (and, crucially, completely different to his!). He didn't mind. Apparently the previous owner "accidentally" knocked it down during building works and had it rebuilt. Rebuilt to match his own front wall 🤔

m4rdybum · 10/05/2019 15:59

Is he going to expect any money?

PutyourtoponTrevor · 10/05/2019 16:00

He wouldn't be getting any money from me, he took it upon himself to do it without permission

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