@katiehereornot
Do you think if I just wait a couple of weeks he might get bored texting her? I really like him and don't want to be too hasty as nothing has went on. We've only been together 5 weeks so it is quite new.
Hi dear, I haven't read the whole thread so I if there has been updates, I apologise for being behind. My concern from reading your thread is that I would be more bothered about my (your) attitude towards this than how he is or is not acting. You cannot control him, he will do whatever he wants and his actions are not happening because you are lower than him or that you do not deserve him!
I really hate it when girls write statements like this above because where is your self-respect? He is flirting with another women, trying to engage in contact with her, talking about physical and romantic things with her and I am guessing the whole time he was texting her, he never mentioned you? 5 weeks or 5 years, that is not good behaviour and not the behaviour that any self-respecting women should put up with?
He is disrespecting you and this girl as she probably thinks she's about to start something up with a completely nice single guy! I cannot judge you because I used to be like this. I was so desperate (in my younger years) for love and a boyfriend that I would have cut my right arm off for love but it took me time to realise that you:
A) Need to love yourself and that includes respecting yourself and having deal breakers of what you will put up.
B) Realise that you are a smart, beautiful women, who has much going for her (I am assuming) and that any guy would be lucky to have you. You do not need to put up with this!
C) You only have one life and while your entertaining another second on a guy who does not respect you, you are missing out on the all men who will!
I know your relationship is new but all the more reason to not expect this behaviour. Your supposed to be in the new, loved up, honeymoon stage of a relationship. 5 years later, 2 kids, and a mortgage, I can get men getting tired and bored of the same old then (depending on circumstances!!) but never 5 weeks in unless he was never serious about you in the first place.
Perhaps you should not have looked at his phone but really you would not have done that if you truly trusted him in the first place? If I was you, I would dump his sorry ass and not even give him an explanation. He does not deserve your time! Tell him that the relationship was not what you expected and that you would rather be friends. Trust me, If you say that in a mature and calm way, he will be chasing you so fast that this girl will be history. If you be emotional and insecure then he will forget you.
I personally think that LTB should rarely be used on MN as its overused a lot but in this case please respect yourself!