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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To find this so very strange - baby in Asda?

68 replies

marniemoonie · 09/05/2019 20:49

Was in Asda today with DS1 (3) and DD2 (8) picking up some stuff for DC4 due in a few months. We were in the baby aisle and this mother came in with a baby (looked around 8 weeks) in a carseat in the trolley. The carseat wasn't strapped into the trolley, just in the cart. Even worse I had a quick glance down at baby and though it had a blanket on (looked very thin and seethrough) it was obvious the poor thing was in just a nappy underneath. It has been 5 degrees celcius in this area today and absolutley pissing it down. Mum saw me looking and gave me a bit of a rude look to which I responded "Your baby is lovely." and she just nodded and picked up some nappies before walking off. I see her again a few times throughout the shop and it bothered me very much. If it had been Summer the clothing wouldn't have been as worrying but there was also the issue of the loose carseat. I managed to bite my tongue and not say anything.

As we were leaving in the car I noticed the mum at the bus stop outside Asda holding the carseat and I felt so angry. It was so very cold. AIBU not to understand why she didn't just dress her child properly??? She herself looked pretty well made up so I somehow doubt she's so desperate she can't afford a few onesies and a baby coat. I can't stop thinking about that poor baby.

OP posts:

KatnissMellark · 09/05/2019 21:03

Erm baby definitely had a poo explosion- she was in the clothes aisle, duh!

Also, I've used to put DS car seat in the trolley, what's wrong with that? It's not going to suddenly sprout legs and jump out

comedycentral · 09/05/2019 21:04

I met with a friend once and her baby pooed allover the place. Tiny baby but so much poo! It was before I had kids and she, in her sleep daze had left the clothes at home. We had to peel them off the baby in costa coffee loo's then off we went to boots for spare clothes, nappies, wipes and a fresh blanket. Never seen such mess from one tiny human!!

So maybe this happened to this Mum too. Or maybe something wasn't quite right there.

DizzyPhillips · 09/05/2019 21:04

I used to pop the car seat into the trolley. I’m 5’3 and I couldn’t see over the top of the special car seat ones.

Onceuponacheesecake · 09/05/2019 21:05

Id assume she needed to buy a change of clothes.

I've never put the car seat on top of the trolley because I'm a short arse and can't see over the top. In fact I think most people would struggle to see over the top.

kaytee87 · 09/05/2019 21:05

I wouldn't worry about the car seat- what do you think was going to happen?
I reckon the baby had a poonami all over its clothes and mum nipped into Asda to buy spares.

SoyDora · 09/05/2019 21:05

Why would anyone take a baby in a car seat on the bus though? They’re bloody heavy to carry round!

mummyofdaughters · 09/05/2019 21:06

I've put newborn DDs in the car seat in the trolley when in the supermarket. Where else am I supposed to put them??

Also, you've no idea of their circumstances. Maybe the baby was running a fever and she was trying to cool her baby down? Or she was running to get a change of clothes? Or the baby had just grown out of their clothes and she couldn't yet afford the next size up but she's doing the best she can because life is fucking shit, especially if she was carrying the car seat to the bus stop - I guess she doesn't have money for a proper buggy. I feel for her, big time.

You, on the other hand, sound incredibly judgmental.

Whereistheglove · 09/05/2019 21:07

Yeah the concern is just oozing out of the op

Celebelly · 09/05/2019 21:07

This absolutely could have been me a couple of weeks ago. DD shat all over herself in the car and then again when I was changing her into the emergency clothes we have in changing bag. Luckily DP was there so he sat with her in car while I ran into Asda to buy new clothes, but if I had been on my own she would have been coming in in her nappy and a blanket over the top!

Passthecherrycoke · 09/05/2019 21:07

Maybe her car was in the garage or something and she was in her way to pick it up? Maybe she left her car parked somewhere and was taking the bus back to it

IHopeYouUnderstandWeArePuppets · 09/05/2019 21:08

The car seat thing is baffling me. I often do that withDC3, having done it with DCs 1 and 2. What is going to happen to the baby in that situation? Please enlighten me, as I’ll stop doing it if I’m missing some thing!

Also, I really doubt that walking about without baby being clad properly is usual. I guess something like PP have said upthread is more likely.

DizzyPhillips · 09/05/2019 21:08

The first time I tried the car seat trolley the things on the bottom of the car seat that grip the isofix base gripped the side of the trolley so the car seat was sideways, and I almost let go of m the car seat in surprise. I had a 2.5 year old trying to make a bid for freedom and I momentarily couldn’t remember how to get the car seat to release its grip. Thankfully a lovely man stopped to help me.

Spinnaret · 09/05/2019 21:09

I hated the trolleys with the car seat section on top. Being a short arse, I couldn't see round them to steer. Far safer for all to put the seat in the trolley.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 09/05/2019 21:09

All of mine would have gone about in the nip or lay nudey in pram
They quickly got hot,preferred being cool and actually yes just a blanket

Celebelly · 09/05/2019 21:10

Also don't get the issue with car seat in trolley. How is baby going to fall out of a high-sided car seat with a trolley going at like 0.5mph on flat terrain? I see people doing this all the time in supermarkets and have yet to see a baby flying out of the trolley across the store.

PhalangeReginaPhalange · 09/05/2019 21:10

My DC had to go round Tesco in a nappy and a light cardigan for the same reason people have said. If someone questioned me about my parenting at that point in tone I would absolutely tell them where to go

Wherearemycrayons · 09/05/2019 21:13

I take my baby in the car seat in normal trolleys all the time. The ones above the food are a pain in the arse as I can’t see over the top and I’m not short!
Probably a poo explosion but also perhaps a fever? Around 8 weeks is first jabs.

Posesinavase · 09/05/2019 21:14

I've many a time put my babies car seat in a trolley when there hadn't been an actual car seat trolley available. There is no need for it to be strapped in. The car seat particularly fills the trolley and can't fall out thr trolley.

The baby being naked isn't ideal but like what several pp have said baby has probs soiled their clothes so had to be stripped down.

Echobelly · 09/05/2019 21:14

My first thought was explosive poo when out and didn't have any spares on her - especially if baby is quite new and you haven't got your 'going out' mojo on yet.

NB, I took car seat on bus occasionally because until just before DC2 arrived, I couldn't drive, so with DC1, sometimes someone would drop me somewhere and I'd take the bus back, with baby in car seat

DulcieRay · 09/05/2019 21:14

I always put the car seat in the trolley
I didn't even know it was a thing not to?

MagicKingdomDizzy · 09/05/2019 21:15

YABU to have 4 children.

Lwmommy · 09/05/2019 21:15

This reminds me of the day DD threw up in one set of clothes, did a massive poo in her spare set of clothes then threw up again on her spare spare set of clothes. We were out in a big park about an hour from home and I 'fashioned' her an outfit from 2 Muslin cloths I found in the car boot.

Got some funny looks that day!

applesauce1 · 09/05/2019 21:15

I think it's probably safer having the car seat inside a trolley than with one of those flimsy straps on top of the other trolleys. I've done this a hundred times when the trolleys with baby seats are soaking wet from rain. I had no idea people like you were watching and judging me for it.

Recently, my baby projectile vomited over both of us at a baby group. We were both soaked. He was already in his spare pair of trousers so I had to leave the group with him in fresh nappy, clean vest and jumper and bare legs. I walked out of that class in completely see-through white jeans looking like I'd pissed myself, I was so wet with vomit.

Surely, after baby number 4, you know that sometimes, you aren't prepared and things are shit and you just have to pull yourself together and get on with it, hoping that people will be understanding?

Fatted · 09/05/2019 21:15

I still remember an old bat who worked in Asda on day asking me why on earth my child didn't have any shoes on with a look of disdain. He wasn't even a year old yet, not walking yet and was sat in the bloody trolley! Why would he need shoes?!

MacrosomicMumma · 09/05/2019 21:16

It's ok to be concerned, it's not ok to describe the situation as if she was a shit mum when you have no further information.

Car seat in the trolley = totally normal.

Baby in nappy only, as people have said, could have been because of a million different scenarios.

Did you want us to say, oh yeah total shit mum, you seem much better than her??

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