Chickenpox!

[NotReadyForThisX2]

Baby group this morning and at the end of the session one of the mums was showing another mum (her friend) spots on her Dc and said "oh he's got more now, think it's definitely chickenpox then". The child had sat and played alongside the other babies/toddlers all morning and she'd not mentioned that she thought he might have chickenpox at all.

I'd overheard so asked if she thought he had chicken pox, why didn't she say something at the start of group. I've never personally had them and I'm pregnant so I admit I do get a little worried when they go round. But even without that, my Ds is only 7 months so don't fancy him getting them yet and some babies were only a few months old. The chicken pox child is a toddler.
She replied that he was contiguous before the spots anyways so any of the kids in the room could have them, which I do get. But surely it's different if you actually know (or highly suspect) that they have them. Or was I unreasonable?
She went off in a bit of a huff saying I'd made her feel bad and like her Dc weren't welcome.

You can pay to be vaccinated. I just want to throw that out there, it’s £60 in Boots. It would save you the stress of panicking every time there’s an outbreak. It is dangerous during pregnancy.

YANBU about the Mum though, she was incredibly selfish.

I’d have replied, “Well yes you are NOT welcome if contagious!”. They are most contagious in the 48 hours before the spots appear however they REMAIN contagious until the spots have scabbed over. She was being utterly selfish and irresponsible. If she had suspicions she should have been spending her time at the GPS surgery - not a playgroup!

SWBU. If you have enough reason to suspect chicken pox you have enough reason not to be in a public place where you could infect vulnerable people. I would have said something quite a bit stronger than you did.

You also have been exposed OP, so I would ring your GP/ midwife for advice and immunity testing asap.

Fingers crossed it misses your family.

What a selfish cow-I don’t think children have the vaccine until the age of one. I wouldn’t worry too much about yourself though-surely you would have been vaccinated at around age twelve or does that not happen here?

"She went off in a bit of a huff saying I'd made her feel bad and like her Dc weren't welcome"

Yeah, consequence of taking your contagious (infectious?) kids out in public! Honestly, some people!

Boggles chicken pox is not routinely vaccinated against in the UK.

If you think you've never had cp you can get tested for it at the drs, I did when I was pg. Turned out I must had had it v mildly and not had any symptoms, but the point is, I didn't have to worry after that.

She was extremely selfish and irresponsible. You were very moderate and would have been well within your rights to be a lot fiercer.

She should feel bad and her infectious DC were not welcome.

Chickenpox is a mild illness for most children, but it can also be very, very dangerous in some people. Children who contract CP prior to age one are at greater risk for childhood shingles and may not develop lasting immunity, meaning they could get it again in the future.

Currently AFAIK the only CP vaccine available is a live vaccine. Ordinarily these cannot be given until a child is one year old.

I was tested for immunity when I was pregnant with Ds and Dp had shingles. I wasn't immune but didn't catch it. I don't think they can vaccinate when you're pregnant can they? And didn't plan another so didn't get done before.

My mum always thought I'd had them very mildly as she remembered me having a few spots once and I never properly caught them. Only thought about it more when Dp had shingles and I asked the midwife if I'd be ok.

People often seem to have a rather relaxed attitude to CP not realising or even comprehending that it might be a mild slightly uncomfortable illness for some but for others it's serious, scarring and can even for some be life threatening (I am one of these people so yes I do get quite huffy about it!)
My kids are vaccinated against it to protect me (I can't be vaccinated) but I still get worried when it goes round nursery / school
I'm all for telling people it's infectious and that they shouldn't be out unless necessary (baby group really doesn't count!) and even then with care to avoid infecting others.

Usually they can't vaccinate when you're pregnant because it's a live vaccine and those are not safe for pregnancy.

It is indeed quite possible that if you had a very mild case you did not develop lasting immunity.

Exactly @wonkylegs. That was her and her friends attitude, all children get it and it's better they do. Only that's not always the case.

Glad I wasn't unreasonable, we've only just started at this group and I haven't made many friends yet so hope that I've said doesn't make it awkward next week.

It's not always the case that it's better at all. DS is 8 months and has taken over a month to recover and he's still not fully healed. He had his on top of an eczema flare up which I had to stop treating because you can't put hydrocortisone on broken skin.

My DD caught it from school and passed it to both DS and DH. I'm on week 8 of dealing with chicken pox and it's repercussions (averaging about 4 or 5 hours sleep per night).

So I'm feeling pretty huffy about it all myself now.

It's very selfish of the mum.

Have you had chicken pox? If not, you need to call your GP and tell them you have been exposed. I caught CP when PG and it could have been very serious. I was put on antivirals within 2 hours of the first spot appearing and it stopped DS2 getting the virus in utero. I had to have lots of extra scans. Thankfully, it was all ok in the end, but I did worry for the rest of the pregnancy.

That sounds horrible @Tumblefluff. Hope everyone is fully better soon.

No I don't think so @Watsername. Or I had it so mild I didn't build up immunity to it. When I was pregnant with Ds I wasn't immune and I've not had it since then.
I think it's late pregnancy that there's the biggest risk to baby, so hopefully would be ok even if I did get, which hopefully I won't.

I was about 12 weeks, I think. And it could have been serious then.

Please please please call the GP tomorrow and get their advice, especially if you weren't immune last time. They can give you CP antibodies if not immune, and antivirals if you do get it. You are right you will probably be fine, but don't risk it xxx

My DD had no immunity to CP when she got pregnant, in spite of having been immunised against it as a baby and then having the MMR jab when it came in when she was a child; she wasn't immunised after having her other DC due to timing.

It was going round her DD's school at the time, fortunately her DD never got it and neither did she but it was a very stressful time for her.

Very selfish and stupid of the woman to take her child to such a group if she suspected the child might have CP, or any other infectious disease, come to that. She deserves to be made to feel unwelcome.

We are very casually ttc and attended a family function recently where my DH's SIL took her 2 year old child and after a couple of hours announced that the kid had chicken pox. I was pretty pissed off but couldn't say anything as no one knows we are ttc. Anyway, SIL clearly went and moaned to bitch MIL who came over to me saying "what's the problem, you've had chicken pox, haven't you".

I was incensed. Still bit my tongue though because I don't want anyone knowing we are ttc, as I have confirmed fertility problems.

Some people are just absolute arseholes.

I will give them a call to be on the safe side @Watsername.

YWNBU.

Woman was completely irresponsible. I've no problem with kids going to groups with colds and minor bugs etc but chicken pox is a different kettle of fish. Especially if there were small babies there.

YWNBU. Not ok to take a child you strongly suspect has chicken pox to a kids group or any public place really.

My daughter ended up seriously ill in hospital with chicken pox. The doctor in A&E said he’s increasingly seeing complications and more serious cases of chicken pox.

Very irresponsible, I’m on medication which can have very serous consequences if I catch chickenpox

YWNU at all.

I am currently dealing with the pox at home.

DS2 caught them at nursery. Ended up with them in his eye so we had to go to hopsital. I said when we arrived that he has CP. They said it was fine. I told them no it wasn't and insisted on waiting in a side room so as not to infect anyone else.

DD now has them and DS1 has them for the second time. He was only 8 weeks old when he caught them the first time.

DP took DS2 to school today and went into the office insteas of the yard and explained the situation. They tried to tell him that they aren't contagious because they already have spots. DP countered with "well if they aren't contagious they can come to school"

You made her feel bad? Good, she's a cunt. I've been immune compromised and people like her are massive stupid selfish twats.