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AIBU?

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Original poster

Child using potty in public

243 replies

Moominfan · 06/05/2019 19:15

I'm pretty easy going, bordering on complacent to mumsnet standards. Went to a fair today. Kid and dad in queue. Dad whips out Potty and the kid does their business there and then. Is this what I have to look forward to? Mines not potty trained yet. Would most people atleast go hide behind a bush or something? There were loads of people around. Place was heaving.

OP posts:
Ratatatouille · 07/05/2019 07:46

Would love anyone who thinks that is ‘grim’ to advise on what they would have done.

@EastEndQueen well clearly you should not have even considered leaving the safety of your home during potty training and besides, if your DC was truly ready then they would magically know how to hold it and wait for the toilet from the moment you put them in pants. They should have been easily able to wait 10 minutes while you located the nearest public conveniences. Haven’t you listened to all the expert opinions on this thread?? 🙄

There are public’s toilets. Where any person no matter what age should be toileting unless they are in a nappy!!!

The three nearby towns that we use on a regular basis are all without public toilets. Have been for years now. It's not really a town Vs country thing anymore either as PP are claiming. It's cuts.

Sirzy · 07/05/2019 07:48

So the only options are waiting for 10 minutes to find a toilet or whip out the potty there and then? Seriously.

Surely it doesn’t take too much thought to find a quiet corner out of the way? And if a child can’t wait a few seconds for that then no they aren’t ready to toilet train yet.

SushiGo · 07/05/2019 07:51

I don't like this either. I have potty trained x3 and certainly have had to facilitate some alfresco wees but we went behind a bush or the car door, or to the loos if at all possible.

You are meant to stay home for the first couple of weeks precisely so you can get them to a stage where they are able to make it to the toilet (or somewhere privateish at least to get the travel potty out)

TheFairyCaravan · 07/05/2019 07:54

It's completely grim to whip out a potty in a crowded area, be that the middle of John Lewis, a queue at a fair, or the middle of a restaurant. It's just not necessary. If you think it is then your child's not ready for toilet training.

We never took a potty out with us when we did our two. We only ever used it in the bathroom at home. None of this sitting on it in front of the tele rubbish because that's not where you go to the toilet.

Ratatatouille · 07/05/2019 08:06

You are meant to stay home for the first couple of weeks

This is just not possible for the majority of parents.

Sparklingbrook · 07/05/2019 08:06

We skipped using a potty altogether, and I have never seen anyone whip one out for their child to use in RL.

We went straight to the loo.

coffeeforone · 07/05/2019 08:13

I don't think I would do this, but wouldn't bat an eyelid if I saw someone else doing it

However, I don't think there's much harm in popping a pull up on on the early days if you really need to go to somewhere without easy access toilets, long motorway drive is an example where we used a nappy even when DS was potty trained.

SushiGo · 07/05/2019 08:16

*you are meant to stay home for the first couple of weeks

This is just not possible for the majority of parents.*

Did you miss the part where I have 3 kids? Of course you have to take them out sometimes - especially younger dc, but you don't have to go to the fair or other leisure events And it's pretty confusing and unfair to the poor kids to take them out and about all the time when they are still trying to get the hang of sensing when they need to ask for a wee.

Ratatatouille · 07/05/2019 08:17

@Sirzy Plenty of PPs have said that potties are completely unnecessary and children should all be able to wait however long it takes to find a toilet. I was aiming my comment at them.

Ratatatouille · 07/05/2019 08:21

Did you miss the part where I have 3 kids?

Erm...well done?

You have no idea why other people make the choices that they do. Maybe it was another child's birthday and the visit to the fair was a treat. Maybe the potty training took longer than they had expected. Maybe they just don't want to stop the whole family from doing things for however long it takes to potty train the toddler.

Aprillygirl · 07/05/2019 08:23

You can't be that easy going if a toddler having a little wee on it's potty bothered you so much OP. I don't see the issue at all,though I do feel for the dad having to carry the empty, but still dribbled in piss potty, around afterwards.

AlphaJura · 07/05/2019 08:27

I've never brought a potty with me whilst potty training. Just spare clothes in case of an accident. They have had to go behind a bush or something for a wee if we couldn't find a toilet but that's better than whipping out a potty in public imo.

Spudina · 07/05/2019 08:34

That's grim. I never took a potty amywhere. With DD2 we skipped pottys altogether and just used the toilet.

Original poster
Moominfan · 07/05/2019 09:20

No issues with toddlers using potties privately. This was a really busy event. Huge queue for a ride in front of a massive audience. Toilets were far away but there were nearby discrete places. It just seemed so undignified

OP posts:
YemenRoadYemen · 07/05/2019 09:38

It is undignified and most people manage to avoid the need, so YANBU.

Aprillygirl · 07/05/2019 09:39

He obviously didn't want to lose his place in the queue. Good thinking I reckon,and there is nothing dignified about potty training.

Smallereveryday · 07/05/2019 10:07

... and there's absolutely no need to do it outside. I can bet you a tenner your parents didn't do it - and I can bet you a thousand that your grandparents didn't wander round with a potty outside.. yet ... miraculously.. we all managed to work out how to use the toilet.

Just stop being so pathetic.

RainbowWaffles · 07/05/2019 10:08

People take all leave of their senses when it comes to children these days. They engage in totally unacceptable behaviour or allow their children to do so on the basis that they’re just children and it’s normal. You see it on this thread and a variety of other ones. I wonder whether standards have always been so low and they are just more visible now because you can see opinions on the Internet?

ScrewyMcScrewup · 07/05/2019 10:15

Disgusting. Some of you on this thread are absolutely rank.

TheFairyCaravan · 07/05/2019 10:16

He obviously didn't want to lose his place in the queue.

If he had said to me " I just need to take my little one to the loo, can you hold my place?" I would have agreed to. Most people would.

Sparklingbrook · 07/05/2019 10:26

Good thinking I reckon,and there is nothing dignified about potty training.

Which is why, if at all possible don't even start with a potty.

AntiHop · 07/05/2019 10:27

Yabu.

When I was potty training dd we were house hunting. We absolutely couldn't stay at home all weekend. We carried a potty around that had a water tight close so you could empty it later. We only needed it a couple of times over the period of a couple of weeks before she was past that phase.

TeddybearBaby · 07/05/2019 10:38

I read this out to my 12 year old son this morning and said what would you think? He said I really don’t think it’s a good idea to teach little kids to pull their pants / knickers down in public like that and that he’d be nervous of who’s around. Didn’t even think of that side of it. Wrong in so many ways.

HeyNannyNanny · 07/05/2019 10:43

The whole purpose of toilet training is learning to control the bladder. So whipping out a potty within seconds basically defeats the point.
This is what pull up nappies are for.

I've toilet trained A LOT of children in a private family setting and have never had a child use a potty in a crowded public place.

Original poster
Moominfan · 07/05/2019 10:45

Teddy I didn't think of that either Sad

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