Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To be deflated that boyfriend too tired to see me..

65 replies

Tolerianetreats · 04/05/2019 13:48

Last night but had time to be on line and interacting with his female friend till 2 this morning??? Havent seen him since tuesday and am
Due to meet him later tonight for a walk and supper. He’s not that interested in me
Is he. I am
Angry but wonder I am being unreasonable

OP posts:

Original poster

Tolerianetreats · 04/05/2019 23:31

Thank you but that is so harsh !

OP posts:

WhenISnappedAndFarted · 04/05/2019 23:33

@Whatisgoingonwithmylife's post? Why's that harsh?

Vehivle · 04/05/2019 23:37

Dude. He sounds like he has an inappropriate relationship with this other lady. I get men can have female friends. But choosing to spend 5 hours chatting to her in the early hours instead of spending physical time with you- when he works with her too! It's not on.

If you really want to make it work with him - have the ultimatum conversation and tell him you want him to prioritise you and the relationship more.

But frankly... I wouldn't be above doing that if I'd been married to the guy for like 10 years and things were becoming stale. But you're only dating and have been together just a year. The fact you are facing the possibility of asking him to prioritise you when it should be coming to him naturally at this point in the relationship. ... it just isn't good. I'd be ending it if I'm honest. Even if he does start to work harder in pritorising you when he realises you're serious about binning him off - it doesn't change the fact there would always be doubt at the back of my mind with regards to his relationship with this other woman. I don't want to be with a man who thinks it's OK to chat to some other chick for 5 hours because when he cools it off with that lady, he may think it's OK to do that with another female friend. I'd just feel like our expectation regarding behaviours outside the relationship were too different and therefore incompatible. He needs to get himself a "cool" wife and you can find yourself a man who isn't interested in having any other female friends to confide in except you. FWIW my partner is like that and it's great!

Zucker · 04/05/2019 23:38

Are you the same poster where you don't have sex with this guy ever and he's forever texting someone you refer to as the Queen? If yes, fgs dump him he is not for you. If you're not the same poster, same advice applies.

Madamedeluxe · 05/05/2019 07:40

Oh yes I recognise you. He keeps dropping you off early, he hates sex and has a lady friend he texts in front of you. He’s still doing it.

Cottonwoolmouth · 05/05/2019 08:41

OP he is in love with this other lady. But she doesn’t want him and just keeps him around to build her ego up. That’s why he chases her because she throws him tiny bones to keep him interested.

You are in love with this guy but he doesn’t love you and just keeps you around to build his ego up. You chase him because he throughs you tiny bones just to keep interested.

Don’t be so desperate.

Madamedeluxe · 05/05/2019 08:47

It’s not a proper relationship is it?

Ihatehashtags · 05/05/2019 09:41

Yes it is that bad. He isn’t making time for you because he’s not that into you. God he doesn’t even want to have sex with you! Dump him ASAP!!

SuperDuperCuper · 05/05/2019 12:44

Honestly - are you very young? This is silly. Just dump him and move on. Gather up your self respect here.

ENormaSnob · 05/05/2019 13:00

Get some self respect and get rid.

JacquesHammer · 05/05/2019 13:09

You’re not compatible.

You want different things.

AtrociousCircumstance · 05/05/2019 13:14

Yes it is that bad, and you know it really.

Be brave and get rid. Take a big step towards a happy future by leaving him behind - he is not in love with you.

Original poster

Tolerianetreats · 05/05/2019 17:45

What is not natural to me is the amount of time he spends in his family home with his parents. I was at his home yesterday where he proceeded to watch sport for the afternoon with his folks and I sat around with his mum until I dropped him to the pub on his own to meet friends . Then today he brought me off on a day trip.. a drive in his car and an ice cream . Fantastic few hours but here I am again at home while he goes back to his folks for the evening.I’m sick of this .I’m
Going to dump him .

OP posts:

werideatdawn · 05/05/2019 18:46

Yes. Dump him. Dont think on it any longer.

ColdNeverBotheredMeAnyway · 05/05/2019 19:26

Do yourself a favour, dump him and buy yourself the book 'He's Just Not that Into You'

Take care, you're worth more than this.

Flip

1 2 3