Aibu to not want to fill a smarties tube with £1 coins

[Invisimamma]

This will be outing if any parents from my child's school are on here...

Both children came home from school and nursery today with a tube of smarties each as a gift from the PTA with instructions to eat them and fill the tube with £1 coins or 20p, letter specifically states not coppers or 5/10ps. Apparently the tube will hold £12 of 20pences.

There will be a prize for the class who brings back the most money.

Now I have a few issues with this:

1. my friends child has a diary allergy was really upset he can't eat his treat (she didn't know this was happening so couldn't provide an alternative)
2. we still have lots of Easter chocolate and don't need more
3. dp and I both work but childcare and other costs are crippling us at the moment and we're skint, an extra £24 is really beyond us just now
4. we've just paid £46 snack money to nursery and £12 for a school trip for one and £8 for a trip for another (amongst lots of other recent school costs)
5. does anyone even has coins lying around the house anymore? I use contactless payment for almost everything and don't draw out cash.

The children have been hyped up about it and both have said they need to raise money for the school. I guess I'm feeling guilty that we're not in a position to participate/it's a pain in the arse idea.

I'd let them eat them then fill it with coppers and tell the DC's you had special permission if they say anything or if you have to fill it up then say at the end you had to give it to the teacher early but keep it, better still let them eat them and ignore it all!

Presumably the school would have a fit if you put the Smarties in their lunch.

Wtf? Let them eat the smarties and don't return the tubes. So cheeky to ask/request donations like that through children who will see it as fun...and the parents take the financial hit.

Genuinely, this is one of the most shocking things I have ever read on Mumsnet and I've been here for 12+ years!

Is this even true?

I haven't read the whole thread as I'm so gobsmacked by your OP but has anyone in the previous 103 messages actually defended this unbelievable idea?

This is one I'd like to see in the Daily Mail and I never thought I'd say that.

Fill with 1p's then put 2 20p's on top

YES the bloody cake sales which don't even make financial sense as they're sold at a loss.
Just let the kids stand at the gate with a contactless card reader and get a quid or two off everyone that way - no faff, more cash!

Our school does this and I don't participate. In fact I now ignore all fundraising that involves food wanted as donations or sold deemed unhealthy according to their over the top pack lunch policy.

This is terrible, yes fundraising is important but schools are part of the wider community that can help raise money.
Does the school have a PTA?

I wouldn't be doing it and nor did I do any of the charity things.
I can't afford much and have a particular charity I give to, when I can.
Parents shouldn't feel as though they have to do this so their dc won't be left out, that's awful.

mine dont do school as we home ed but a family in the street had 8 kids(few sets of twins)in the one primary

if this happened to her i would feel so sorry for her

We've had this before. I filled it with coppers anyway. Some money is better than none right and that's what they'd have got otherwise! CFs

RomanyQueen1 - the op says "both children came home from school and nursery today with a tube of smarties each as a gift from the PTA"

Just ignore it and don't sent the tubes back. I never bother doing that kind of thing, and tbh I think the school have got a cheek to ask!

Our school does this every year. But suggest 20ps for chores done over the Easter hols. Every year I sack it off and send them back with a fiver each.

Our PTA has done this a couple of years, though they stopped short of asking for pound coins.

We did mixed coins from change jar the the first couple of times, this year we just ate the smarties.

I'm afraid my willingness to contribute to the PTA has diminished over the years as I've seen money spent, frankly, on total vanity projects whilst I know there are schools down the road where kids are arriving to school hungry each morning. And when 2 summers ago some of the kids asked if some of the money that had been raised could go towards Grenfell survivors, they were told no because the PTA wanted to raise the most ever in a year for the school...

£12? Are they having a laugh?

Put the 20ps in lengthways rather than standing up.

I usually support pta wholeheartedly but I think this is dreadful, for all the reasons pp have said (although I haven't read all posts) I feel so strongly I'd write a complaint letter I wouldn't just ignore it as I think the head teacher should be aware of the position they may be putting some families in. It's naive at best or humiliating cruel to those that struggle and their children are feeling bad when listening to the propaganda speech.

Seems weird just to ask parents to fill the tubes with money. They did similar at my dss' school once, but you were supposed to put 20p in the Smarties tube each time your child did something helpful round the house. Funnily enough, very few tubes came back even a third full! The exercise was not repeated, but given it required the kids to make a bit of an effort for their Smarties and there was no expectation to fill the tubes, I didn't mind - it made my kids less whingey for a couple of weeks when I asked them to help do stuff!

I totally understand OP. When DD was at primary school there was some NSPCC fund raising and the amount raised meant they got a certain level of badges. It was sponsorship and for a start we have no family nearby to ask and I was not going to pester friends and workmates. But is was so important to DD to not be the one without badges. I am a single parent and donate happily to charities I believe in but will not be blackmailed into sending money to one I do not choose support. It is is not okay. DD is older now and will happily tell teachers that the NSPCC do nothing except spend money on adverts (disclaimer I am a CP professional) and are not actually rushing out to act on referrals to their help line and rather just passing on to the local social work team. Families I work with literally do not have a pound to spare these days and the kids I work with just feel even more singled out by Christmas jumper days, world book days etc.

Cakes sold at a loss? 20p per cake? Our school charge £1 per cake. Even the dozen for £1 fairy cakes go for 50p each along with each Maryland (supermarket own brand) cookie.

Our pta run events used to be ok. They are embarrassing now. I get that they want to make money but the £1 a go chance to win a prize which turns out to be a mini haribo bag is just too much. Another stall prizes contained a sweet, a balloon and a cheap plastic Christmas cracker gift - but I mean the mini tree cracker plastic shape. With a bit of forward planning and clever shopping, they could source decent prizes for very little.

Graphista, we dont mark out any child or family. We have no idea who sends anything back and who doesnt

My kids wouldn't accept the smarties because they're Nestlé! And, yes, it's crazy to expect every family to do this! We're skint!

The grabby approach alone would be enough to make me refuse.

Used to do this when my DC was at junior school and again quite a well to do area but we didn’t have that much disposable income we filled with coppers and on some occasions just returned the full unopened smartie tube as a) we don’t eat smarties and b) couldn’t afford that much cash.... the school needs to be made aware that not everyone is level financially ...I hated this aspect of school life made me feel very inadequate at times ... just return the tube or fill with Coppers and top and tail with a 20p each end ...

Ergh! I disagree with this on so many levels! My sons old primary school constantly asked for money and if I couldn’t afford it they would send the TA out to find me with her hand out. Literally. I ended up moaning to some other parents and quite a few found it hard to raise cash for extras. I stopped contributing. And ignored the hand held out. Schools should Not be doing this! And £12! Blimey that’s loads to find if you’re short. Don’t even get me Started on ‘bring a bottle of booze to school day’ for the school Christmas fair. There goes little Timmy with 2 litres of whiskey and a fuck off great red Bow... ‘he just insisted on that one....’ erm. I digress. It Really bugs me! X

this is really tough op.you cant stretch yourself and worrying about it wont be helping your situation.im trying to think of how you coud avoid it but so far....
could you talk to the school?would that be something you would feel comfortable doing.