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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have left him stuck in the cellar?

534 replies

FreddysTash · 02/05/2019 14:13

We have a new starter at work who is a pain in the arse. He’s shadowing me and constantly disappears and is always off exploring rather than doing what he should be doing. This morning we were in the office and he asked me where he should put clinical waste. I told him we put it in the cellar but that we didn’t have time to do it now as we had to go out of office. He said he’d be quick. I said no because it takes ages to get down there, he’d need codes for the lift down there, and two different doors. He grabbed a pen and paper and asked me for the codes. Getting frustrated I wrote down the codes and told him to be really quick and off he goes.

15 minutes later he’s still not back so I check time and decide if he isn’t back by half past I’d do without him. Half past came so I packed up and headed to my car. I’d just set off when I got a frantic phone saying he was stuck in one of the rooms in the cellar. I told him to repeat the code he had and it was right so I said he’d just have to keep trying. I drove off. 5 minutes later he started ringing again. I ignored it. All in all 4 missed calls. I rang him back and he admitted he was in a different room and that’s why the code wasn’t working. I told him I’d be back at lunch. It was 9.45 at the time. He started getting irate saying it stunk down there, it was freezing, pitch black and the wind was hammering on the fire doors. I left him until 11. AIBU as he got stuck because he went where he wasn’t supposed to go?

OP posts:
sundaybluecoffee · 02/05/2019 17:00

This isn't funny at all, so what if he was snooping, I'm sure most of us have at some point!

It doesn't give you the right though OP to decide to 'punish' him by leaving him there.

If I was him I'd be reporting you straight away, you sound nasty and unprofessional.

InsertFunnyUsername · 02/05/2019 17:01

YABU and bit of a bully.

We all make fuck ups start of a new job, some are overly eager to impress, asking a million questions, especially if young like to try and prove themselves, any good manager who has someone shadowing them knows how to handle these colleagues, without doing what you did.

BoneyBackJefferson · 02/05/2019 17:02

Bluntness100

Your update changes it, if he had numbers and could easily have got himself out, then it was fine, but why did you not say that at first? Wasn't as cool a story to you I suspect?

Given the quality of training that the OP seems to be giving, IMO its entirely possible that she hasn't told him this and is trying to get herself out of the MN hole that hasn't had the response that she wanted.

ChairmanMeow999 · 02/05/2019 17:06

Sorry - but there's a complete lack of following any lone worker or HSE procedures here - and whats more - as a new starter he should be mentored and preceptored and have a proper induction.

You'll probably find that if you look at your (NHS!) Policies and Procedures - you've breached a shed load - and so has the line manager.

I'd apologise and keep your head down and your gob shut....

NigesFakeWalkingStick · 02/05/2019 17:08

I'm only here for OPs response Grin

Nanamilly · 02/05/2019 17:09

Was he alone in the entire building?

Topseyt · 02/05/2019 17:13

Your updates still don't excuse what you did.

Whatever the ins and outs, you were responsible for this new employee. You gave him codes he wasn't authorised to have (you should have simply said a flat no). You then left him in there for two hours along with stinking clinical waste, which you seem to think was such a clever thing to do.

Not content with that, you have chosen to brag about your spiteful and bullying behaviour on a widely read and public internet forum, from which posts are regularly lifted by the likes of the Daily Mail.

It would absolutely serve you bloody well right if your colleagues read about this, recognise you and serve you a disciplinary at least. It might even be gross misconduct, for which they can suspend you or fire you.

Sometimes it is impossible not to marvel at just how idiotic some people can be.

Original poster
FreddysTash · 02/05/2019 17:16

I don’t work for the NHS! People are making a lot of assumptions here.

I wish I’d just called the manager and told her he was in the cellar so I’ll accept that I was being unreasonable however I was simply trying not to get him into trouble. As he was calling me I knew he had a phone signal and I had already given him a number of colleagues details earlier in the week. I told him who was up in the office if he should want to call one of them. He had their number.

He was entitled to the codes, it’s not a restricted area! Everyone has the codes. I told him which room he needed to be in down there.

And he’s not a young lad, he’s older than I am. I’m leaving the thread now as I accept I should have acted differently and people are just making daft assumptions (such as who I work for and that it was s restricted area etc!!)

He could have got out by calling someone in the office. Instead he expected me to be late doing what I was doing to let him out. I should have called the manager myself, fair enough. I’ll be mentioning it to to her tomorrow anyway.

When I let him out, he was fine and laughing about it making jokes about prison etc

OP posts:
Topseyt · 02/05/2019 17:19

We should remember too that we only have OP's word that this young man is a PITA. He may or may not be. He may be just young, naïve and over enthusiastic.

I wonder what his take on OP is? Somehow I doubt that it would be flattering.

DishingOutDone · 02/05/2019 17:20

If you're struggling with why this is bullying behaviour imagine the OP as a man and the trainee as a woman

I brought this up early on in the thread Tavannach but those gloating over what happened haven't seemed so eager to answer that one.

DishingOutDone · 02/05/2019 17:21

I’m leaving the thread now as I accept I should have acted differently and people are just making daft assumptions - oh that's why you're leaving the thread Hmm

IndianaJonesAndTheTempleOfDoom · 02/05/2019 17:22

There were fired doors. He could have asked for help from anyone. I'm not seeing how it's bullying that the OP didn't just look after him like a child while she had her own life to attend to. Confused

IndianaJonesAndTheTempleOfDoom · 02/05/2019 17:23

If you're struggling with why this is bullying behaviour imagine the OP as a man and the trainee as a woman

Why would it be different? Confused

I'd think the woman was a bit of a twat and that she should have called someone else and admitted she was doing specifically what she had been asked not to do.

Grimgle · 02/05/2019 17:27

You're a bully. Simple really! I hope you've landed yourself in the shit

Topseyt · 02/05/2019 17:30

When I let him out, he was fine and laughing about it making jokes about prison etc

I don't believe you.

youknowmedontyou · 02/05/2019 17:32

If you've got an issue with an employee then take the correct disciplinary channels . Do not take it upon yourself to humiliate the employee. You should've gone down to see where he was and if he was off course then advised you would be formally warning him.

You're his manager not his mother, act like a professional not like your teaching your 15 year old a lesson.

Thatdilemma · 02/05/2019 17:33

I don't understand why he wouldn't have called someone else if he had numbers as you say.

He wouldn't have got in trouble as at that point you had granted him permission and codes to go.

The bit before was irritating
At the point you gave him codes to the point he ended up in the wrong room which is easy to do in most workplaces if you are new he had done nothing wrong.

If everything is as you say I don't understand why he didn't ring and say Freddy gave me the code to move this waste and now I'm lost and can't get up unless HE was trying to stop YOU getting in trouble.

I'm not entirely sure how he got into a room he didn't have the code for but couldn't go back on himself either.

cabcab · 02/05/2019 17:35

Your drip feeds make you look like you're changing the story to make you look better. He was irate after 15 mins but fine after a couple of hours Hmm. Really?

cabcab · 02/05/2019 17:36

I'm not entirely sure how he got into a room he didn't have the code for but couldn't go back on himself either.

Bloody good point @Thatdilemma!

WhatchaMaCalllit · 02/05/2019 17:37

I really can't see how @FreddysTash is in the shit.
The New Starter was given the codes to the necessary doors to do whatever was required.
The New Starter was in an area that they shouldn't have been in and therefore got themselves into trouble.
The New Starter has already been spoken to about doing just this and was given alternative contact numbers if they got stuck but they decided to contact @FreddysTash instead probably because they had already been spoken to.

I'd say that the New Starter has learned an important lesson that they shouldn't go into areas of the building that they haven't been given the access codes for.

swingofthings · 02/05/2019 17:37

This thread is horrifying. You knew nothing of this guy. What if he had undisclosed to you that he had epilepsy and he had an attack due to the stress? How would you have felt if you'd come to get him out and found him dead on the floor and later found out of his condition?

I don't believe for a second he could have got out of called a co-worker but if he had, he wouldn't have waited that long for you to come and get him out.

People are annoying, you probably are to some people too, no-one deserves to be treated like you treated him and worse, feel so proud of yourself, you'd feel the need to post about it.

I never wish harm on anyone making mistakes but in that case, you took pleasure from putting someone in a vulnerable and dangerous position so I do hope he puts a complaint against you.

swingofthings · 02/05/2019 17:38

She's in the shirt because she broke health and safety law by willingly leaving someone in a potential dangerous position, how can some posters not see this?

WhatchaMaCalllit · 02/05/2019 17:39

Apologies for all of the text in bold. I only typed one word in bold but when I clicked Post it put most of the message in bold

Biancadelrioisback · 02/05/2019 17:40

So he wasn't stuck OP? He was voluntarily staying put? Weird

MadameButterface · 02/05/2019 17:41

you told him not to do it and that you didn't have time

then gave him the codes

Confused

do you find that you have problems asserting your boundaries in a way that makes other ppl listen and respect you? cuz if so that's on you tbh. perhaps work on your own manner and professionalism before you start on other people's eh. if you give people mixed/unclear messages when you're training them up, then guess what, they'll fuck up. of course if you're a hot shady insecure mess of a human being that may well be the desired effect. not saying you are, obvs but [shrug] ppl draw their own conclusions don't they.