To want a patio more than a holiday

[coralpig]

We moved house last summer and are lucky to have a decent sized back garden that gets lots of sun especially in the evenings.

I would really like a patio- DH is less keen. We have a quote which is about what we budgeted for our summer holiday (nothing fancy- a week in France at a family friend’s holiday home).

AIBU to pick the patio so we can enjoy summer, barbecues, maybe eating outside? DH’s argument is that we don’t have young kids (TTC in a few months) so not really watching little ones playing etc and that we are in stressful jobs so holiday is needed.

Patio, but it’s very difficult to compromise on these sorts of decisions. I much prefer to spend on home improvements that give us a lot of enjoyment year round whilst a holiday only lasts a short time. But after 30 years of marriage we’ve got to the stage when I get to choose and enjoy the home improvements & DH goes off on holiday alone, wouldn’t suit everyone I know .

Holiday. If you are successful ttc holidays will change beyond all recognition for many years to come.

Beltane Blessings

It is a tough call, but I think it’s really important to spend time being romantic as a couple before ttc and a baby comes along - then the happy memories will carry you though the arrival of your child (aka the relationship wrecking ball). You will never have that time to focus on each other ever again.

Holidays never really match up to the promise they offer. It's a bit like trying to buy a dream.

A patio however - is forever.

Although I’d normally say patio if you are trying for kids then a good holiday should be top priority.

Holiday with young baby or patio? Patio wins every time!

Holiday!

Definitely I'd go patio! It'll change the whole liveability of your place and make it more of a home. I only know this because... new build, paddock a mess on account of council over-the-top requirements for drainage; DH built a deck out from two of our sliders and hey presto, we have outdoor living space again and we're loving it!

Holiday, you could do the patio yourself for half the price

I'd prefer a patio over a holiday too, as something concrete that will improve your day to day living. Holidays are fabulous but don't really have the same return as a home improvement.

TTC isn't really relevant tbh

Well if we have the same weather as last summer a patio for sure!!!

Can you compromise and do anything a bit cheaper for a holiday? We had this dilemma a few years ago - we had quite a fancy holiday planned and decided to do something much cheaper and get the back of our garden decked as it gets evening sun, we have never once regretted it and 4 years later we still use it all summer long. If it's either / or I would go for the patio. Would you have space for a hammock? That might swing the deal with your DH - it did with mine!

I'd choose the holiday but that's me. However if you are planning for children soon your money will be needed elsewhere so maybe the patio and a short uk weekend break if a little money left over?

Patio. Every time.

I'd have the holiday now. Holidays with very young children aren't really holidays - they're like being seconded to another office with less equipment and fewer support staff than your own.

So have the patio laid instead of a holiday another year

Can you do both, if you do the work on the patio yourself? It's not that hard - you could do it in a couple of weekends.

Patio - as you'll get a smile every time you look at it - and you can have holiday picnics on it all through the summer and beyond.

Holiday. Patio next year to relieve the ttc stress!!

I'm single with no kids. First thing I did after I did the flat itself up was sort out the mess of a garden and lay a patio. South facing, have enjoyed it every year for the last eight. When we had that fabulous long hot summer last year, got home from work and was able to sit out there for hours every evening. Holiday is quickly gone.

Exactly. Holidays are great, but we all know a week after you feel like you've never been.

If we have a good summer, you can be out there on the patio daily, morning coffee, evening meals, friends over, or even just sitting on the long summer evenings having a glass of wine with your husband

Go on hols, and you'll come back and every single day you'll be thinking, wish I'd got the bloody patio done.

Funnily enough we have this exact dilemma at the moment. DH wants to lay composite decking in our garden whereas I want a week in Spain. We have a young child though so his argument is that a holiday spent running around after a 22-month-old would be utter hell 😬 my argument is that we’re hoping to have another baby next year so this may be our last chance to have an abroad holiday for a while.

Discussions are ongoing..

I would love a patio. I would have regular bbq's or just eat outdoors. Sit out side and read, do my crafts etc. I would love to have one with pretty outdoor lights and pot plants, nice garden furniture.
Two weeks in the south of France - meh.
What type of things do you usually do while on holiday (resturants, beaches, exploring caves or whatever)?. Get the patio and and have your holiday doing a local version of whatever you normally do. I bet your husband has no clue as to what lovely places to go to exist in your local area (there are lovely places everywhere if you look!).

Holiday 100%

Patio every time. Maybe go away for a cheaper week somewhere in the uk later in the year if you really feel the need to get away.

I don't understand though, a week in France, at a mates houses shouldn't come close to thr cost of s decent patio, as a patio would be several grand.

Could you not still to thr holiday but spend less when you're there?