My husband and I have been at a communication stalemate for a long time now and I’m to the point where I actually can’t take it anymore. I’m so beaten down by the turmoil and I can see now how it’s affecting my toddler more and more. We have a huge amount of unresolved issues my husband chooses to pretend don’t exist (“You just need to learn to be happy” ... end of story), reacts in anger and dismissal any time I ever express any discontent and I’m fed up with chasing my tail and feeling I’m the only one making any effort to compromise and solve issues. He’s a brick wall.
Last hope is counselling, though he’s refused to do this every time I’ve brought it up over the years, so the damage has just gotten worse and I actually have little hope it could even help at this late stage. Honestly feel life would be so much easier without him. BUT, I feel it’s worth a try, if not just to assure myself I’ve done everything I could on my end.
I’ve never issued an ultimatum in my life but now’s the time. I’d like to know if anyone else has said to their partners that they either attend couples counselling or separate...? If so, why (was it like my situation where one of you had previously refused) and how did it go? Any advice on how to do it? I’m thinking to ask and give him five days or so to mull it over before he gives me a decision. He’s very volatile so I have to make sure I’m feeling strong first because I anticipate an explosion. Need to stick to my guns.