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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be sad we're not going abroad this year

207 replies

Paraparanoid · 26/04/2019 21:31

We go abroad on holiday most years. This year we just can't afford the 4k plus it will cost our family of 4. Instead we've booked week in a cottage in the UK plus a few nights either side in Premier Inns, so will be away 10 nights at a cost of around 1k for accomodation and allowing 1k for spends. DD (13) unimpressed and I admit I feel a bit worried about crap weather etc although have done loads of research on things to do to keep us entertained. I'm now worried I could've done better with our 2k budget and perhaps could've gone abroad afterall. It would be school summer hols.

AIBU?

OP posts:
bluetongue · 27/04/2019 05:43

I didn’t even travel on a plane until my 20’s let alone go abroad! My family lived in a city 8 hours drive to the next decent sized city so long road trips were the norm to get anywhere.

Your DD will survive. She might even enjoy the UK trip.

Rosesaredead · 27/04/2019 06:01

I'd feel the same.

Also, I wouldn't consider a child who has holidays abroad every year to be spoilt at all! Travel is wonderful for children and teaches them a huge amount.

Just being some people can't afford holidays abroad doesn't mean that OP can't feel disappointed that she just has a UK break. Yeah the UK is lovely but we live here. It's not really an adventure to see it or spend time here like it is abroad.

YANBU OP.

GuineaPiglet345 · 27/04/2019 06:46

£4K on a holiday? Every year? We’re managing to go abroad this year for £400 for 3 of us, last minute booking but we usually spend about £200 camping in Cornwall.

There’s much better things I could think of to spend £4K on than a villa.

SerenDippitty · 27/04/2019 06:49

Also, I wouldn't consider a child who has holidays abroad every year to be spoilt at all! Travel is wonderful for children and teaches them a huge amount.

Depends on the sort of travel. I don’t see how a Mediterranean beach/pool holiday is much more educational than a UK one.

SheldonSaysSo · 27/04/2019 07:09

I appreciate that you feel sad about not going abroad, its a completely different experience to holidaying in the UK. I'm sure OP is aware that she is lucky to have money to holiday at all, I'm not sure why it always has to be a race to the bottom on here.

Hopefully the weather will be good for you, if not you'll look back on this in years to come and laugh at how you entertained yourselves in 10 nights of rain!

bebeboeuf · 27/04/2019 07:24

I love a UK holiday.
We’ve got some of the best beaches, the best mountains and best lakes of anywhere and it’s all easily reachable.

DH used to feel like he hasn’t been on holiday unless he’d got on a plane, I swiftly changed that mindset by showing what we have on offer

Ithinkmycatisevil · 27/04/2019 07:29

I'd be sad too if I couldn't afford to go abroad. It's very much a first world problem, but it's something we really enjoy as a family, and I'd feel like We were missing out if we couldn't.

I never went abroad with my parents as a child, and I did feel we were missing out to an extent. Also it's only the last few years that we have been able to afford to take our kids, and I felt that they were missing out that we couldn't afford to take them. We had holidays in this country that we enjoyed, but felt sad that they'd never been on a plane, or experienced another country.

Obviously your kids have plenty of times, it's just this year that you're having to give it a miss. Hopefully you'll have a good week weather wise, if you do you will have a great time on sure, the UK is beautiful in the sunshine, it's just a bit of a gamble.

By the way, we've never spent more than £2000 on a holiday abroad. This years was £1300 in an apartment for a week, £1450 with transfers and extra baggage. We will take about £1000 to spend, but could take a lot less if we had to and could easily have done everything including spends for the £2000 you're spending in U.K.

pelirocco123 · 27/04/2019 07:33

Those who say it could be done for 2 k haven't factored in its during the summer holidays.

Ithinkmycatisevil · 27/04/2019 07:38

those who say it can be done for under 2k haven't factored in it's during the summer holidays

I'm going mid august.

CountFosco · 27/04/2019 07:40

Depends on the sort of travel. I don’t see how a Mediterranean beach/pool holiday is much more educational than a UK one.

Well precisely. And those beach and sun all inclusive deals are the cheap holidays. We're taking the kids to Florence this year, airbnb in October will cost ~£1500, flights a bit less and we're assuming another £1K on museum entries, eating out, trips to Pisa/Lucca etc. Having said that we regularly have UK holidays that are much cheaper (no flights make a massive difference although airbnb in Edinburgh was eyewatering).

We didn't go abroad for years when the kids were small but now they are all at an age when they can start to appreciate the cultural experiences. For me it's not about the sun, it's about eating the food and walking the streets and visiting the museums and cathedrals (we were in Notre Dame last summer with them, it made the fire much more real for them and that appreciation of what was lost is important and they wouldn't have had if they hadn't been there).

bebeboeuf · 27/04/2019 07:40

We are going for 10 days to the Loire region of france. Staying in Les Castels for 1 week and then a weekend at a Chateau. All in costing £1200 including transport for 4 people end of July.

Davespecifico · 27/04/2019 07:42

We’ve paid just over £100 in total for flights (bags and taxes included) in the Summer for family of 3 to Genoa in Italy. We’ve paid about £900 in total for a 4 start hotel and a smart Airbnb with infinity pool.

I don’t understand this need to set aside thousands of £s for a holiday in Europe.

Original poster
Paraparanoid · 27/04/2019 07:50

Those who say it could be done for 2 k haven't factored in its during the summer holidays.

Yes, I am baffled where they are getting these prices from! Trust me, I did trawl Airbnb etc before making the decision to stick with the UK. I wasn't getting much for under 1k (so similar to UK cottages) but maybe I'm just too fussy. We then needed flights/ferry & perhaps car hire doubling the cost before we even got to spending money. Perhaps there are cheapo flights to be had by booking uber early but we didn't start looking until about February so maybe the good deals had been snapped up.

I do realise we're lucky as there are plenty of families who can't afford any holiday at all but it doesn't stop me feeling a bit sad!

OP posts:
pineapplepatty · 27/04/2019 07:50

I'm also one of those who likes to go abroad for a holiday, having spend too many wet summers in Cornwall spending ££££

We find it much cheaper abroad as the beach and pool etc are free and eating out is very reasonable.

Nixen · 27/04/2019 07:54

£2k on a UK holiday is a waste of money, you could have gone abroad

kateandme · 27/04/2019 07:54

StripeyChina do you mind camping.look into campsite and if you see them through canvas or eurocamp look to the sites they are on then find the website for the actual site.often they will have cheaper stays of their own from gites to tents(glamping basically houses!) or mobile homes etc.and look towards the surrounding towns for gites to stay.
we had the best holidays at these places and they were lots cheaper when you went to the site owned stays.
and always look for the deals.get yourself signed up to newsletters so ur alerted to deals.

supersop60 · 27/04/2019 08:03

I too am envious of the £4K for holidays abroad.
However - the UK is a fantastic place. Yes, the weather is unpredictable, but the landscape is so varied, the History is incredible, and there is always something to do. All 13yr olds can be grumpy, so ignore that.
Have a great holiday!

hellodarkness · 27/04/2019 08:05

"£2k on a UK holiday is a waste of money you could have gone abroad."

How is it a waste of money? I'm defensive because we spend a similar amount every summer, although we do go abroad in the spring or autumn too.

But i would never describe a UK holiday as a waste of money. We've stayed in beautiful houses in fabulous places and had some brilliant times. We've had houses opening right onto the beach, in cities we could never visit for a day, near sightseeing that knocks anything you'd find in Spain or wherever out of the park. The weather isn't guaranteed I guess, and you're eating familiar food, and speaking your own language, not never a waste of money.

happymummy12345 · 27/04/2019 08:07

As our own family - dh ds and myself, we never been on holiday even in the uk. Get over yourself

CountFosco · 27/04/2019 08:07

We’ve paid just over £100 in total for flights (bags and taxes included) in the Summer for family of 3 to Genoa in Italy.

Where are you flying from? Cheapest flight from my local airport is £190 per person so £1K for the family.

happymummy12345 · 27/04/2019 08:07

We didn't even have a honeymoon.

mistermagpie · 27/04/2019 08:10

This makes me sad, my children have never been abroad and 4K on a holiday is literally beyond my wildest dreams. It's a sun holiday for us again this year because that's what we can afford. It makes me feel about down that this is somehow not good enough and we should be 'side hustleing' a few grand because going abroad is clearly essential.

Enidthecat · 27/04/2019 08:12

I get why you're sad, but really you do need to give yourself a bit of a shake. My family never went abroad until I was about 9 years old and we still had a wonderful time going to places in the UK, I don't feel like I missed out at all. My husband and I cannot afford foreign holidays despite both being in good jobs, because life is expensive. Some people may never be able to afford a holiday abroad.

You are in a very privileged position and perhaps should try to put things in context a little that one year of a domestic holiday could actually be really fun. If you approach it with a positive mindset then you can have fun just about anywhere.

CupOhTea · 27/04/2019 08:14

I really wouldn’t feel sad. Celebrate the fact you are doing Jess damage to the planet. Surely teenagers are getting on board with that these days..? Or is it only near London they’re all vegan eco warriors Wink?

Enidthecat · 27/04/2019 08:14

It might also be just what your DD needs to realise she can't have everything she wants in life. She sounds a bit spoilt.