Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be this upset about minor racist joke

108 replies

Jetlaggedandangry · 25/04/2019 23:30

I am on a business trip to my country of birth, where I secured a major win today for my British employer. I should be celebrating but instead I am so upset😠
A colleague who is travelling with me called the HQ and when he said "I am calling from jetlag's country" the response was "I am amazed they have mobile network there". They were both very chuffed at the joke.
This is a wealthy country with very developed infrastructure.
I am seething and not able to sleep. Please tell me the iabu and then we can be done with it.

OP posts:
ZippyBungleandGeorge · 25/04/2019 23:33

Ugh I wish I was surprised the UK still has been who think this kind of thing is funny. YANBU

goldenchicken · 25/04/2019 23:33

Don't take it to heart. Some people are just ignorant and thick.

I had a penpal in the late 90's from North America, who was gobsmacked that we had central heating. In 19 fucking 98.

ZippyBungleandGeorge · 25/04/2019 23:33

*men not been

saraclara · 25/04/2019 23:35

You're not being unreasonable. People are stupid.
But try not to let it ruin your sleep or your achievement.

I think it would be good to let your colleagues know how it made you feel though. The one travelling with you can simply be told that it really bothered you hearing the response on the phone.
When you get back and speak to the other person about the trip, maybe oyu can make some comment about the richness of the country, and mock him/her for their stupid comment?

k1233 · 25/04/2019 23:38

You'd get that comment by Australians in rural / central Australia (don't rely on mobiles out there!), so to me it's an observation. People I know would probably say can you believe I get reception here when at home I've gotta drive up the hill and stand on one leg, flapping the other arm... Thats 30 mins from CBD in a capital city, so our expectations aren't particularly high. And don't even get us started on internet speeds...

gilchrist168 · 25/04/2019 23:38

Sounds like you are on a business trip with Prince Phillip.
Yanbu

TheBulb · 25/04/2019 23:40

I have had similar on a semi-regular basis since I moved to England in the 1990s, and the jokers are always terribly pleased with their incisive wit. What barbarous country am I from?

Ireland.

Disquieted1 · 25/04/2019 23:40

All forms of racism shouldn't go unchallenged.
Don't seethe, you're only hurting yourself. Call them out on it in the morning.

Original poster
Jetlaggedandangry · 25/04/2019 23:40

K1233 fair enough, but we were in the capital on a 42nd floor of an office tower

OP posts:
Original poster
Jetlaggedandangry · 25/04/2019 23:42

Thank you very much for your support. Good to hear that it's not me it's them...

OP posts:
Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow · 25/04/2019 23:43

It is crass and stupid as a joke. But I would shrug it off, personally. They are winding you up (in a pathetic way).

I don’t think these are things to get wound up about and I have received similar. You sound a little highly strung (sorry!)

Original poster
Jetlaggedandangry · 25/04/2019 23:47

Calledyou... on an intellectual level I agree with you and I've been taking this kind of humour on a chin for many years but today it really got me.

OP posts:
Bucketandspades · 26/04/2019 00:06

Ignore them, I was in the US last year and when I told people where I come from (North Scotland) they asked me if we had electricity and television!!!!

Likethebattle · 26/04/2019 00:10

It’s just a joke, we lived fairly rurally and our friends who lived closer to the city that the steam train stopped before their station so we could transfer onto a modern train.

llangennith · 26/04/2019 00:11

When I moved to Cardiff in 1973 some family members from London were amazed we had TV, including Top of the Pops. Some people are just stupid.

ThePixieQueen · 26/04/2019 00:12

Some people are genuinely ill informed, others are deliberately ignorant, only you know which category this guy falls into. Perhaps pick up a coffee table book on your country and gift it to him with an inscription on widening his cultural understanding Grin

SuchAToDo · 26/04/2019 00:14

Op, why didnt you say something ...you should have called them out on it, and said something like.thats a very offensive remark to come out with..or why would you say that, what makes you think my country wouldn't have mobile network?..in other words call them.out on it, repeat what hey said back to them so they realise what they have said and how offensive it is...if you stand by quietly, then.they will.contiue to.think.its ok to make remarks like.that (because they will assume you aren't offended because you haven't said anything)

Noahsmummyxx · 26/04/2019 01:23

Any racist joke isn’t minor, and yanbu!
I can certainly understand your anger and frustration as this has happened to me previously. I told my colleague in no uncertain terms that his joke was racist af whether he thought so or not and then proceeded to tell him how my country how some of the most beautiful riches of the world, soon shut him up!

Marypoppinshats · 26/04/2019 01:26

You need to tell your colleague and boss that if they make those sort of racist jokes in your country that the major win you secured won’t last long.

BingandFlop2019 · 26/04/2019 03:12

@Bucketandspades Ignore them, I was in the US last year and when I told people where I come from (North Scotland) they asked me if we had electricity and television!!!!

I've had that! I responded with the revelation that we brits invented both of those Hmm

I was asked by an American once if we had hours minutes & seconds in England...!!!! Then ensued an explanation about GMT

Coyoacan · 26/04/2019 06:15

That is why they need you on their team, because they would be incapable of selling snow to the Eskimos without putting their foot in it.

I think the joke is on them.

NotMyUsualTopBilling · 26/04/2019 06:25

I'm going against the grain here but I'm really not getting how this is racist or particularly offensive.

I've had comments like that from friends/family/randomers because we live in a (supposedly) rural area of Scotland. Can't say I've ever thought anything of it 🤔

Fifthtimelucky · 26/04/2019 07:00

I have also been asked by Americans if we had television in England. And was once asked if we had inside bathrooms. It was the 1990s.

Mind you, I did know an elderly woman in the 1990s who didn't have an inside loo and refused to have one, despite the suggestions of her nearest relatives.

And I knew two people in the 1960s who didn't have electricity in their houses.

zippey · 26/04/2019 07:03

It was ignorance rather than racism.

Oakenbeach · 26/04/2019 07:07

I'm going against the grain here but I'm really not getting how this is racist or particularly offensive.

Me too. Some parts of the world are just less developed than others. Commenting on that in the form of a joke is a bit crass but nothing more.

I live very rurally... If someone came to my house and quipped that they were surprised I had mobile signal, I may roll my eyes a little internally but I wouldn’t be offended and think he was “ruralist” (yes, I know that’s not a real word). Besides, there is no signal just 1/2 mile up the road so the person would kind of have a point!

Moreover, your sub-conscious equating of a “country” with a “race” is arguably racist. There are some mono-racial cultures in the world (E.g Japan) but most have a range of races. The implication that only the majority race is synonymous with the country is potentially offensive to those of other races.