I am contemplating an upcoming dilemma.
I work in a small office (8 of us in total). One of my colleagues is getting married later this year. Invitations have not gone out yet, but he has told us on several occasions that we will all be invited to the evening reception.
I have absolutely no desire to go, and intend to decline the invitation when it comes. My colleague is broadly a nice person, but we have less than nothing in common, have never and would never socialise outside of work, have nothing to talk about. I find him quite difficult to deal with at work because we have so little in common, every conversation is a tiring chore. I am sure he feels the same about me in return! I’ve also never even met his fiancée.
That’s all fine. I planned to buy them a card and present, make my excuses and be done with it. However, it has recently become clear that everyone in our office is planning to turn down the invitation, and I am starting to feel guilty. It doesn’t look good if none of us go - I am worried he will feel badly snubbed.
So, do I accept the invitation and suck it up for the sake of one night for the sake of being a nice person? Or do I stick to my guns on the basis that it’s not my problem to solve (and who knows - maybe he’s only inviting us to be polite and would be glad for us to decline?!).
I hate office politics and I really don’t want to contribute to anyone feeling excluded. We are a generally harmonious and easy going team, with no drama or stress. I really don’t want to put anyone’s nose out of joint.
So... should I stay or should I go?