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AIBU?

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Original poster

To remove DD'S leg hair permanently....

128 replies

newmum0808 · 21/04/2019 21:28

So, my DD is ten and starting puberty (boobs, hair and hormones). She's asked to remove her leg hair which is already noticeable as she's pale with dark hair. My Mum refused to let me shave mine when I was her age. Instead she let me dye it - thick blond leg hair glinting in the sun still haunts me.....
Now I spent years dealing with my thick black body hair (shudders), until I invested in an IPL machine. I haven't had to shave my armpits for years.... (ditto, leg, bikini etc). Anyway, I don't really want DD to start shaving as it's a bind (when I think of how many hours I wasted hacking my leg jungle...). Waxing is a pain (literally and time-wise to getting her booked in to a salon (I work full time)), so I'm considering using my IPL machine on her. Now, I'm aware it might not be permanent (hormones etc), but on the other hand it might be. But is there any chance she'd want leg hair in the future? Am I overthinking this? What do you do?
Thanks!

OP posts:
SarahAndQuack · 21/04/2019 23:06

@furryleopard, I also felt awful my mum wouldn't let me shave. My mum thought it was being 'adult' and not appropriate. I wouldn't want that for my daughter. But, this isn't that. Using temporary measures is a different thing.

Ihatehashtags · 21/04/2019 23:06

I think your daughter will love you for it. It’s a fantastic idea. Epilators are ridiculously painful, I wouldn’t be able to handle that. IPL is virtually pain free!

ItsAGo · 21/04/2019 23:07

Thank you for being a nice mum. I was also someone who’s mother said I didn’t need to shave my legs, left me only wearing trousers and thick tights then having to shave using cheap bic men’s razors as I didn’t know where to buy woman’s razors from.

Haffiana · 21/04/2019 23:07

This is a good thread about Lumea IPLs:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/3522092-Phillips-Lumea-has-changed-my-life

AbbeyB79 · 21/04/2019 23:09

This reply has been deleted

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azulmariposa · 21/04/2019 23:15

Epilators Hirt much more than waxing! I'd take her to be waxed, it's much easier than shaving.

megletthesecond · 21/04/2019 23:21

Gorilla Club here too.

I'm expecting to pay for IPL if DD needs it when she's older. I've been waxing for 30 years and spent stupid money on it, the only reason I don't want to buy a Lumea for myself now is that my hair grew back after electrolysis.
Epilators gave me nasty ingrown hairs, I think my hair was too thick for it.

HostessTrolley · 21/04/2019 23:25

I had a quick look on amazon. They have ipl machines on there for £70-80. Has anyone tried these? I’m a bit suspicious of the reviews

yumyumpoppycat · 21/04/2019 23:29

I would stick with shaving but you could let her know its an option in a couple of years if she wants.

englishdictionary · 21/04/2019 23:32

Im a medical professional ... children can consent if they can demonstrate capacity.

As a medical professional you should know that what they consent to at 10 may not be what they think when they are 20/30/40
Etc.

AlunWynsKnee · 21/04/2019 23:33

I'm also interested in which one to buy for my just teen. I can afford to buy a decent one that works for dd but can't afford to get it wrong iyswim.

LilQueenie · 21/04/2019 23:35

can she use nair hair removal cream. just be careful of reactions. I think at 10 it may be the best option.

btw I'm relieved its hair you want removed as I first read the title as aibu to remove dds LEG permanently Blush

reluctantbrit · 21/04/2019 23:38

She is too young to understand. Shaving is the only thing I allow DD, 11, at the moment as I think she needs to understand the whole concept of body hair and what it means to use whatever method in the future. When she is 16 or so i would agree with more radical solutions but not before.

underneaththeash · 21/04/2019 23:40

I think it's a good question OP, I don't think your daughter is an age to make decisions about her body and she may decide to have hairy legs in the future.

I'd just give her the options and let her choose.

Aldicheckoutworkout · 21/04/2019 23:45

My DM only really told me about shaving my legs which i started around 12/13. As an adult i now prefer waxing although it doesnt seem as smooth as first day shaving i definitely think the hair growth is a lot sparser. (Going to investigate phillips lumeA or ipl now!!) My dd is 12 and comained about leg hair a few years ago, i offered to wax them but she was scared of how much it would hurt. She hasnt mentioned it much since then. She does occassionally shave under her arms as she is self conscious in strappy tops.

WorraLiberty · 21/04/2019 23:49

Anyway, I don't really want DD to start shaving as it's a bind (when I think of how many hours I wasted hacking my leg jungle...)

No-one has to be hacking at anything.

Just buy her a basic ladyshave and let her get on with it herself. Once the initial shave is over with, it takes about 2 minutes per leg.

Yes, she'll feel some stubble but she'll get used to it and visually there'll be no hair.

Redpostbox · 21/04/2019 23:51

Anyone know if the cheap ones on Amazon work?

SkintAsASkintThing · 21/04/2019 23:54

Absolutely wouldn't use hair removal cream on a ten year old. That stuff is vicious. And as for epilating.Hmm..........
I'd get her a wet / dry lady shave so she can do it herself and if she wants to use your lumea later, she can.

TracyBeakerSoYeah · 22/04/2019 00:03

If you were my Mum, I'd love you to the moon & back & more.
Leg hair is a pain in the butt & it seems unfair to just give your daughter a razor or hair removal cream.
I remove my leg hair for myself, no one else.

PregnantSea · 22/04/2019 00:19

Hair removal cream gives me a horrible rash. Shaving does too. The only hair removal methods I have found that don't make my skin look even worse are epilating and waxing. I'd love to get laser. It's such a pain in the arse having to go get a wax or sit there and epilate everything.

I doubt that she will ever miss the hair on her legs, but if she does then that's ok because ipl isn't permanent

ValiaH · 22/04/2019 00:29

I wouldnt be doing anything long term. At 11 or 12 I would have said I wanted all my leg hair removed permanently (I am pale with dark thick hair). At 18 I would have said I wanted my bikini line permanently changed. Now mid 30s and from the time I had my eldest about 7 or so years ago I purposefully grow my body hair to demonstrate to both my dds and ds that women are hairy naturally, its ok, it is clean, and that it is a choice to remove it as and when, and that removing it one day doesn't mean you have to remove it for ever and vice versa. Views change, fashions change, I have friends who regret waxing their eyebrows so much into super thin lines as now they want thicker brows. Also leg hair is so much warmer under tights in winter! Shaving is fine and a rite of passage as a teen, teach her with shaving foam and a good razor and she will get the hang of it.

Raspberrytruffle · 22/04/2019 01:15

You sound lovely op, my mum also refused to let me shave at 12 but I was like a man or a gorilla with dark thick hair it was that bad, I used to be made to do p.e in my shorts and I'd end up crying because of everyone laughing at me. I resent my mother for putting me through that and il not let my dd go through it. If you can find out if it's safe then I'd go for it

Candymay · 22/04/2019 04:32

Gwenhwyfar I’m not sure about the IPL you can use at home. I haven’t looked at the machines but they would be very different from salon IPL which is similar to a laser machine.
Salon IPL - if done with the proper equipment and by someone trained and qualified (as I am) is permanent.

Birdie6 · 22/04/2019 05:33

Sure, go for it. I let my DD start shaving when she was 10 - if I'd had a lumea I'd have given it to her.

GorkyMcPorky · 22/04/2019 07:38

Oh and I will be doing DS's back too, if he wants me to. It's been hairy since birth and his dad hates his. If I can save him that bit of embarrassment and teasing, I will.