To think I can't relax in my own home?

[Galwaygirl]

Is it me or do you find it hard to relax in your house, find it hard when she is here as I always feel there are things to be done in his eyes, when in laws call I jump up if sitting down and if cars come around I feel I need to be up and about,anyone else?

🤔

Who are you talking about??
Do you mean when people come round you find it hard to relax??

Can you explain more. Who is always here? What makes you unable to relax?

Can never sit and read a magazine or watch tv as I always thing I should be up cleaning, tidying etc even though I think my house is tidy, feel people might think I'm lazy

Do you wear glasses? Take them off and you can't see any mess.

There's only so much cleaning you can do.

Relaxing is just as important.

I always feel there are things to be done in his eyes

Is this your husband you're referring to?

What does he do around the house? How does he react if chores aren't done?

Who is she ‘she’ who is always there? Why are you jumping up when cars go past?
I don’t feel like that at all to be honest. My house is the one place I can relax!

YABU. Your house is immaculate and you could do with a break.

This is hour home, not your work. You don't have to look busy. And I'm sure DH doesn't leap to his feet and start bustling around when visitors arrive.

If I know people are coming round I can't relax until they've been and gone.
I relax more when partner is home from work and kids are home too.
On my own in the house I feel like I need to be 'doing'. I think I feel lonely if I'm not busy.

So @Galwaygirl is it your DOG, or your CAT you are on about? 🙄

I think it's about the PIL

One of the benefits of being a single parent is not feeling judged by another adult who usually doesn't lift a finger.

I used to be just like you. Now my house is messy but lived in and I can relax and not feel guilty . Totally get what you mean. Might be time to have words with the fella though if he isn't pulling his weight.

Love that @DDIJ mentioned the car!!

My neighbours must think I’m nuts. When I get back from whatever errand I’ve been doing, I will just sit in my car for 10 minutes. Because as soon as I open my front door, life (work) must resume.

Maybe if you can start from the beginning and give us a bit more information we can give you some opinions.

Definitely not my feet are up with a cuppa at any given moment - visitors or not, tell them all to pee off then have a break

Sit in your car instead, if you have one. It's magical.

i LOVE sitting it in the car. im exactly the same at home OP. So my favourite 6 hours of the week are when DD is at gymnastics (3 x 2hr shifts) and i can sit and read a book and eat maltesars without anything to do or anyone shouting "muuuuuuuuum" at me.

She is Dh! Pre emptive text!

Do you feel judged or is he making you feel like that?

But DH stands for Dear/Darling Husband? So who is 'She'? Who is making you feel that you have to keep busy?

ah wait. Ignore me. Got it.

Well why do you feel that way?

The only time I don't feel I can relax in my own house is like now when DS & his mates (all 18) have taken over the sitting room to watch the football & I am serving pizzas . But I will soon go upstairs & relax in the bath with a glass of wine and then an early night with a good book.

I spend a lot of time ‘relaxing’, it’s good for you & I never feel guilty about not doing the cleaning or washing or whatever. What a depressing life if you are doing chores all the time.