Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To believe she’s just a friend?

43 replies

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 01:12

A woman who used to date husbands friend becomes close to husband and decides to take up a hypnotherapy course. Once she completed the course, she invited him to do a session. Husband develops an interest in chakras/healing energies and meets her two times after that for other sessions. Her texts became more frequent which I felt was slightly odd but obviously didn’t think anything of it as she was previously dating his friend and always asked how I was. Husband tells me that during one of their meetings she wore a short dress and apologized for dressing “inappropriately” he also told me that she spoke with him about losing her virginity with his friend and apparently had an “entity” become attached to her through intimacy (which I feel is inappropriate and don’t understand why she felt the need to divulge such information).

She also told husband that he has an “entity” attached to him which may have been through physical intimacy (I assumed referencing me). I decided to go along for a catch-up the next time they met up to try pick up on whatever was going on. She talked about her hypnotherapy stuff, how she was apparently possessed during one of her lectures throughout her course and how entities become attached to others and the “signs and symptoms” she then had to rush off for a “meeting”. A couple of months pass and I realize that she has blocked me on Facebook and tried to add husband as a friend which he hadn’t told me about but didn’t accept either. Husband seemed to think I was overreacting by becoming upset. I msgd her about this to see if there was some misunderstanding and she replied 2 days later stating how bizarre it was that I was blocked, she wasn’t sure what happened and other friends have also mentioned the same to her but she has so much “love and respect for both of us as a married couple”, she then unblocked me and sent me a friend request. I’ve since replied to her implying how strange the situation is and out of nowhere she starts telling me how she sees my husband as an “older brother” (although she met us both at the same time, about a year and a half into our relationship and never spent so much time to really establish any sort of close relationship esp not a brother)

AIBU to think this is inappropriate and overall just absurd (I’m not that much into the “healing” aspect of things either but I just don’t see how everyone she talks to seems to have entities attached to them.

OP posts:
MitziTheTabbyIsMyOverlord · 16/04/2019 01:29

I think she sounds nuts.

Personally, I'd let her crack on and have a giggle with my OH, but I guess it depends a bit on his reaction to her.

This is a crap thing to write on here, but in reality I'd also take into account how attractive she is, how much she is his 'type' and her status (happily married/single/etc) and base my reaction on that.

Lovelylugs · 16/04/2019 01:31

YANBU- I am interested and knowledgeable about lots of healing aspects and this seems over the top to me. Unfortunately some people get very taken up with what they believe or have just learned and often project it on to those around them. Personally I think if it's a therapist/ client situation it should be all about the client. It's very hard to know but it sounds to me like she loves the attention it gains her. Whether that's just in regards to your husband or she's like that with everyone is the question. I think the 'big brother' bit was her way of saying to you she doesn't fancy your husband. Who knows if that's true or not.

MarthasGinYard · 16/04/2019 01:32

She sounds ghastly Grin

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 01:43

@mitzi he told me he doesn’t find her attractive and more or less just finds the situation funny as she also stated that she helped cure a woman’s cancer and she can remember being in her mother’s womb. He has cheated previously with other women (which he recently admitted) so this just seems like another issue or more boundaries being crossed

@lovely She did mention that she used to have a lot of insecurities before the course but has since become more confident through what I guess she explained as some sort of “spiritual awakening”

OP posts:
Smelborp · 16/04/2019 01:43

She sounds ridiculous but your DH’s (new?) interest in healing and chakras would worry me.

She’s clearly being inappropriate, particularly with the dress and then apologising for it (or drawing attention to it) and the conversations about her sex life.

I find it hard to believe she blocked you by accident.

Is your DH planning any more sessions?

Greeborising · 16/04/2019 01:45

Is her surname ‘Fruitcake’ by any chance?

MitziTheTabbyIsMyOverlord · 16/04/2019 01:46

You have more of a DH problem than an OW problem... Leave them to get on with it!

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 01:47

I just assumed that if she really did see him as an older brother that she wouldn’t block his wife who was already there before we ever met her. Then I assumed maybe she still has feelings for her ex (who’s husbands friend) and thinks it’s a way to get closer to him. I’m just having difficulty trying to make sense of the situation

OP posts:
EmeraldShamrock · 16/04/2019 01:54

Alarm bells, she is definitely trying to seduce him mentally, if not physically.
I would not be comfortable with this.
Tell him you want to learn so he has a new partner.

Rumbletum2 · 16/04/2019 01:57

Nuttier than 🐿 💩

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 01:57

@smelborp I had the exact thought process as you and no they haven’t seen each other since I msgd her as she seemed to back off a bit

@greeborising Grin I’m happy someone said that as I thought I was living on a different planet

@mitzi I thought the same, these situations seem all too familiar except this time I recognize my gut feeling and was seeking some clarity incase I had just become extra paranoid after his admission

OP posts:
Greeborising · 16/04/2019 01:59

🎼what’s got a hazel nut in every bite!🎼

EmeraldShamrock · 16/04/2019 02:00

Oh I work with a few people interested in healing, they're forever trying to read people and connect with their soul, it can be overwhelming.
One asked me if I felt weird at midnight last night, she sent me a message during her cleansing as she knew I was on the night shift Confused

MarthasGinYard · 16/04/2019 02:00

She's definitely up for balancing his Shagras's....

Sorry OpGrin

Greeborising · 16/04/2019 02:00

Nutjobs who claim to be able to cure cancer with this bollocks should be locked up.
People have died believing this shite

EmeraldShamrock · 16/04/2019 02:03

Is he worth the stress OP.

LoudJazzHands · 16/04/2019 02:04

OP, are you saying your DH has cheated on you with multiple women?

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 02:12

@emerald it is definitely overwhelming especially when she tells husband he has an entity attached to him and I honestly think he was starting to believe it although I also don’t know much about it but what seemed to be a bit of a joke unknowingly about her seemed to backfire and confused me more when she blocked me on Facebook

@marthas that’s what I’m suspecting but she seems very persistent in telling me they’re nothing but “old friends”

@greeborising I actually think she believes what she’s saying though as she sent husband a voice note which sounded as though she was crying saying it was a miracle that after one or two sessions the ladys tumor had shrunk and that it should only take a few more sessions

OP posts:
SodaPoppins · 16/04/2019 02:13

Get rid of them both. Nutters.

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 02:16

@loud two that I know of and other women have come forward to say they have had drinks with him. Tbh I’m not sure what to believe and who to trust which is why this situation is also driving me mad

OP posts:
EmeraldShamrock · 16/04/2019 02:18

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour He probably half believed it because he is a weak man, the cheek of him to allow her say that considering all the bullshit she lies about.
Are you financially dependant on him, do you have children. Keep in mind OP we only get one life, I think yours would be better without him. I am sorry, you seem lovely whereas he comes across as a dick.
She is a lunatic.

EmeraldShamrock · 16/04/2019 02:20

In regards of who to believe, I am a firm believer there is no smoke without fire, they can't all be liars. It seems he is. Kick him out with his temptress, he is a weak willed twat.

LilQueenie · 16/04/2019 02:21

Shes talking bollocks and that's coming from someone who knows woo stuff like this. an entity would NOT attach itself over this. Whether you have my beliefs or not you can be assured she is saying this to try and lure him in. total bitch.

Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 02:22

@soda that’s what my gut instinct is screaming, even just trying to make sense of the whole situation and not knowing who to believe has taken too much energy. I think I just wanted to see that the whole world hasn’t gone mad in thinking I’m being too paranoid.

OP posts:
Liveyourlifeinpixicolour · 16/04/2019 02:37

@emerald thank you. No children, Fortunately I have a great family support network and I have stepped away from the situation for a few months as I was living abroad but with the constant msgs from him asking me to come back and “talk, relax, go on holiday etc” it was difficult to grasp clarity

@lilqueenie thanks I had done some online research about it and never seen that as one of the causes although I thought it was odd that she would’ve brought up her sex life with a married man to begin with

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread