AIBU to think that people nowadays are selfish?

[JUstme123456778]

Just that...I got to the conclusion that people don’t care about other people.
If someone asks how you are they are not interested in an honest answer.
Unfortunately I honestly believe that people are only interested in their own well-being and nothing else.
They are not genuinely interested how your weekend was or how you are feeling, they don’t really care about the planet or about climate change...it’s all show off...

Sorry I don’t seem to find a genuine person ( apart from my mum and dad) that genuinely cares

Are you having a hard time at the moment OP?

When my mental health is bad I can think like this. Its not true, though - most likely there are lots of people that care about you.

And in the wider world...there are many more good people than bad.

I’ve noticed this with family and friends. For example, I moved into my house almost 3 years ago now and my ‘DM’ still hasn’t stepped foot inside to visit. It’s so selfish and I’m an only child too so she’s not really making any effort I’ve had friends back out of meeting up after news of serious health problems etc. I think things are a lot more hectic these days, stressful jobs, money problems etc. but a few people are just naturally selfish

I wonder if it's much as it ever was but we are more privy to others thoughts through social media?

Depends on your circle of friends and family and who you mix with surely? Maybe I am lucky but the people I mix with, whether family, friends or work colleagues are generally all lovely, kind people. ... and I hope I show them the same levels of kindness.

I’m knocking on a bit now. It’s nothing new. I can remember people rolling their eyes when I was in my 20s when they asked someone in the office how they were and that person launched into a lengthy reply. People ask to be polite but don’t actually want to know.
Lots of people in London today who do care (even if most other people think they’re a pain in the arse as they’re trying to get to work).

Social media has a huge impact...we all try and show off how amazing we are by either donating to charity...saving the homeless etc...you know all this type of posts.
On a personal level ... if you are going through a hard patch...you find that you have no genuine friends. People are by your side when all is good..

Maybe it’s because I never use social media (apart from Mumsnet) but even here on Mumsnet you get people saying it is a ‘bunch of vipers’ etc etc. I’’ve been here 19 years & have only found helpful advice & suport, if I sense an unkind comment I just leave the thread immediately, I know there are some mean posters around but there’s no point in engaging with unpleasant people, whether on SM or real life. Be kind to yourself .

I think most people are generally kind/altruistic when their needs are met, but life is so hard for so many people that it’s easy to slip into a sort of “me against the world” mindset. Also, a staggering number of people just seem unwilling or unable to try and see/relate to anyone else’s viewpoint other than their own, but I don’t think this is unique to now... ‘twas ever thus!

Yes, the people who took to the streets in London today were just ‘showing off’. My friend who mentors refugee teenagers, and the volunteers in our local food bank are just ‘showing off’. My teaching literacy in a prison is mere ‘showing off’. The people crying on the streets of Paris about the burning of Notre Dame are just grief tourists.

Totally agree.

No-one gives a shit

Well GiantPretzell kind of yes...

I find people need to ‘have their say’ and tell it how it’s is. When really they need to remember that ‘their say’ is from their Perspective and others don’t need to act

I approached a stranger today who was sat on the floor in the showers at the gym. I asked her if she was okay and I meant it. I wanted to help her, she wasn't feeling well.
On the other hand, I couldn't care less about what my colleagues get up to at the weekend. People ask such questions as a conversation starter. When I ask my friends, I mean it.

For example Climate Change...if the people with a power to make a real difference cared then something could be done about it. However those people earn good money from the situation and we ‘the little people’ just pretend to care as we look cool if we do :-/

@hidinginthenightgsrden I see your point...and it makes sense I guess. I’d genuinely want to help a person in trouble too

Well, thank you for your insight into my motivation. I’ll be sure to remember next time I trek out to the prison after a day’s work that I’m clearly doing it entirely for my own benefit.

People are people. There have always been plenty of selfish people.

But honestly, the examples you give don't strike me as particularly selfish.

I find that many people visibly stop listening almost as soon as the person they're chatting with starts speaking, like, they ask a question then quit listening to the answer after a second....def think it's a new age internet related social media short term snippet conversation related thing..

hidinginthenightgarden

Know what you mean, bought a young homeless man a sandwich and tea on Saturday because it was bloody freezing, he looked really thin and I cared, at that moment, about whether he was alright. When I ask my affluent, middle aged, smiling neighbour, how are you? in passing, have to be honest and say I don’t really want a fullsome reply because bottom line is actually she’s fine. All depends on circumstances I suppose.

I work with the general public.

In my experience of late, they are entitled, rude, and shockingly arrogant.

Do people care about things like climate change and so on, yes I think most people who try and do something are genuine. Of course some do it just for show. Are people more selfish yes they are, selfish and self centered. There is a word a large number of the population appears to have forgotten and that is compromise.

There are selfish people their are kind people, always have been, always will be.

Your close friends should care and if they don't I would talk to them about it. Your partner if you have one, should care.

Parents and colleagues don't always care and can be crap.

But friends and partners are there to care that's why you have them, to lift you up when you feel crap and likewise you to them.

I think this about driving now. So many people just don't care that what they do is dangerous, just so they can get a car's length ahead.

@stravapalava that’s true 😔

Well the same could be said about you. Or if not selfish maybe self absorbed and self centred.

You're upset people don't care...about you.
You're upset people don't act how you want them to.
You deem showing off things you wouldn't do.
You suspect people of ulterior motives when the do do something "caring" either because it's now what you agree with or because it's not about you.

I'm selfish and I'll own up to it. Will you?