Is it abnormal to have no hobbies or real interests?

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I'm 25, I have 2 children under 6 and I'm in a position where I can comfortably be a SAHM. Yet even with the 'free time' on my hands I'm really just plodding along in life with no dreams, interests or hobbies.

I've definitely 'lost myself' since becoming a mum. Everything revolves around the kids or the house. Which I suppose is pretty normalish?

I used to ride horses a lot not in the last 10 years. I used to love reading but haven't read a book in years, I just don't seem to be able to get in to anything. They're the only real 2 things I've ever had much interest in.

What are your hobbies or interests? How do you discover one?

I think the age of your dc is relevant here. I had no hobbies or interests when the dc were that small as I was always tired. I was older than you though and working part time. DH always made time for his hobby but I would put family life (and rest!) first. Now the DC are older I’ve started going to the gym and swimming and I’m doing a 30 book challenge to force myself to read more which I’m really enjoying. I think you have to carve out time for yourself and almost force yourself (I really didn’t want to go to the gym - but I’m enjoying it!)

I definitely prioritise sleep 😂 They're not bad sleepers at all but I'll still take myself off to bed about 8pm..

I agree age of the children is relevant. I love to garden but it was impossible with babies and small children. Sometimes it's about finding a half hour for yourself eg to do an exercise routine or clothes shop without them.

I have a 6 month old and a 3 year old and currently off on mat leave. I do a dance class once a week that I've done for years, and get out and about a fair bit but totally get what you mean - its very hard to have interests with small kids. I work and will be going back in a few months, which we need me to financially but I also want to for my own sanity. It makes me feel like there is something more to me than being someone's mum. I wouldn't enjoy being a SAHM really, would you like a job or is it not practical?

Spend some time in the library. You can browse for ages. Start reading bits of books that look interesting to you, look in the best seller section, ask for advice or maybe even try some podcasts if you don’t feel like reading. My hobby is matched betting which I do to make extra money. You don’t sound like you need extra money but I find it a very fulfilling and interesting hobby as I am always learning from it and there is a whole community of people I chat to about it online. It is a betting system that involves calculations with virtually no risk. Other things I do to keep occupied is Zumba which is really fun and other classes like yoga and barre core which is similar to Pilates. I did the Couch to 5k programme too and now go on runs which I enjoy. I am also a member of a choir at work which I love. Highly recommend that even if you aren’t an amazing singer. It is social and very uplifting. If I had time other things I would like to do is join a tennis club and an amateur dramatics society. For some other suggestions, how about a book club to get into reading again? Or a Supper club? Or cooking lessons? Or any kind of art class? All very nice for meeting new people and filling your time. Or voluntary work? There is so much you could do!

I wouldn’t say it’s ‘abnormal’ but I do find it rather odd sometimes, but also quite sad. I only find it odd when it’s people that don’t have children and have lots of free time. Not much of a life to get up, go to work/look after children, come home, watch tv and go to bed, and repeat daily. You’ve got to have some happiness and relaxation! I lost myself after my DD was born too but now she’s in pre-school I’ve had some spare time to take up painting and reading again

Sorry, just re read that you are trying to find activities to do with the children? That is harder... I think I used to do most things with her in tow like music classes for her but you sing along etc. If you are comfortably off, there are some health clubs with crèches I think which might be good.

Running and fitness is my main hobby. Also reading and I like doing free OU and other online courses as I like learning new things to keep my brain busy (helps it switch off when I go to bed).

Your children are small so it isn't that weird. I'd start work on correcting the situation soon though.

It helps your children to see that mothers are people with independent wants and needs. Also, sometimes having to lose out in a small way because mum wants to horse ride or read a book at the time you want to do X is no bad thing at all.

One day they'll be gone, terrifyingly soon, and you'll be left with whatever else you've built into your life.

I expect the more you do it the more you enjoy it. Maybe try setting aside specific protected time for the things you enjoy and see if you can build up the habit.

I feel a bit like this, although tbh I was like it before kids too. I like reading, making my home nice, eating and watching films/TV. That's pretty much it...anytime I attempt to force myself into a hobby it never lasts long. Feels a bit sad!

I work from home, my children are 7 and 3 and we are refurbishing so my days are pretty full but I would love to have a passion. Aside from chocolate

I have a 5yo and a 6mo. Currently on Mat leave but in a couple of months I'll back to working 4 days a week, term time only. Between work and kids I don't have much time or energy for hobbies or interests of my own. DH works long hours so I don't have the opportunity to do much on weekday evenings and 'working mum guilt' means I always prioritise time with the DC at weekends. Or should I say what's left of the weekend after housework, swimming lessons, and children's birthday parties have eaten up most of it!

Before DC I was a voracious reader but I haven't finished a book in years. I used to love going to the cinema but DH and I are rarely able to go together due to DC and I don't fancy going by myself. I go out for dinner with friends every couple of months or so and have drinks with my lovely work colleagues fairly regularly. But I've realised I don't really do anything that's just for me and that makes me a bit sad.

You could do a hobby like dressmaking that you can do on evenings and whilst stuck in the house. There are online instructional videos/ classes now plus local shops may run classes. Playing an instrument, running, yoga. Agree don't build your interests around your kids, have your own interests. ? go back to horse riding and let your husband have the kids for a few hours

I've always read voraciously, but the one time in my life I didn't was just after my DC had been born - I was too exhausted and reading just couldn't hold my attention - I fell asleep! Your kids aren't that little though - six and what? I certainly got back into reading within a year of their births (although I still don't read as many books in a year as I used to when I commuted by train every day to work).

Maybe you just need to give it time. Or maybe you need to force the issue a bit with yourself - ask for book recommendations on MN listing the kind of books you used to love - or book a riding a session with a local stables. It's easy to do nothing day after day, but if you force yourself to get out and be active you might remember how much you love it. I loved skiing before I had kids, but after I couldn't be bothered. But after five years DH insisted we went and that first day it all came rushing back - my love of the feeling of wind on my face and zooming down a mountain - how could I have forgotten how amazing it is? Yet I had. It's really important to do things for yourself. Don't lose yourself in parenting. Your kids won't be little and dependent on you forever. You will need a life to go back to!

While my children were young I didn't have the time or energy for hobbies apart from just catching up with friends. Once the youngest was about 10 I started picking them up again.

Personally I think it’s sad, I made sure I kept up all my hobbies and interests, and made new ones, when I had my DS. I didn’t want my life to revolve around being a ‘Mum’. I was fortunate in that many of my interests could be followed with my DS or evenings/weekends and my DH was fully supportive in making sure I had time on my own.

Are not children at school or not? If not, how much free time do you actually have?

*both children

I realised years ago (when I'd finished uni and studying and started my first job), that I didn't have any hobbies. I'd been full of ideas and loved making things and reading growing up, but had got out of the habit.

I actively started thinking of things I might enjoy and my hobbies snowballed (much easier pre-kids). I got really into baking, and then started dressmaking, jewellery making, decoupage, crochet, embroidery...

Since having kids i do have less time so mainly stick to crochet/knitting as they're easy to do in the evenings. I try and read more now too, audiobooks are a good option for when I'm pottering around the kitchen or tidying.

Gardening has become a recent love as well. We've started growing some of our own fruit and veggies, and it's so rewarding and relaxing, and something the kids really enjoy getting involved with as well.

It is hard to start new hobbies when you've got young children, but I do think that having something that interests you and provides enjoyment outside of kids and the home is so so important. I hope you find something you enjoy :)

I've never had what I'd describe as a "hobby." I'm not interested in arts & crafts, detest watching or participating in sport, can't paint or play an instrument and have no desire to learn one. I appreciate a nice garden but don't want to actually do any gardening.

I love walking my dog, reading, mumsnetting and a bit of Netflix. I don't think I'm in the least bit sad or boring though others may beg to differ

Um, this is probably going to annoy you, but horse riding and reading are my hobbies! I had a very gentle Irish cob who was the perfect family horse when my kids were little (I discovered I was pregnant with my first child two weeks after buying her). I couldn't ride regularly when they were little so no competing, but I did escape in the morning for hacks with friends and for a lesson through the week. My instructor loved children so was happy to stand in the middle of the arena with my baby in her pram and hold her on her hip when she got older. Reading I did every day, even if only for 15 minutes. And I worked full time when my kids were little. You have to carve out the time and prioritise your hobbies. For me, it was kids first, work, then horse then reading. Sometimes priorities got moved around depending on who needed my attention more. I am lucky in that my DH is really passionate about running and football and totally understood my need for my own hobbies and had no problem minding his own children and scheduling his hobbies around mine so we both got 'me' time. As he should! It did mean that the weekends we rarely had all day together for family time, which I know a lot of people would find strange but it didn't bother us. I am glad I kept up my hobbies as my kids now love reading and horses and as teenagers, it gives us a lot in common. Find the time, OP, you won't regret it.

Sorry, I meant to say I escaped in the mornings at weekends.

I have no hobbies and do get very bored as l have a lot of free time.

But I've never found anything l enjoy.

Used to go horse riding but when XH left couldnt afford it any more.

I don't like exercise, singing etc.

I do like eating , talking and being with people but l don't have much spare cash to afford nights out

It’s probably healthier to have hobbies - for your state of mind. I’m a bit puzzled by people who have none because I have too many and not enough time. I think there’s something to be said for using different parts of the brain. I like sewing and crafts and they help me unwind. I picked those hobbies back up when she was 9m or so. The gym too.

I think it’s quite normal when DC. are young to get sucked into the bubble of child rearing. It can be very fulfilling and liltte kids can be fascinating so you don’t miss other things or people. The problem is that they grow up and away from you very quickly (in the best possible way as they make friends and develop their own interests and life outside the home). I went through this and suddenly realised when the youngest was about 7 that I was bored, isolated and lonely. At that time I realised something had to change so I found part time work, resurrected old hobbies, studied, made an effort to socialise outside the family group etc etc.

So it’s not weird. Make the most of time with the DC while they are young but remember this stage of your life is fleeting and you will need other things when they are older.

And the going to bed at 8pm might be of concern. Fair enough if it’s because you are properly tired but if it’s an escape because you are bored or depressed then perhaps it’s the right time for you to revive old interests or develop new ones?