To walk home alone at 3am?

[cantdorightornot]

Basically I live 10 min walk from the city centre or about 2-3 min drive.
Last night I went out with friends and I walked home at around 3am.
My boyfriend goes crazy with me but what is the point in wasting £6 on a taxi plus the taxis always huff and puff when I get in knowing how short the journey is.
What do you think?

I walk home from town late at night but then again it is a sleepy Devon market town. In some ways I would feel safer in the hustle and bustle of a city... 🤷🏻‍♀️

I wouldn’t go outside alone at 3am. But when you’re young you feel invincible. 20 years ago I sometimes walked 10 mins home from the pub on a lonely road and I thought it was fine. Now I’m utterly horrified that I dared to do that!

I’ve just realised I haven’t walked anywhere on my own at night for 12 years BUT I was mugged and it has had a lasting effect on my confidence. So, I wouldn’t do it now but I wish I still had the confidence to do it because we should be able to without fear.

Working for a major property in a city centre where I get passed all the police reports from each weekend and all the attempted thefts/mugging/rapes I can say I most definitely would not.

As a teenager / early20s I would walk home at 3am alone most weekends. I lived in London, a short walk (5mins) from the night bus stop. Walked through alleyways, quiet streets, flats etc.. pissed out my head quite often, I must have been mad. But I've never, even now (late 20s), felt comfortable taking cabs alone at night either.

Both options are unsafe alone.

I wouldn't do it, I used to and had a horrible experience one night which I haven't forgotten over 30 years later - I don't dwell on it but if I think about it (like I am now) I can replay it in my head like a film.

I think he's treading a very fine line between caring and controlling

Gosh...... surely there's space in a relationship for the person who is closest to you to tell you if you are being careless with your safety?

@brizzlemint ... ... seems like we’ve had the same experience. It REALLY should be safe. But it was not.

I would yes. I walk to and from the station for work every day at random hours.

I'm certainly not going to spend £5 a day on a taxi. I will get round to applying for a parking permit but just seems a waste when it's such a short walk.

Bythebanksof

It's ridiculous but now I don't even feel like I can go to sleep, I'm going over it in my mind. I haven't thought about it for donkeys years.

Why are you pissed off about him bringing it up, does he go on and on and on about it?
Do you think it's questioning your judgement, trying to control or infantalising you?
I agree with the pp who said if it bothers him that much he can pick you up but I'm guilty of moaning a bit at DD when she walks about late at night too

Depends where you live, surely? I've walked home at 3am loads of times.
I'd still do it now. You know what your area is like.

Graveyards are the safest places to walk through.

Again, that's completely area dependant.

Graveyards are the safest places to walk through.

Really?! If somebody wanted to attack somebody then are they going to wait on a street corner or in a place they can expect to be deserted? Aside from the risk of personal attack, they are dark and gloomy and you're more likely to trip over and knock yourself out.

I'm hiding this thread as it's freaking me out tonight.

Statistically you’re most likely to be assaulted by him, and then probably the taxi driver, rather than by a rando hanging about on the street. Sad but true, we’d all be better off walking the streets at 3am than at home with our BF or being escorted home by another man.

Actually it's an offence under Section 30 of the Road Traffic Act 1988 and you can be fined up to £2.5k.

No, it is an offence if you are too drunk to ride the bike. It is not an offence to ride a bike after drinking. There is no blood alcohol limit as there is for driving.

“A person who, when riding a cycle on a road or other public place, is unfit to ride through drink or drugs (that is to say, is under the influence of drink or a drug to such an extent as to be incapable of having proper control of the cycle) is guilty of an offence.”

The OP would be home in about 2 minutes on a bike.

Drunk walking is statistically more dangerous for the walker than drunk driving in for the driver.

If he's worried, he can come fetch you.

I've been in dodgy situations on foot, car, cab, public transport. The most danger of course, comes from intimate partners so tell him that!

Graveyards are the safest places to walk through.

There are lots of homeless men rough sleeping in our nearest large city cemetary, many of whom have alcohol/substance abuse issues. It feels edgy even during the day when there are people about & using it as a cut-through.

Personally in this day and age - after you’ve been drinking , and for £6 lousy quid - I think you’re barking mad.
Yes you can, but should you?

I understand your boyfriend going nuts. And as for that making him controlling what a load of bs

I do this most weekends coming back from my friends houses, sometimes drunk, sometimes sober and I always have.

My DM used to when she had a reason to be out late at night.

It has never bothered me and I usually have to argue with friends who insist on walking me (which leaves them in a similar position) or make me get a cab.

My colleague's at work, hate that I do this and try to put the fear of God up me, by telling me that something awful only has to happen once, but I argue that so far it hasn't and if I spent the money on taxis for the last 30 years I would never be able to go out as often as I do.

Wouldn't do it myself but obviously it's your risk assessment to make, not his (or ours).

I do think that, as a woman, your place seems to be in the wrong when something bad happens. Walking home alone? Asking for it. Walking home with a female friend? Well, that's the same as walking home alone so you're asking for it *. Walking home with a male friend or acquaintance? If he assaults you (and I know far more women who've had trouble with men they knew and trusted than with strangers) then why were you letting him take you home if you weren't up for it? Assaulted by a cab driver? You were a silly reckless woman for being so drunk in a taxi driven by a stranger.

• I had a bad experience twenty years ago when I decided to walk back to halls with another female student, because she was a bit the worse for wear and planning to set off by herself, which I thought was a bad call. Luckily nobody touched us, but we were stalked and repeatedly flashed at by the same guy over a period of what must have been twenty minutes. It was terrifying. All my friends - including the ones who'd been in the same bar and hadn't bothered to help the drunk girl get home - told me that that's why you mustn't walk home "alone" , or that I had to promise them never to walk home "alone" again.

@Eatmycheese What do you mean by ‘in this day and age’? Are you saying it’s less safe to walk the streets at night now than it was in the past? That’s not my understanding, though I may be wrong.

I would walk home.

I used to do this - till I had a couple of scary but lucky escapes from very dodgy men.

Now I just don't. It's not worth the risk. Get a cab.

I would (and do) do this! I think a lot of it has to do with your perception about what the world is like at 3am. To me it's marginally more dangerous (and more fun!) than 3pm. Keep your eyes open and don't take daft risks and all will be fine. For example, I wouldn't be wandering about wearing headphones as I'd want to be alert...