To keep them off school?

[AttendanceHmm]

My dc's school has been doing an attendance drive. They're obviously under a lot of pressure over poor attendance and I appreciate incentives are needed.

Before the holidays, we were informed that Mrs X's class had had over 96% attendance for the previous 4 weeks and therefore would get a reward, a day out after the holidays. As there were a number of spaces available, any dc who had 100% since Sept would go in a draw to fill the rest. So there are dc who only have, say, 94% who will definitely go, yet a lot with 100% who won't.

Wibu to keep my DC off that day and take them out, myself? They have excellent attendance and punctuality and I think it's unfair they'll be doing school work while their classmates are having a day out.

All this talk of "the real world" is true but mistaken logic. I want my children to grow up to be adults who take their mental and physical wellbeing seriously, to choose employers who act decently, to say no to abusive situations and have healthy expectations of themselves.

We have a mental health crisis in this country. Total madness not to be teaching your children individual discernment. Why are we British so intent on following the rules into our graves or mental health units?! Seriously don't get it. If the rules are good and sensible, follow them. If they aren't politely and judiciously ignore them or fight them if and when you have the energy.

But @Acis that's not teaching my DC resilience. I don't agree with opting out just because you won't be a success by winning. The emphasis is far too much on the winning aspect rather than the whole picture, which is taking part and trying your best. And that my DC's best, their own sense of pride in their own achievement is worth much more to them than any award.

I hate the new "resilience" buzzword. It's increasingly used by schools as a reason for not supporting children adequately because if they're left to sink or swim, they'll allegedly magically develop resilience. No, they fucking won't.

Making children do something they hate doesn't make them develop resilience. At best it leaves them bored stupid, at worst it leaves them feeling utterly inferior and put down. Fortunately my school didn't go in for competitive sports days, but were terribly hot on compulsory games. I hated the hours I spent shivering on cold netball pitches because the games teacher couldn't be bothered to give any time to the duffers so people just stood around chatting till it was time to go back in; going through that was simply a complete waste of time, gave us chilblains, and did nothing for our resilience or indeed anything else.

Shawshanks, I'm not suggesting your child opt out of sports days because s/he might not win; I'm suggesting s/he opts out because you said it was torture for him/her. Why on earth would you want to put your child through torture?