Interfering woman or not?! Sorry I am just so pissed off after reading this!

[jellybellybeanz]

This is relating to Pick Me Up magazine that I'm currently reading. I've taken a picture of it and it says 85% of people said Yes....

What is the problem here? She's 24 years old! She's an adult and can make her own decisions. Bloody interfering hag!

What are your opinions? In case you're wondering why I am so bothered about this, I'm only asking as not only has it pissed me off but because my husband and I have a similar age gap. However, He is the best thing that has ever happened to me out of all the blokes I've been with my age! We've been together for 10 years, we have a child who he adores and is a fantastic father and He makes us all very happy. He would do anything for his family. He works hard and provides for us. I can't really say any more other than he is my soul mate and we are together in sickness and in health.

My family have an opinion and one of them has even had a word with one of my parents, asking them to tell me that I shouldn't be with an older man... that's after we had our DS as well! So they'd rather me be a single Mum all because we have a large age gap.

"But people don’t like to believe that."

Or they have actual, lived experience that contradicts it. But hey, we clearly don't know our own lives.

SIGH

Why don't women his own age go for him? Probably because he's awful and wants a young woman to control. I've known many men like this and it's gross.

My daughter is 22yrs - that would creep me out if she was with a guy my age.

I don't like such large age gaps, but the thing is, will the mum change anything mentioning it? Has anyone turned around to their relative/friend and said "actually, now you mention it, I'd better dump this person I love. Good point well made."

And for the love of god don't go in with the grandkids angle. Better to stay shtum and stay friends if you want to look out for her.

YABU for reading those mags! 😱

I'm in an age gap relationship and we have 4 kids together. I met him when I was in my early 20's.

My friend is married to someone a lot older than her. There was no problem at all until he hit mid 70's when he seemed to suddenly really age and the gap felt much wider.

Not the kind of age gap I'd want my 24yr old DD to have at all. It would be like dating her dad! I know it's each to her own, but not for me.

It's up to the person involved to decide if an age gap is too great.

But here's my 'experience'. A BFF of mine married a man with a large age gap. When we were all younger there was no problem. But when we hit our 50s and her DH entered in his 70s, things changed. Her DH no longer had the 'energy' to keep up nor the desire to do the things we all wanted to do. BFF's life began to be 'circumscribed' because her DH became more of a 'homebody' and no longer enjoyed late nights and travel.

We are now in our early 60s. Her DH is in his early 80s and not in the best of health. We're all retired. DH and I are traveling, day tripping, going to events. BFF can do none of these things because she can't/doesn't want to leave her DH at home, alone. She tries to be excited for us, but you can see her sadness at how 'small' her world has become.

I know that many people remain vital and active well into their 80s. My mum was such, she was still traveling until she was almost 90. But statistically speaking, we do slow down as we get older. With a partner of similar age, that happens 'together'. When you have a large age gap, it generally doesn't.

MaxNormal well apart from the having sex with someone in their 20s. I just think most 48yr old men would find me annoying, and I would find it a bit creepy if someone was into me just for my body (which sadly isn't that firm tbh )

I have a close friend dating a man in his late 30s. She says she's really happy, her parents love him. But from the outside he's controlling, he clearly thinks he's superior to her, he's the boss and treats her like a child, many a drunken cry suggests she knows this too really. He's always trying to 'educate' her on life, because at 24 most people still aren't that experienced at life he's always got that slight power to tell her he's right, he knows better, even when he doesnt! No woman in their 30s would touch him with a barge pole, he wants a woman to control. And I find it hard because there's nothing I can do, and I am worried about her and the age gap. He's not nasty or abusive he's just a bit of a prick who likes to be in control, he likes to have someone who looks up to him to massage his ego. This is something I don't want for my friends and I really really don't want for my daughter, so yes I'd be worried because most age gap relationships I've seen have been similar.

Maybe this taints my views, but I've personally not met any 48yr old who I think is really on the same level as me.

There was a 20 year age gap between my parents. She was 19 and he was 39 when they met, and they married pretty soon afterwards. It was never an issue for them, or for me. My dad died at 84 years old, and fortunately he was physically fit until the end, so my mum was never restricted.

But even having experienced that, as a mum now, I would have been worried if my daughters at 24 was with someone of 48. I think it's reasonable for the woman to have sought advice about her daughter's relationship.. But as for putting a stop to it - well you can't.

Those magazines are shite.

Why don't women his own age go for him?

How do you know they don’t?

@MrsAitch13 I'm so sorry

My DH is 19 years older than me and he doesn’t control me in anyway whatsoever. Please stop saying there is always a power imbalance. There isn’t