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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Travelling with friends but only I got upgraded on the flight

150 replies

pennyguggenheim · 29/03/2019 12:12

I was travelling with four other friends. On checking in, I was offered a free flight upgrade. I asked whether my friends would too, but no just me as I have status with the airline. I accepted it, leaving my four friends in the back of the plane (12hr flight).

Was I unreasonable?

My one friend said it was bit selfish, but the others said balls to it, you got it for free, enjoy yourself.

OP posts:
brizzlemint · 29/03/2019 13:17

If you'd been travelling with one other friend then I'd be a bit [shock[ if you had taken the upgrade but as there was a group of you and you were the one sitting alone I don't think you were being unreasonable. I'm not sure I'd have done it though.

Barbie222 · 29/03/2019 13:18

No, I wouldn't. I can well imagine what they all had to say once you were away. Part of going away with friends is the journey so I'd have judged there.

Dramatical · 29/03/2019 13:20

*I would have taken it and swap with them regularly so everybody can enjoy a bit of leg space at some point.

Personally I would have taken it but offered to let Friends have a few hours each in it to eat some proper rest.*

That's not how flying works!

KatharinaRosalie · 29/03/2019 13:22

Of course I would take it, and would also tell a friend who got it to go an enjoy. Silly to turn down such a thing just so you can sleep next to people (in an uncomfortable seat) you will be seeing 24/7 during holiday anyway.

AFPH123 · 29/03/2019 13:24

Why not Dramatically? Would someone stop that happening? Are stewards that arsed about things like this?

DixieLandReject · 29/03/2019 13:27

I would have definitely taken the upgrade. I don’t think it’s selfish at all, it’s only a flight, it’s not like you’ve been upgraded to a separate hotel miles away from where your friends are staying. So no, YANBU.

BlueSkiesLies · 29/03/2019 13:32

I totally would have taken it and I would have expected my friends to do the same. I don’t consider a 12h economy plane journey as part of the ‘holiday experience’ it is only to be endured.

If I was travelling with one friend I would have gone and sat with them on their little foot stool thing if it’s BA business and had a few glasses of bubbly with them.

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 29/03/2019 13:33

I think it's only selfish if it left everyone else worse off. For example -

You'd asked everyone to pay more to sit together when no-one else was keen

You'd left someone on their own

You'd left someone to entertain a small child by themselves after promising to help

Anything else and you're not being selfish - in fact as many have pointed out they'd have more leg room and maybe extra food. There's no point all of you being cramped when one of you has the option of comfort.

Also if you do a lot of flying for work then frankly you deserve any benefit you can get out of it!

buzzbobbly · 29/03/2019 13:35

APH Why not Dramatically? Would someone stop that happening? Are stewards that arsed about things like this?

Multiple reasons.

  1. It's not a free for all.
  2. You are not the passenger ticketed in that seat
  3. The rest of us in BC get pissed off with people treating it like a fairground ride
  4. If you want BC seats, pay BC fares.

And yes crew absolutely DO care. It affects their workload, their manifests, the catering, passengers, everything.

I watched (champagne in hand) when an adult child got booted out of the BC seat next to his dad just last year.

soulrunner · 29/03/2019 13:35

The only downside of this for the others is that they don’t necessarily get an extra seat. They normally upgrade when the flight is full so they could well have reallocated the seat to someone else. Could be a nightmare person.

PuppyMonkey · 29/03/2019 13:36

I’m in two minds about it tbh. I’d have liked the upgrade, for sure, but I’d be far too worried about missing out on the craic with my other mates.

MarshaBradyo · 29/03/2019 13:37

I don’t want a merry go round in BC if I pay for it so I’m glad they don’t let people swap. You’re either in for the flight or not.

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 29/03/2019 13:37

Also I snooze and nap on a journey though, I guess if I wanted my friends to entertain me on the plane I might feel differently. But the whole 'the flight is part of the holiday' firstly you have the whole holiday to sit and chat and secondly shock horror people can go on holiday as a group and break off and do different things depending on their interests, just because you've agreed to go on holiday as a group doesn't mean you've signed up to 24/7 doing every single thing together the whole time.

If it was me or my husband that got the upgrade I'd expect us to share it so we could both benefit but then we share most stuff, I don't have the same relationship with my friends - wouldn't expect them to share

Zarky · 29/03/2019 13:38

Sounds like you can’t share based on above!

BadLad · 29/03/2019 13:46

That friend is ridiculous and jealous.

missteddy · 29/03/2019 14:01

Yanbu in my opinion, it would have been if you were only with one friend and you left her alone but they all had each other.

Tomtontom · 29/03/2019 14:10

For a long haul flight I'd have taken the upgrade. The only time I wouldn't is if it meant leaving your companion on their own.

As already noted, it's not acceptable to swap classes during the flight. The crew might turn a blind eye once, but not three times. Also if you want to visit each other, convention is that you go back to them, not them forward (with the exception in first where you have a companion seat, in which case you can request one visitor, depending on how busy the cabin is).

SunshineCake · 29/03/2019 14:12

I think this might be a story seeking post

Aubaine · 29/03/2019 14:21

Yes they absolutely care. My husband got an upgrade (paid for by insurance) on a long haul flight after a serious leg injury on holiday that left him in a cast and on crutches. 16 hour flight. I was in economy with our DC. Our 8 year old wanted to go into BC to see him and say goodnight. The economy air stewards were not keen as it was against the rules, although they did allow it for a bit after realising that DH on crutches could hardly come down the steps to see us in economy!! I didn’t go in but 8yo did for 10mins and the staff were very sweet to him. But no as a general rule, you can’t.

strathmore · 29/03/2019 14:23

you are not usually allowed to enter business or first class areas without a booked seat in that class

I regularly move between cabins and seats if someone is snoring.
I have also swapped cabins with family mid flight on Virgin- never asked on BA.

SkiFiend · 29/03/2019 14:26

Absolutely fine to accept the upgrade, especially as there were still four people in economy. I'd think twice if you'd been travelling with just one person though (although if I were that one person, I'd encourage you to take the upgrade).

Wannabeyorkshirelass · 29/03/2019 14:31

I think it's a bit of a shitty thing to do, but I see I'm in the minority. Surely travelling with your friends and sharing their company is part of the reason you go away together?

Pengrin · 29/03/2019 14:35

I’d have taken it and smuggled them out a couple of bottles of wine and some nuts.

Where were you flying to?

Not that it’s relevant, I’m just nosy and wishing I was on holiday.

JenniferJareau · 29/03/2019 14:40

I'd have checked they were OK with it first but none of my friends would have begrudged me an upgrade as they know I'd be chuffed for them if it was vice versa.

YouBelongHere · 29/03/2019 14:45

I travel regularly with three friends and would've thought they were mad if any of them didn't accept the upgrade! I've only done long-haul flights with my friends the once but we barely spoke the whole way there and back, just watched films/had our headphones on/tried to sleep etc.

As others have mentioned travelling with just one friend may have been different but as there were four of them it's absolutely fine.