Do your toddlers eat what you eat?

[ghostpop]

I'm in a bit of a rut with my two, heavy rotation of meatballs, spaghetti bolegenese, cheesy pasta, sausages and fishfingers. Oh and homemade pizza.

I know people always say "just give them what you have!" but AIBU to think it's not that simple? This week me and dh have had halloumi salad, a spicy curry, tuna steak, a morrocan chicken stew thing (which I did offer leftovers of to the kids but they didn't touch it).

We eat together at the weekend so they get introduced to stuff then but in the week I just offer what I know they will probably eat tbh.

What are your meals that you can share with your toddlers?

I wish my nearly 3 year old would. We too have a rotation of baked beans, fish fingers, pasta, homemade pizza, cheese sandwiches or peanut butter toast. She ate what we did within reason up until about 2 when she became more and more fussy. The latest is everything has to be drowned in ketchup or she won't eat it. When she was at the childminders she ate what she was given so I know it's an issue with us. I need to woman up maybe and if she doesn't eat what she's given either let her be hungry or offer something boring like porridge. I do worry about her rotation of food getting less and less all the time. She used to eat shepherds pie, fish pie etc. She's never eaten curry, even a really mild creamy one.

Yes mainly they do but not at the same time as they are ready for the evening meal at 4.30/5 and we aren't.

We eat a lot of pasta/ roasts / mash etc though as DP can't to,reset spice due to a medical condition so most of it is toddler friendly anyway and anything that isn't the children get fishfingers or a mini pizza instead.

As they get older and able to eat a bit later then they will be having the same as us.

I think the general rule with toddlers and food is to go for the path of least resistance. They will nearly all have fussy phases at some point and making food into a battle just prolongs it. DC1 went through a stage of only really eating fruit, yoghurts and biscuits and we tried really hard not to fall into the trap of pleading/bribing them to eat other things. We kept putting other food in front of them and if they ate it - fine, if they didn't eat it - also fine. They now usually happily eat most of what's put in front of them.

anticyclone I'm waiting for my daughter to start refusing everything, she's currently really good food wise so it's got too go tits up at some point!

Same problem as others. He'll eat what we eat mostly, but down to timing, I can defrost a soup and bake a roll in 10 mins for him, same for freezer chilli, spag bol, macaroni cheese, curry, fish pie or whatever, But dh and I both eat at different times due to scheduling at present. He likes pasta so that's always a staple.

And rejection, some days he'll eat what I give him, some days he'll gag and spit it out. Stuff like mash, smoked haddock and peas will be received with gusto one day, others he'll sit and look at it like it's poisenous. So depends on which way the wind is blowing basically.

I don't make an issue out of food so if he doesn't eat it I'll offer some fruit and a piece of toast or whatever.

We always ate the same meals-kids with a tweaked version sometimes- together when the kids were small. Then again we weren't adverse to the odd frozen pizza/fish finger meal ourselves. I think variety is the spice (mild for them) and giving them the same old shit while you eat the more expensive and adventurous stuff is a bit lazy tbh.

We've got the same issue as you. We love spicy stuff and noodles etc and mine won't touch any of that. Things like Thai curry you can't really make a 'bland' version.

They will eat wraps or nachos where they can add their own things so fajitas are good. Also some ricey things under duress like stir fried rice or kedgeree.

Stir fries are all rejected, I think they just don't like the crunchy texture.

Most pasta things they will eat.

I feel like I spend my life cooking. Even a takeaway isn't a break as have to cook them some stuff otherwise they just eat plain rice

My almost 4 year old has started to eat salad though! Finally decides she likes it if it's got a vinegary dressing. So maybe things will improve

We have definitely adjusted what we eat to keep it child friendly. Or one child friendly, DS4 is all about the beige freezer food, beans or sandwiches... am dreading the day DS2 goes the same way as he’s a fairly good eater at the moment.

On nursery days, we just have toast or peanut butter sandwiches etc for supper then DH and I eat later (Goan fish curry tonight, yum!).

On week days at home, I generally cook something the boys have for tea about 5.30 and DH and I have later, often pasta (plain for DS4) or something in the slow cooker and mash / couscous / rice or I if we’ve been out I do do a guaranteed hit such as nuggets, waffles, beans or a picnic tea and DH and I have something else.

Weekends - try and eat together; roast or something like shepherds pie in Sunday’s and maybe hot dogs / pizza / fajitas on Saturdays.

It’s loads less stressful now I have one who will eat a range of “normal” food. DS4 doesn’t hold back on telling me he doesn’t like the food I make!! So frustrating as I am a pretty good cook. So I end up adapting for him - I made a bacon and tomato risotto on Tuesday, he had a bacon sandwich instead.

Totally get feeling stuck between cooking bland stuff you know will get eaten and trying to expand palates....

I love to cook. We have adjusted things so that the meals are more family friendly. I find the summer salads I try to add steamed asparagus or some sweet potato wedges on the side of hers to make it more substantial as she doesn't really like leaves. So sometimes I will make a few adaptations but it's almost always the same meal.

Meals we have together
Fish pie
Thai Salmon fish cakes
Grilled fish and veg
Saag panner
Various chicken thigh tray bakes
Courgette lasagna
Carrot and potato rosti with poached eggs
Lamb chops with veg
cottage pie with cauliflower cheese topping
Toad in the hole
Fajitas
Falafel, flatbreads and salad
Beef stew
Chicken tagine with cous cous

I often add chillies to sprinkle on after.
I think you have to decide if you want to make two meals or not. Then if not then you have to compromise somewhere you can gradually add things in and make them more exiting.

Mine eats what we eat for dinner but he doesn't eat the same as me for lunch, he usually has a vegetable curry (I make a big batch and freeze it in portions for him) because I want to get more vegetables in him (he's hit or miss with them at dinner time) but I don't like it. He hasn't hit the fussy toddler stage yet though.

4 year old DS lives on beige food and pasta. He eats curry with rice as long as there's no meat in it and it's "yellow curry" (Korma basically, I made tikka masala once and I might as well have served him up a bowl of shit). I always give him a little of whatever we have but he never eats it. It's such a waste, I'm at a point where I rarely bother anymore.
Now 7 month old DS is weaning and is dairy free so nine times out of ten doesn't have what we have either because I use cheese in so many dishes and the free from stuff is rank

I don't have a child myself but babysit regularly (all day mon-wed) & I always feed the 17month old that I look after everything I'm eating, just a smaller portion. She loves it as we have matching meals!

We started to fall into a rut too as DS went from someone who would eat anything put in front of him (he still does this at nursery ) but was very fussy at home. Eventually I decided I wasn't eating yellow food forever so now I cook something that DH and I like and that's that. If DS doesn't like it then he can have toast.

However I do make sure to include stuff I know he likes with every meal and I am happy to make small changes (keeping his pasta and the sauce separate for example) and I do his favourite meals on a regular basis (so tuna pasta bake every Saturday for example) and usually incorporate sausages in some way on a Sunday (toad in the hole, sausage and mash).

My eldest did. My little one not a hope in hell. I try to adapt as much as possible but I like spicy food so it’s not always easy.

Mine does. We all eat together at 6 and have done since he was weaned. I appreciate that’s too early for lots of people but it works ok for us.

Very few things he won’t eat and he eats most of the examples given as not suitable for children (fish curry, stir fry, salads). I will say though that he’s starting to get a bit more fussy at nearly 5. I thought we were out of the danger zone! It’s never safe to get smug

Argh. We have a nightmare time here. My toddler is severely allergic to eggs, and is on a shellfish and nut ban until further testing. Salmon also makes him vomit and he seems wary of this, so refuses to eat any other fish. He also still only has 5 teeth despite being nearly 16 months old 🙄 and clearly can't be arsed to deal with anything chewy, ie chicken. He also refuses to eat anything in "nugget" form.

I can't eat gluten / wheat and also have oral allergy syndrome - meaning I'm allergic to a whole variety of raw fruit and veg, to the point where my eczema flairs up just prepping him an apple. My husband doesn't get home til 7.30 every night, so we can't eat dinner together during the week either.

I can't remember what we used to eat pre-baby - apparently everything we cooked contained salmon and peanuts, because I can't think of anything family friendly from the old days 😭 I've turned to Pinterest in desperation, and actually whenever I spot a thread like this, I go through it and write stuff down! We always have pasta bake in the freezer if I can't be bothered with a fight.

So I'm no help to you whatsoever, but I needed the rant...

No they don't. I eat with DH when the kids are in bed but once or twice a week I'll try and do a family meal and eat together.

I think it probably makes a difference if you have more than one child. I’ve only got DS and I’d feel bad if he had to eat alone every night.

I only cook one meal for everyone but I think that in 13 years of parenting my meals have probably become more family friendly (eg mild/medium chilli or curry rather than hot)

This week I’ve done
Left over roast beef with veg and mushroom risotto
Black bean chilli with raw spinach and rice-toddler ate spinach and rice and I gave her some cheese
Spanish style pork casserole with rice and veg
Cajun turkey steaks, mash, veg-said turkey was too spicy so I washed it off and she ate some
Tonight is fish, not sure what with yet, possibly salad and wedges
Tomorrow taco mince, rice, salad

So nothing too adventurous. When I do curry etc I take out pieces of meat for her and give minimal sauce and she’ll usually eat it like that (sometimes she’ll say it’s too spicy so I wash hers off )

Stroganoff as a pp mentioned I put brandy in at the beginning and hope it evaporates off rather than adding at the end

Stir fry rather than giving her a big spoonful of it all mixed up I tend to separate it out a bit as I dish hers up. It’s exactly the same as ours but she tends to eat better if it’s separate...

My DS is 20 months, he swings wildly from refusing anything but fruit and toast to wolfing down 3 helpings of aubergine parmigiana

We used to keep offering different foods till we found one he'd eat, but now we take a harder line. Every meal includes something we know he likes and eats, but we also offer other stuff that he's not tried before. After seeing a new food several times he will deign to try it, and often finds that he likes it, hurrah!

He hates spicy food but that's ok as I'm not able to eat much hot stuff anyway so it's rare that we have it.

I think a lot of toddlers are fussy, the key thing is not to give up and keep offering foods alongside things they like. Eventually they'll probably grow out of it (although some don't and end up the subject of an AIBU thread as adults ).

It's easy for people whose kids aren't fussy to say "oh mine share everything, just give them the salad!"

I thought that would be our life too, before we had kids. The reality is different. Some kids are fussier than others, and I don't want my child going to bed without dinner. We're also told "don't make meal times a battle ground" so I can't FORCE them to eat things they don't want.

So what we do mostly is some sort of modified version of what we're having for the kids. So if it was a halloumi salad, I'd give them halloumi sandwiches. I still put salad leaves on the plate or in the sandwich and encourage them to try them every time, but they inevitably get pushed aside.

There are a few meals that I don't even try to offer them because I know they'll just get wasted, but not many.

Cooking more than one meal is just too much effort for me, it's much easier to just modify the kids' plates a bit to make the same meal more edible for them by adding something they like and/or taking out something they don't.

For the curry, you can make it mild then put some into another pan with dried chillis to get hotter, or add chopped fresh chilli at the table.

Yes my 3 have always eaten pretty much what me & dh have.

We make adjustments for the dc, for example me and dh will have sweet chilli salmon but the dc willl have plain salmon. Or when we make sweet potato, chickpea and spinach curry I make 2 pots of it 1 without so much chilli and then the non spicy leftovers can be frozen in portions so next time the dc already have one without chilli so I just cook 1 pot for me & dh.

Favourite meals here for my dc are;
Salmon, sweet potato mash, broccoli & peas
Broccoli & cauliflower cheese with peas and carrots, baby corn
Halloumi, salad bits and bread
Fajitas (we cook them mild and me and dh add jalapeños to ours once on the wraps)
Chilli with wedges or jacket potatoe
Fishcakes with mash, broccoli & peas
Sausage pasta

I think with toddlers they often have fussy phases but it’s important to keep offering different things, as if you never offer anything new how are there tastes going to change.

Question for all the 'my toddler eats what I eat' people: have they always just done this?

Because without fail everyday I offer DS 18mo what we eat and do every bloody trick in the book to get him to eat it. He will basically only eat beige stuff.. pasta, rice, chips etc he's still bf so I know he's getting all his nutrients and he takes a multivitamin too. But for us it isn't just as simple as 'oh he just eats it because we put it in front of him'.

He inexplicably sometimes eats things ie he ate a truck load of stir fried beansprouts the other night but the rest of the time he just chucks it on the floor and gets upset.

I just have a feeling that some kids are good eaters and some might come to it later. I know that DP basically survived on pasta and pesto until he turned about 11 but now eats and cooks amazing, varied food. In fact we love eating and cooking all different types of food, hence why we're so gutted that dinbertime is so difficult.

Sorry for piggybacking OP but I feel like we're in similar positions!