School run

[hatetheschoolrun]

I hate the school run.

I work from home so I go in tracksuits, gym gear, work gear if I need to be in the office.

My mum also does 50%of the school runs for me.

Firstly they ignored me. Talked to one of them once when she had to as no one else there who was shocked I worked full time.
Couple then talked to me mostly around what do I do for work.

Now they ignore me again.

They all stand chatting and blank me.

I hate it.
The playground feeling of being left out.

I'm not imagining it. They blank me at parties for the kids.

Just fed up really. Fed up it bothers me.

It's only 7 years then it's over. Secondary school is a breeze. Never meet any parents. Hang on in there ..... I feel your pain

Why are they so fucking mean though?

I would never leave anyone out. I just wouldn't.

They aren’t being mean necessarily. Do you try talk to them?

I tend to talk to the same parents, doesn’t mean I’m ignoring the rest.

People are assholes. I get something similar for differnt reasons I've guessed at. Big hugs op

I hate it too OP. I time it so I'm bang on time with drop offs and pickups. I also use breakfast and afterschool clubs. My child's in Year 3. I can't wait until she walks to school...

Pick different people to talk to. Admittedly I'm in a group of great, very close school mum friends (dare I say a "clique" but not bitchy. We'll chat to anyone but usually coffee together) but before that I would talk to whoever was standing there as awkwardly as me.

You do get some right nasty pieces of work but they're everywhere in life, not just on school runs. Ignore them as you would anywhere else.

I found the only ones who would talk to me had kids in a different year. Odd.

OP they were the mean girls at school all grown up.

God there are some mums like that at dc's school. Will literally ignore you, even if you try and chat to them. Not a nice feeling. The consolation is that you won't be left with a gaping whole in your life when primary school finishes as you have a life and career outside of the playground.

This is how my school runs are, I wait in the car til as late as possible, walk in grab him and go.
I'm not there to make friends I have real friends outside of school.
When I gave birth to my dd everyone wanted to be my friend temporarily/see the baby.
I realised it was just a lot of bitchy women talking about stuff that didn't interest me.
You are best of as you are.

Yep. I've absolutely tried.

Im glad most parents in our school always seem in a rush to get to work so not many hang about chatting which I rather ten fold! Its so odd that just being in the playground can ignite certain types of behaviour and make us feel in high school again!

Rise above it, it's so mean spirited and petty that you are really best off out of it.

I'm watching the parents of my youngest DC's year fawn over each other and it is amusing. So competitive, snide and aspirational. I purposefully rock up late and avoid the oneupmanship, they all think that they're friends now - just wait until the reading packs come out!!

I am not there to make friends. But they stand in the little clique.

Even if they are on their own they blank me.

I know I should be able to be like "fuck em" but it makes me feel like shit.

It was literally like, they were shocked I worked then were even more mean when they found out I had a decent job.

You are all right it doesn't matter in the long run.

You don't have to only talk to parents of kids in your kids class. I bet there are other ostracised parents throughout the school. Have a shifty around the playground and see if you can spot others standing alone. Maybe try and chat with them, you may find a kindred spirit. Failing that, take a book.

Some people are just awful. Fuck em. Listen to music or go on your phone whilst you’re waiting.

The thing is, are you behaving how you want others to behave towards you? Are you smiling at them? Have you struck up any conversations? If you always look like you're in a rush, people may think you're not interested.

They are not being mean not talking to you, they would be mean if you went up to chat and blank you though. There is a difference.

You could invite one of your DCs classmates round for a playdate (how I "met" some mum friends). You could join the PTA (another good way to make mum friends).

DD went to a primary school where the parents were lovely (when you got them on their own), but when they herded together there was zero infiltration!

It reached the stage where I took a book with me (alway, always early to pickup). They either just left me to my own devices which suited me perfectly, or I found them asking about what I was reading in which case conversation initiated.

The trick (if it's a trick) is to be happy in your own company and take something with you so you don't feel daft standing on your own (book or phone or earphones).

Until I started maternity leave I was the same. I'd dropp DD off then have to rush for work whereas most of them didn't so would stay and chat.

I had this at DD's old school, bunch of bitches totally ignored me 99% of the time, unless the PTA wanted to borrow something/contact details for things/needed an event first aider (coz of various voluntary work) It shouldn't matter but it does feel horrible. Turn up as close to pick up as you can and try to ignore it, drop and run at parties as soon as your DC is old enough.

Im opposite, I pretend I'm on phone busy so no one talks to me as I'm always too tired in morning to speak small talk I just am not interested and j feel that once you get close to a group of them you risk falling out so I stay back and keep my head down..literally!

They're not necessarily being mean op. It would be unusual to get dozens of parents who were all rude and mean wouldn't it?

You say yourself that you are only there 50% of the time, and work full time. The parents who are there 100% of the time have formed friendships. They chat, recognise each other and go for coffee after drop off. They're not cliques, they're groups of friends, having formed friendships over hundreds of little points of contact that you're not present for.

When my kids were at primary I was really grateful to find myself in a little friendship group. We text, called, met up and became proper friends. I wouldn't ignore someone who approached me but after awhile you do stop looking around for new friends, you've got enough and you assume they have too.

I chat to anyone. Sometimes I wear gym.gear, sometimes work gear, not sure what relevance your clothes have though.

I agree with both CloudyTuesday and Vulpine.

Are you really trying to tell us that every single other parent is standing together in one clique, and you are left out of it ?