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AIBU?

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Original poster

given a cast off that’s worth a lot of money

185 replies

Bagitup · 25/03/2019 18:22

I’ve name changed for this.

About two years ago my friend was having a clear out and asked me if I wanted a bag. She hated it but I really liked it. I use it lots and have been given loads of compliments on it.

A woman I work with is really into bags (mulberry, Pravda etc) and was always going on at me that she thought the bag was worth a lot of money because she thought it was real ostrich skin Shock

I never paid heed to her but my mum commented recently that she had looked at the bag and she was convinced it was real ostrich.

Cut a long story short and the bag has been checked and valued and it’s real and worth thousands.

I have absolutely no plans to sell it. My friend bought it at a market abroad and thought it was a fake.

Do I tell her it’s real? Do I keep schtum?

OP posts:
MyKingdomForBrie · 26/03/2019 17:52

ask for a couple of hundred quid to buy a replacement bag Shock

Surely no one would do this?!

I would tell her, how lovely for her to have a possible windfall! Surely being able to do something so nice for a friend would outweigh keeping the bag?

CurlyWurlyTwirly · 26/03/2019 17:56

Well other people are saying keep the bag.

The original owner would be better off to the tune of several thousand pounds.
Thé OP has made this possible. She loves the bag, she doesn’t want the money. Why shouldn’t the OP get a replacement bag?

Meatbadger · 26/03/2019 17:56

Why would you go to such trouble to get the bag valued if you’re set on keeping it?

LaraLondon1 · 26/03/2019 18:04

Personally I couldn’t keep that from my friend. You might want to consider what happens after . She may presume it’s her ££. I think you deserve a nice alternative bag with some of the windfall .

Lockheart · 26/03/2019 18:06

@Meatbadger insurance? Curiosity?

Cookingclass · 26/03/2019 18:24

Personally I’d mention it casually. As in “a lady at work said it’s worth lots. Obviously I’m not selling it but thought I better let you know and see what you thought.”
Like some have said unless you’re selling the price is irrelevant!

springbreak3 · 26/03/2019 18:29

Putting a pic of it is 'outing?' How?

HappyBumbleBee · 26/03/2019 18:36

If it had been a few months ago I'd tell her but it's been 2 years! I'd sell it if it were me and i wouldn't tell anyone!

BrendasUmbrella · 26/03/2019 18:42

If you tell her the worth of the bag she may want it back or she may want it to be sold, so be prepared for that. It could also potentially damage your friendship even if she says she's fine.

If you want to keep it and use it and won't sell it, I wouldn't say anything.

Lovemusic33 · 26/03/2019 18:43

I think it depends on if the original owner could benefit from the money?

If your friends skint then I would tell her, sell it and go halves. If she’s not then I would keep it and keep your mouth shut. She gave it to you as a gift.

BrendasUmbrella · 26/03/2019 18:43

I second what a PP said, the friend probably told OP she got the bag from a market seller to save her embarrassment and knows full well it's valuable, she just didn't like it anymore and knew the OP wouldn't have accepted it had she known its real value.

Actually I think this is most likely. Or she unknowingly bought stolen goods.

bebeboeuf · 26/03/2019 18:49

I would be honest and tell her and ask if she wants it back (she won’t as she doesn’t like it) and you will feel better for telling the truth

Shamoogren · 26/03/2019 18:53

Of course you tell her Confused

HJWT · 26/03/2019 19:00

You have had it for two years, its YOUR bag! If you end up selling it give her half the money JUST to be kind, not because its hers to have!! But if your keeping it to use then she has no need to know the value....

Wannabeyorkshirelass · 26/03/2019 19:27

I'd sell it and keep the money.

StellaRockafella · 26/03/2019 19:28

I'd be surprised if it's an Hermès bag (well, a Birkin, Kelly or Constance) as one of the above in an ostrich skin would be worth a minimum of 5 figures.

I have a beautiful ostrich bag from Gucci. It was originally my mother's and bought in Florence in the early 90s for around £800. It's been valued at £4-5000.00 on the resale market but I'd never sell it.

Ostrich skin bags are only going to become more sought after as most luxury houses are stopping using exotic skins.

OP, if you do decide to sell it, don't say anything. OP gave it to you and it's now yours to do as you will.

TatianaLarina · 26/03/2019 19:30

Of course I’d tell her. What kind of ethically challenged arsehole wouldn’t?

How much money she has is irrelevant. If she’s got lots then she may tell the OP keep it or split the proceeds.

Honesty and integrity is a lot more valuable than money, so is a good friend.

SirVixofVixHall · 26/03/2019 19:30

I would tell my friend. I wouldn’t be happy walking around knowing how much it was worth, if she didn’t know. I would check first that it really was worth all that money.

crispysausagerolls · 26/03/2019 20:05

How is this even a bloody question?! You clearly have to mention it to her

NaturalBornWoman · 26/03/2019 20:16

I'd be surprised if it's an Hermès bag (well, a Birkin, Kelly or Constance) as one of the above in an ostrich skin would be worth a minimum of 5 figures.

She's never even said or intimated it's an Hermes bag, or any other brand for that matter. All she's said is its 'real ostrich', and that someone has apparently said it's worth £4.5K. Despite having come off stall in Turkey or wherever. Then she's disappeared. Cool story.

XingMing · 26/03/2019 20:19

If you tire of it, and sell it for anything like the figure being bandied around, then I feel you should give her half of what it made. If you don't sell it, then it remains a kind gift between friends. You have not profiteered on her gift and still love it and use it. The sticky bit would be between the two points: that is, I don't want to use it anymore, but I want to sell it on the open market for it's full value, or hold on to see how much it goes up in value in the next five years.

I do think the decisions are yours to make OP.

Exexexcel · 26/03/2019 20:20

Ooh I've got an ostrich bag (and matching wallet). Was given it. Not my thing at all. How do I get it valued?!

NotWeavingButDarning · 26/03/2019 20:20

You absolutely should tell her, of course, it's completely unethical not to. You didn't buy it for a tender from a car boot sale. It was generously given by a friend who wasn't aware what she was giving you.

Also, are you sure they said 4500 pounds and not 4 to 5 hundred?

rattusrattus20 · 26/03/2019 20:30

the first reply on this thread nails it, no plans to sell => no compunction in silence.

XingMing · 26/03/2019 20:31

Actually to revisit my post above. If you tire of it, and sell it, knowing it's putative value, then I think you should give your friend ALL the money it makes. She bought it, you have had the pleasure of using it for free so you are not out of pocket in any way, and she gets rewarded for her kindness. That way everyone comes away glowing with knowing the right thing has been done. Your friendship is cemented and her generosity is recognised.

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