children that are firghtened of dogs and how i find some parents are encouraging their fear

[haychee]

I have 2 medium to large dogs and i get so cross when i come accross children that just lose the plot if the dogs go near them. I can understand that they are frightened and i call the dogs away from the child instantly. But what makes me cross is the parents responses, "that dog should be on a lead" or i just get looks that could kill you dead. My arguement is, that if the child is that frightened then why would you take him or her to a place where dogs are everywhere in a dog walking area. Why do parents encourage their childrens fear by making these comments? what good does it do for the child? I actually saw one mother once who picked her child up every time the dog was anywhere close (like 4-5meters away). The child got increasingly anxious and the mother ended up having a go at me. I know and fully appreciate that some dogs are dangerous but mine arent and i think that when parents react like this infront of their children the message they are displaying is that its ok to be this frightened of dogs.

My daughter was once frightened of thunder so i purposely sat up with her watching a storm and saying things like "wow, that one was very loud" and " cor, look at that lightening isnt it beautiful". Because of this time i spent with her and the way we watched it together has dulled her fear - infact she gets quite excited if there is a storm brewing now.
Any one else feel the same or can understand where im coming from? or maybe your one of these types of parents that react like this? I would like to discuss the issue if anyone has any comments?

Neither myself nor my kids are afraid of dogd. However, I find it very rude of owners to let their stinky dog, whose just licked it's own bollox, come and lick my children!!! If I let one of my children run over to complete strangers, shove them around a bit, stick his nose in their crotch and then attempt to eat their picnic I would expect to get evil stares! I keep my charges under control and so should you, and if it's a public place, that means on a lead! IMHO!

3000 attacks by dogs in an average year according to this article
5868 attacks in England and Wales in 2003-4

I expect all of those dogs' owners thought their dogs were well-trained, and maybe even medal-winners. I don't trust dogs on principle and I don't trust their owners either.

If I witnessed the sort of OP incident in a local park that you seem to think is mainly the fault of the parents, haychee, I'd report you and your dogs to the local Police Community Support team, and to the local council.

Agreed kama but surely one that regularly attends training will be better controlled than one that isnt? How do sniffer dogs get so good at what they are asked to do? training!

hatrickjacqueline
Apparently not! Marina has just gone out of her way to produce statistics to show the bad side of dogs!
Good dogs do exist, playful harmless dogs do exist, well trained dogs do exist.
And, you will encounter them at your local park! Of course there are the bad that is why i teach my children never to approach another unkown dog unless i say its ok or they have asked the owner. The trouble with my children is that they think every dog they meet will be as placid as mine, when unfotunatley we all know they arent.

None of those incidents were caused by sniffer dogs, police dogs or guide dogs for the blind though, I bet.
I googled those statistics in about 30 seconds. There's a lot of information about this subject in the UK, because...it's such a problem.
I think poorly supervised dogs in public places, and the astonishing complacency of their doting owners, is much more of a hazard than my child being stalked by molesters on the London Underground

What if you don't know the owner though? You can't trust people to be good judges of their pets. They're too besotted and start from the principle that dogs are lovable.

No i bet none of these incidents were made by any well trained dog - that is why my dogs medals should not be mocked.

I've been far too drawn into this today than it merits - but - taking a step back, what this is all about is: haychee has had a not quite one-off, but very particular, recent experience with a parent with an aggressive manner, in a place where haychee thought what she was doing didn't deserve that reaction.

Had haychee done an OP that said: "today I was walking my dog in a designated dogs-off-leads area and somebody swore at me to put the dog back on its lead. Am I unreasonable to feel upset?" - she'd have got sympathy, plus a bit of kind reality-check about how people can appear unreasonable when they are frightened. End of story.

Instead she tried to make it into a debate on principle, with arguments that are weak from the outset and get weaker and weaker with each bit of defensiveness and denial and, well, spin.

So: haychee, yes, you are NOT unreasonable to have felt upset when that woman swore at you. That much is OK. But it doesn't mean she was unreasonable to have been frightened. And I hope that at least some of this thread has given you food for thought - blu's and peanutbear's contributions in particular.

Dogs are on the whole loveable, its the owners that ruin their good natures by lack of training or lack of exercise.

The scenario that was in respect of the op was that dogs were just passing the family not paying any attention to them sniffing around in the bushes etc. Every time the dog got near the mother would pick up the child. At first the child was only a little worried but became increasingly distressed because of the way the mother was making such a fuss - i mean the dogs never got within 5metres of the child i wouldnt of allowed them to get so close to a worried child.

Haycee - unless your dog has his medals pinned to his chest the average parent does not know that your dog is well trained.

That is why they pick up their kids when you dog chases them for fun.

It 'ain't that difficult to grasp.

Well i LOATH dogs of any size or shape..i am absolutely terrified of them, always have been.
I cannot be near them and the hairs on my arms and neck stand on end if one comes any where near me. I physically shake and feel sick.

I get madder than mad when the fuckwit owner says " ahh, he's only bieng friendly"

"wants to say hello"

NO, get your fucking animal away from me and my kid......NOT EVERY ONE LIKES DOGS.... do not force them on people.

Keep them on leads, keep the bloody lead wound IN and pick up the shit when the bloody thing squats.

I want to go to the park with my kid and not be sniffed by some thing that has just licked its own scrotum, shat in the grass where my kid is walking and following people round while the fecking owner looks proudly on........

Sorry, but im not going to carry on because we are clashing BIG time in our opinions.

I haven't read all of this conversation so don't know the full story.
However my 2 year old has begun to have a fear of dogs. We were walking along a path from my mum's house when we came across two ladies, who both had 2 little dogs each. My son was interested in them as he always has been but has also been wary of them, which I think is a good thing. However these dogs came running around him, barking and yapping and one of them jumped right up at him. I realise it was only being friendly, but to a toddler it must have been very scary, having this dog jump up, and who then came to his shoulders. He got quite distressed. Up until this point I had never made a big fuss about dogs as he was naturally wary of the them, so when I saw these dogs I didn't make a fuss, just said come on this way to him. After this incident he now has a fear of them and even if one is lying down on a path he just freezes and won't even walk past it, let alone get close to it. It's difficult as I don't really know what the best thing is to do now we are in this situation.

The scenario that was in respect of the op was that dogs were just passing the family not paying any attention to them sniffing around in the bushes etc. Every time the dog got near the mother would pick up the child. At first the child was only a little worried but became increasingly distressed because of the way the mother was making such a fuss - i mean the dogs never got within 5metres of the child i wouldnt of allowed them to get so close to a worried child.

And, if the child or its parents have this obvious distaste and fear of dogs what are they doing visiting a place where there are lots of dogs off leads?! Astonishing!

dogs on the whole are not lovable, they slobber, stink and have been known to attack people

certainly didn't find the dog that attacked our cat and bit both dh and myself 'lovable'

Of course they should be on leads in a public place. I remember a couple of years ago enjoying an idlyllic picnic on Wimbledon common with my children when 2 huge dogs came racing up from nowhere and in virtually one gulp swallowed our ENTIRE lunch. The dog owner didn't even apologise, just looked rather shamefaced. All of us were left openmouthed, not to mention hungry.

That is because your looking out and listening to only the bad sides of dogs. There are good dogs with good owners they do actually exist! There are sniffer dogs, guide dogs etc which with the right training are capable of doing amazing things. It is very unfair to tar every dog with the same brush as those you hear of in the news.

Dog lovers don't find dogs disgusting though. They find all that sniffing around in the shit quite endearing.

its just natural for a dog to sniff, doesnt make it disgusting.