AIBU to hate baby language

[PorridgeLove]

DS is 2 years old . We have just talked to him in a normal way and his language has developed very well. At nursery, they talk to the kids in a normal way, too. It drives me bonkers when someone talks to him in a baby voice or uses baby language. He does not enjoy it either because, frankly, I think he does not understand what they are trying to get at.

AIBU to be annoyed when family and friends try baby language on him?

Somebody mentioned the high pitched thing. My mum does that. I had hearing difficulties as a child and could hear higher pitches easier. Then we got a dog, who responded to the same pitches. Now the grandchildren get it, even though they are all blessed with normal human hearing. But there is a point to it, it does aid hearing!

Haha - yeah I use baby talk for some words (nap nap for nappy; night night for sleep; yum yums for yummy food). Interspersed with normal adult words. Do you want to eat yum yums? Sound more natural to me than do you want to eat some food/lunch? Do you need to change your nappy? Vs change nap nap?

At 20 months he’s growing out of it all v fast though....

YABU, as almost everyone has pointed out, motherese aids in speech and language development. I find it weirder when people talk to a baby or toddler as if they were chatting to 53 year old Graham next door about the planning permission for his new conservatory.

Adults say ta where I’m from though so that doesn’t bother me.
I also used a baby voice with dd, I couldn’t help it, but I don’t like I changed many words- apart from bot bot for bottle. She grew out of it and is a perfect talker so I’m not sure it matters.

But why is nap nap easier for the child than than nappy? I could understand shortening the word if a nappy was actually called a "fecal cloth changerator" or something complex, but substituting nap nap for a word like nappy (which is already short and ending in an ie sound) seems redundant.

I'm perfectly happy with Ta to start with as it means they can say some form of Thank You (along with signing it if you take your DC to signing lessons)
Then when they are capable of saying Thank You, they do.

*i don’t think

And a lot of the time the baby words people use are based on the words the baby uses as they start talking

Oh get over yourself. I have a 2yo who, on his 2y check this week was smashing his 3yo milestones. People and I still speak to him like a baby because he is one. Get a grip.

@FineWordsForAPorcupine I don’t think it’s always that the word is easier, I think in some cases people just can’t help the baby voice. Bot bot is no easier than bottle, but her little baby face just made me say weird things. Hard to explain I guess some people just don’t have the baby talk urge.

but her little baby face just made me say weird things

I suppose that's fair enough - my parents' dog has a face that makes me ask all sorts of redundant questions, like "who's the best dog in the world, is it you, its you though look at those ears" etc, so possibly I am not immune :)

@Stayawayfromitsmouth my 6 month old daughter can't say "Thank you" but she can say "Ta".

@AuntieStella motherese isn't the preferred term any more. It's known as child directed speech now and it can actually be helpful when kids are developing language.

Nothing wrong with what they call motherese but I agree with the posters saying using these strange words or terms that you would never ordinarily use is a bit odd. I remember being in a baby group and someone was waving a toy at a boy around 10 months saying "Wo da? Wo da?" instead of "What's that?". I had no idea why she felt she had to speak like this, seems counter intuitive to me.

My Dd says ta 😩🙈 I thought it was cute 😩 she’s 2 and can’t say thank you, I’m going to practice tomorrow 😂

We are from a “posher” area too 😩

There's nothing wrong with ta. Language comes in its own time and while you can help kids to learn if they're not ready they're not ready.

My ex hated people using baby talk too and was very superior and critical that people did it but for me it was naturally what came out. I did a wee bit of research back then 13 years ago and found the research showed high pitch and exaggeration was shown to help with language development.... “motherese”or whatever it’s called now. Certainly didn’t hinder my kids, my eldest had over a hundred words at 14 months and spoke in full sentences at 19 months. At nursery, they called him the professor 😂 (he’s just normally bright now, not a genius!). Second son spoke early but it was not such an extreme contrast with the other toddlers as first son. Third was more with the mainstream though - but he definitely got less of the singing and baby talk because I had the other two to deal with.

I think the simplified sounds like 'who da?' help children develop language earlier than sophisticated sounds like 'who's that?'

Tellytubby language appealed to babies because the language matched their ability to discriminate sounds.

It's the aural equivalent of those black and white Lamaze (?) pictures. Simplified to allow babies to discriminate.

Nothing wrong with ‘Ta.’ Where I’m from its perfectly normal.

I used to think the same was as you OP but soon learnt very quickly that it is one of the most natural things to do as a parent and I decided not to fight it. As others have pointed out, there’s a reason we’re compelled to do it. Anecdata of course but my 6 year old has a wider vocabulary than me and not a baby word among them. They grow out of it astonishingly quickly by themselves.

And a lot of the time the baby words people use are based on the words the baby uses as they start talking

This too. My 1 year old has a few words and we tend to use her words with her. She’s a cracking little communicator.

You’d have a point if your child were to be still using choo-choo when he’s heading to secondary school, OP, but oddly that never seems to be the case even for those poor children who were exposed to constant babytalk. It’s almost like language acquisition were some mysterious ongoing process rather than something they can only do for a fixed period during infancy and toddlerhood. Relax.

mainly because alot of them don't understand unless I talk that way.

What a load of tosh.

Children learn the richness of language from having as much variety and access to it as possible. If a child has a speech impediment it's unlikely to be because someone has said dada or doggy to them. Inflections, pitch and facial expressions are exactly how babies learn to speak.

I say ta, I thought that was a regional thing?

I also used motherese with my DDs. Babies respond well to those patterns of tone, speech and pitch.

Our first was talking in sentences by 18 months, she still said cute things (cumbarbar -cucumber), but they all grow out of it... I haven't though, I still say cumbarbar .

And a lot of the time the baby words people use are based on the words the baby uses as they start talking

DD has always called her milk "nook" for some reason. We thought it was funny and cute, because she often would wake in the night all sleepy saying "noooook, NOOOK!!!".

She knows it is milk now, and she can almost say it, but I will admit to sometimes slipping into "do you want your nook?" and anyone in the vicinity probably thinks I'm being completely silly, but it just caught on