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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To move out of London to Northern Ireland?

181 replies

InternetArgument · 23/03/2019 18:37

I realised the other day that I have been trying not to think about all the reasons I’m anxious about staying in london. I have one 2 year old and another on the way.

I’ve had enough of the stress of living here. I have a large house, very small mortgage and it is lovely in one of the nicest areas in the locality.

Im sick of the crime, stress and pollution. DH and I both have ties to Ireland and we have been to the north before and loved it - city, town and country.

AIBU to want to cash out and run to the hills?

Thinking of near Derry or Belfast.

OP posts:
Alsohuman · 23/03/2019 19:28

It's a fabulous place to bring up children. Great schools. And low property prices. We have family there and their quality of life's much better than ours.

S1naidSucks · 23/03/2019 19:29

Good idea. No drugs or violence in Northern Ireland.

There’s always one. Hmm

yanboo · 23/03/2019 19:32

@Howzaboutye yes it’s lovely and so are the people. I loved chatting to other mums when we went there on holiday (north coast). The way the kids were - just playing out and exploring and having fun - it reminded DH of his childhood (and me mine).

Pollution will get better with the ULEZ @BigglyBoggly but the crime won’t - it’s getting worse. We found out our local car thief/car damager (😡) got arrested and found guilty but has been released again and the keying, smashing of windows and mirrors, and theft of items and cars has started again. If you get burgled, your car stolen, mugged, threatened with a knife or menaced in public the police do nothing and everyone knows that. They don’t come out for intruders in the garden as my neighbour found out recently and the only reason people contact them now is to get acrime number.

I will never move back. Everything is so stressful and i don’t feel safe any more. Not all the time but I notice when I don’t now, and that’s quite often.

Im going over again to have a look before I have DC#2 and I expect it will be hard to come back at all.

buckeejit · 23/03/2019 19:32

We moved back 7 years ago from Manchester. We are totally skint now but hey ho, life is great. I love this country. No stress & can pop to one of many beaches every weekend if we want. So good for dc

Bigglyboggly · 23/03/2019 19:32

In fairness to NI, I have never been mugged / seen people be mugged in broad daylight as has happened many, many times in London. It’s insanely safe here in comparison. Was at a schools club recently and a nice mum in the loos left her huge designer wallet and keys to her 60k 4x4 sitting by the sink while she went to the loo, the Londoner in me was like Shock.

Be ready for a crazy amount of the population to have a ginormous shiny car.

MadeinBelfast · 23/03/2019 19:35

I moved to NI with small children, mainly because of the quality of schools here. There are many good things about the it but I'd agree about waiting for Brexit to be sorted out (if that ever happens). There is a real undertone of uncertainty about the place at the moment and if we do get a hard border I'm quite worried about what might happen.
If you are totally new to the area it can also be difficult to make friends. It's a small place and everyone knows everyone and has done for years so breaking into friendship groups can be a bit more difficult than in more transient cities. Saying that, people are generally very chatty and interested in what brings you here!

yanboo · 23/03/2019 19:37

buckeejit I can happily accept being skint, as I want to SAHM and that would be impossible here.

Biggly- will DH finally get his big shiny jeep then? I know he’s always wanted one and he likes to fit in 😆

LadyGregorysToothbrush · 23/03/2019 19:43

But you’d get to eat Tayto every day, so there’s a bright side..

It’s the abomination that is Nordie Tayto though...

yanboo · 23/03/2019 19:44

I forgot to say that the schools do look great. We love the outdoors no are used to rain. If that’s all we moan about I’ll be happy.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 23/03/2019 19:46

It’s the abomination that is Nordie Tayto though.

If she goes to Derry she’ll be alright. Easy access to the proper ones. Grin

Tunnockswafer · 23/03/2019 19:46

Nordie Tayto comes from a castle. You can’t beat that with your fake Tayto. Grin (Disclaimer: have only ever eaten one kind of Tayto)

Inniu · 23/03/2019 19:51

Having previously lived in NI and still having immediate family there I find there is always a strong undercurrent of sectarianism.
It is less expensive to have a nice lifestyle there but for me it wasn’t worth it.

scratchbass · 23/03/2019 19:58

We made the move, no kids yet. Our salaries are lower but so is the cost of living so no real difference for us in terms of disposable income. Quality of life is good, and we're never far away from some beautiful places. A lot of people have caravans/second homes around the coast. London house prices will go far in NI - our Rightmove equivalent is www.propertynews.com if you fancy a browse!

NI has its own problems and the politics are ridiculous, but I just don't get involved with that Smile

12548ehe9fnfobms · 23/03/2019 20:00

How does it work re sectarianism if you are a mixed family? by that I mean that 1 is irish (southern) decent & the other is english? Both atheists? does that mean everyone is suspicious of you? genuine question.

isabellerossignol · 23/03/2019 20:01

How does it work re sectarianism if you are a mixed family? by that I mean that 1 is irish (southern) decent & the other is english? Both atheists? does that mean everyone is suspicious of you? genuine question.

If you live in a 'nice middle class area' no one will give a damn. Honestly. And even if you don't, the vast majority of people will still not give a damn.

Bigglyboggly · 23/03/2019 20:02

Yes it will be a moral failing if he doesn’t, you should see how people look at our perfectly respectable by London standards 8yr old estate car! But we have moved to an NI naice area so that slants my view!

Bigglyboggly · 23/03/2019 20:04

I am Protestant and DH from phenomenally Catholic background and we have precisely zero problems at all. Seriously.

jollyjester · 23/03/2019 20:18

My DH commutes to London 4 days a week from NI. We were both born and bred here and did live in London for a while but after DC appeared we moved back.

Yes there are things we miss but those tend to be things we did pre DC anyway that we wouldn't be doing now.

Baby groups, these are mostly church run around my area but no one bats an eyelid if you dont go to the church.

If you end up Armagh direction (not sure why you would but the M1 is handy for a Belfast commute) give me a PM and I'll happily meet up some time!

Minesapineappledelight · 23/03/2019 20:34

You can come over, but fgs don't tell your friends in London or they'll all be coming over Grin

Minesapineappledelight · 23/03/2019 20:35

Also in a mixed marriage and prone to dossing round Strangford on bikes, and no problems here either

My feet are nailed to the ground, Brexit be damned.

Bigglyboggly · 23/03/2019 20:43

Aw pineapple could have given you a nice mixed-marriage wave as we cycled past.

Iflyaway · 23/03/2019 20:44

Good idea. No drugs or violence in Northern Ireland.

WTF?! Ever been there? Or read up on the history?

FFS!

ILoveMaxiBondi · 23/03/2019 20:47

I feel like we should be having MN meet-ups in strangford Grin i’ll Bring the tayto.

hopeishere · 23/03/2019 20:47

I think I was sarcasm @Iflyaway

Agree if you go for a "naice middle class" area you'll be fine.

Lolo1845 · 23/03/2019 20:47

Love living in northern Ireland. I'm in the derry area. Good jobs can be hard to come by. But excellent schools and parks for children. I personally find London to fast paced. It's a much calmer way of life here.

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