Things that are crap - cunningly upsold

[MyKingdomForACaramel]

Have just attempted to make a sandwich using “toasty bread”... bread fell apart - but tbh it’s also rubbish as toast. So am I right in thinking that along with “naked burgers” it’s all a big con, and aibu to ask - what crappy products you have been “upsold”?

The penis.

wednesdayrobyn I fear you're in for a bit of a shock when your toddler starts school. Though £5k might be an exaggeration: we paid £2k for a 3 bed villa in Longleat last August. But that's before food and activities

Clinique Dramatically Different Moisturising Lotion ..... if ever a name was a total lie ... absolutey nothing dramatically different about it whatsoever. Just a very basic moisturiser with a massively over inflated price.

Posh paint

Cordless vacuums.

Fell for two. Both drop piles of grit as soon as I hit the off switch Both destined for a million years in landfill

I have just bought a cheapie stick convertible at about a third of the price which does a better job despite the annoyance of having to replug a couple of times.

The Jorgen Viking Centre (especially the ride) in York. Massive queues and loads of advertising, and it was so much smaller than expected. The ride was also crap - think the Stars Hollow museum in Gilmore Girls...

Easter eggs. They're bloody hollow and there's no more chocolate in them than a large chocolate bar, but they're super expensive and crap quality chocolate.

Kickers boots/ shoes, why do they look orthopaedic after a few weeks when they cost too bloody much for a teen?

Crocs- enough said

Rechargeable/cordless hoovers. I bought an AEG one. Takes 4 hours to charge and runs out after 2 rooms after it's condescended to pick up two bits of fluff and spat the rest back out. I kick the fecking thing every time I walk past it. Clearly designed for people who live alone with no pets and have only one room that is 2 ft square. £300 it cost me and I had to buy a mains hoover on top which completely defeated the point of it!

Um already baked potatoes, take 5 minutes in the microwave, why would you cook them in the oven?! It’s about convenience lol

Expensive cafes. A pot of tea is a pot of tea.

Easter eggs really aren't "super expensive" now are they? The excess packaging is an issue but Easter eggs are cheaper this year (in relative terms) than they have ever been.

The £600 a night in Centre Parcs thread is one of my fondest memories of this site (although I did have a lot of sympathy with her situation).

Painkillers that "target" certain types of pain, eg Feminx, cold and flu, its all just paracetamol. The stuff in the 39p packet does the job.

Most expensive chocolate, still not tried one I really like (and I've tried numerous) and think is worth paying extra for.

Winter wonderland in london hyde park. What a pile of overpriced shite.

Oats so Simple.

Literally, small amounts of porridge oats portioned out. Its like paying a pound for two slices of bread.

child birth. WTF. I'd grow them all in a lab if I could

Big houses. They cost a lot more to buy, the council tax is expensive, they cost more to heat and they take a lot longer to clean. Plus your extra rooms just become dumping rooms for stuff you don't need.

itsstillgood - Cadbury World - disappointing ...but then I've always thought it was because I expected it to be just like 'Charlie and the chocolate factory' ...and it's nothing like that!

Personalised number plates. Your car is just as old as mine is 5teve.

Ironing Water - has knackered the last few irons I have had and I still dont learn.

Sugar free sweets - I react badly to sorbitol and it is in most weight watcher sweets. The fruitella sugar free sweets should come with a health warning if you read the reports of what it does to a lot of people (do not venture far from the loo after consumption)

TinselAndKnickers and Ronsters totally agree that the Feminax that you buy off the shelf is crap and just ibuprofen. Feminax Ultra that you get behind the pharmacy counter on the other hand is Naproxen (a usually only prescription only NSAID and is fantastic for period pain. I use it regularly and it helped get my daughter through her A levels as she suffered terribly with cramps.

Best worst thing ever is a beauty product from the noughties called Michael Kors Leg Shine. I saw it in all the mags and hugely coveted it. It looked like a brown deodorant stick and I imagined it giving me Beyonce-esque pins.

Then years later the Internet was invented and I read the reviews. Biggest, shittest waste of money ever. Did nothing. Smelled weird. Cost a fortune.

Still vaguely covet it, mind.

hard to get that feminax ultra i getmine online now

my iron specifucally says dont use ironing water destroys the inside apprently

ITV - I never watch it, never record from it and very rarely see anything on there I think "Oooh! I'll watch that". Always feels like a lot of very simplistic viewing for the masses. I don't doubt there's some good, high quality programming on there but I never seem to spot it on the TV guide when it's on.

Plus Lorraine Kelly, Piers Morgan and Jeremy Kyle.

Channel 5 is also similar but there is the odd occasional weird documentary-style show on there that justtttt about saves it.

Expensive mascaras. My eyes are so sensitive that even Benefit makes them water like I've been watching Marley And Me. The only one that I've been able to get on with is the £2 Primark waterproof stuff.

@SimonitesSocks the hard bit of a jacket potato at the bottom is my favourite bit 😂