. . . to be completely mystified by what just happened?!

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Just had a physio appointment for a suspected sprained Achilles.

Expectation: I would go in, give a history, physio would examine me, move me around a bit, look at my posture/alignment etc., maybe an ultrasound of the area, given some exercises to do and told to come back in a week.

What actually happened:
Laid flat on my back, made to do knee raises and leg lifts while he tapped the soles of my feet, abruptly slapped my calf muscles, poked around my knee with a sharp wooden stick, told to touch the side of my neck with two fingers, and he even occasionally tapped me on the nose.

Yes. TAPPED ME ON THE NOSE.

I left, completely bewildered, with tape along my calf muscle.

I have no idea what just happened. I was so shocked that when he replied "functional neurology" to my question of "er . . . so, what was that?!" I just accepted it, said thank you, smiled and left.

AIBU to think that was an absolute waste of £50?!

None of my physio appointments every looked like that, what an odd experience!

This sounds like one of the Smack the Pony sketches...

You accidentally walked onto the set of the money pithon reunion you silly billy.

Could have been worse... m.youtube.com/watch?v=FczIrs0GGz4

Is it rocktape he put on your calf?

That sounds very odd, are you sure the person you saw was a proper physiotherapist?

The nose tapping - just wtf???

What did the sign above the door say?

Was it definitely a qualified physio and not a chiropractor? I saw one of those once, he tried to tell me that the long term, clinical depression I wasn’t there to see him about could be overcome with a choice to be happy and homeopathy. I did not go back.

did he tape you on the nose to distract you whilst poking somewhere else?

(and by somewhere else I mean around the calf area!)

You can check if they are a registered physiotherapist here
www.hcpc-uk.org/check-the-register/
It doesn’t sound like any kind of musculoskeletal assessment that I’ve ever seen or done

I'm reminded of friends when Ross pretends to be a masseuse and uses wooden spoons!

Check if this 'physio' is actually registered with their professional body.

I am laughing at the britishness of it all. Smiling politely and even thanking them on leaving! Classic British behaviour .

The key question is: Are you feeling any better/healed?

Because if so, he's a miracle worker!!!!

Ah the old "nose tap and calf wobble" technique. Standard treatment for a sprained Achilles of course.

Does sound more like reflex testing than physio. How odd. Will there be a results appointment?

He tapped you on the nose?! I've seen lots of photos for various running injuries none have ever tapped my nose. Sounds a bit dodgy (and funny) sorry.

Are you sure he was a registered Nosetappologist?

Sounds like chiropractic woo to me.

Sadly my ankle is still swollen and painful so I think I may have to resort to more traditional methods!

Oh, that's another weird thing, I asked him if I should take ibuprofen (thinking an anti-inflammatory would help) and he said "no, I disagree with pain relief" . . . huh?! But my poor little brain was already reeling too much to cope with that one too 😁

I'll check if he's registered but it's a proper fancy clinic in the city centre, and I had definitely booked a "new patient musculoskeletal assessment" . . . I do need to google "functional neurology" to see if it makes any sense.

I'm giggling at these responses . . . !

Did you not know, when Achilles' mother, the immortal Thetis, dipped her baby son in the river Styx in an attempt to confer invulnerability, she held him by his ankle and his nose? All becomes clear...

Yeah "disagree with pain relief" sounds like a chiropractor...

Maybe it was Emotional Freedom Technique? My mum got me to go for that once, the woman tried to cure me of a fear of wasps/needles by getting me to tap on the side of my hand and saying that I release the fear

Sorry OP but that is too funny! Definitely double check what the business actually was and what you had booked.