To take my children on holiday for Xmas?

[Isawthesignanditopenedupmyeyes]

Not a stealth post, I work long hard hours and I’ve seen a bargain holiday to the sun for Xmas that I can afford. I struggle with Xmas at home as have no family other than my DH and DC and would dearly love to get away. I miss my mum so much at Xmas and find it really hard seeing friends having big family Xmases. So you would think it’s a no brainier but my DC (10 and 12) desperately want to stay at home for Christmas. They don’t believe in Santa but cynically I think they know they will get less to open on Christmas Day if we are away, although I appreciate they also just want to be in their own home. They really, really don’t want to go. DH wants to go.
I’m thinking about just booking it anyway and I’m sure they will have a nice time.
AIBU?

This is surely an occasion where your - or any - DC do NOT get to rule the roost for once. It's not up to them. You're the adult. If you and DH want to go, go.

Have an amazing trip and, er, Merry Christmas!

I would not go. Not for Christmas. I know it's hard for you, but I think you should suck it up for the kids and once they're older and don't care / have their own families then you do what you want.

Ultimately it's your call. YANBU to want a year away.

Is there a middle way? Flying out on boxing day so you can have a low key Christmas packing?

I wouldn’t book it. For me holidays are about what everyone will enjoy, if some members of the family don’t feel they will enjoy it, I think that’s valid.

It's your decision. Not up to them.
By November they'll like have changed their minds.

Nah Christmas is for kids. If they don't want to go I wouldn't make them.

Hmm...mixed views. I really, really want to go!

GO!

And if they're really bothered about the number of presents they'll have to open (my son was adamant he believed in Santa last Christmas for this reason - his sister told us!!!) then speak with them and explain that presents will happen before or after the holiday.

Just go, Christmas is Christmas wherever you are. You’re allowed to put yourself first - and you should.

No sorry Christmas is for DCs and mine- like yours - would be gutted if he wasn't at home for Christmas. Can you leave on Boxing day instead that means you all get what you want ?

just go and have an xmas day at home when you get back.

A similar situation here.

I think the biggest problem here is that you succumb to what the ideal Christmas should be and if you feel that you can’t have it, the answer is to go away so that the emotions don’t need to be dealt with. I did this. Especially when we no longer had extended family around. So we have started to create our own traditions. We like to do a panto or cinema on the eve. Lots of board games on Christmas Day and then we try and get away Boxing Day.

I did go away one year for Christmas. Never again! Loved the holiday but I realised how much I enjoyed being at home with DH and DC on Christmas Day.

If you really really want to go, just ask your husband and kids what they would like and go from there! The kids should be told it will mean less presents and allowed to decide if that suits them. At that age I would have gone for the holiday, but then we had very few sun holidays.

I would ask them if there's anything specific they don't like about the idea. E.g. if it's just the presents, you can explain that although you might not be able to bring them all to open on the holiday, they can have the others to open early before you go. Or if it's the Christmas dinner, you can plan to do that on another day. Or whatever.

We have gone away at Christmas for the past 4 years, our dcs were 7 and 8 when we first went, they would rather be at home.
It is the only really quiet time for DH to get away for a fortnight, and so l explain this to them, and do a full Christmas day, family/tree/present/opening/Christmas dinner on the day after we return.

They do enjoy being in the sea endlessly once we are there though, and it does give us all a winter energy boost. Most importantly l feel it is good for the Dcs to understand DH deserves a holiday and this is really the only time.

Can you have an open conversation about why they don't want to go away and see if there is a way to satisfy them as well as getting the holiday? Eg if it's about presents (clearly they won't be able to take many if you are flying) perhaps agree that they can have some on Xmas eve, a few on the holiday, and the rest when you get back. If it's about their idea of what you 'should' do at Xmas (eg own home, TV etc) again- could you agree to have a day or so doing this before/after the holiday.

We went away for Xmas a couple of times and all loved it- my DC would jump at the chance to do it again

What do they think they will miss out on and won't being on holiday with waterparks, sun, snow or whatever it features more than make up for it?

I love a traditional family Christmas- but let's face it the weather is so grey and gloomy.
I've had Christmas skiing and on a tropical beach a couple of time and they were brilliant, much more memorable

You should do it, we did it last year and it was one of the best holidays I have ever had.
We are looking again for this year, would you mind me asking what company you saw the deal with ?

You’re the adult. Do you always let your children chose your holiday destination? Either book it or let your kids rule the roost.

Personally I wouldn't

We used to go away just before christmas and come back 23rd/24th - would that be an option for you?

Or the other way - wake up at home on christmas day and then go on holiday late 25th or on 26th

@Alsohuman you put your kids first, especially at Christmas!

I would go! The children are at an age when you tell them what's happening!! Enjoy!

You’re the adult. Do you always let your children chose your holiday destination?

I don’t know about the OP but DD and I always choose our holiday destinations together.

Yes OP is the adult but the point here is that it's nice that DCs enjoy Christmas at home so much and as DCs it's likely in a few more years they won't care as much about where it's held.