To let 7 year old walk to and from school alone?

[RLE2]

DS is in year 3, we live about a 10 minute walk away from the school. We live in a quiet area, he won't be near any busy roads, the only roads he has to cross is our road and the school road. The school road isn't too busy as it's only people going to the school using it and our road is empty apart from neighbours. Is 7 too young? It's not unheard of for year 3's to walk by themselves at his school but most still walk with a parent, a few don't

I suppose I find it weird why you would want your 5 year old to be that independent. I loved the school run with DS when he was at Primary School. We lived 8 miles from his school so we drove, not sure whether those in European countries would think that was a suitable distance for a 5 year old to walk to school.

We would have nice chats on the way to and from school. We would park a distance away from the school and walk the rest, so didn't add to the mayhem of the traffic near the school gates. Once DS was dropped off I would chat with other parents as they were friends, I was also involved with a number of community things so could catch up with people for that. I also helped out at the school regularly so needed to be there for that. There was a nice community feel about the school. I assume you miss out on that if you send your 5 year old on their way.

I assume TheKitchenWitch the children may walk without parents, but in most cases they are surrounded by other children of various ages, so not completely walking on their own, and possibly relying on the slightly older children for help crossing the road, as at 5 their judgement of speed and distance of oncoming cars is not accurate. For outlying families do you have school buses, or do those children have to walk long distances totally on their own?

It's very interesting, the kinds of arguments that people come up to rationalise culturally reinforced anxiety. Even when presented with examples from other, comparable countries, data on reduced crime. And yet if you tried a different approach, maybe other friends and neighbours would join and you would have a group of children happily and confidently making their own way?

I am not in the UK and my DD has been going to school without accompanying adults since age 7.5. Not on her own - in a group of friends, on bicycles and scooters. It is about 1 km and three roads to cross, the busy road has pedestrian crossing. She is also allowed to visit neighbourhood friends on her own. Actually all the neighbourhood children roam around freely, including my 5.5 DS and other 5 and even 4 year Olds, visiting each other, dropping in for a play, building huts in gardens. We will often have 5 or 6 kids on the sofa watching a film It's actually very similar to how I grew up although I lived in an old European city. But had a similar level of freedom.

As always on these threads I wonder why the UK has become so fearful of child independence.

And I wonder why so many people equate being alone to being independent. They are not the same thing.

Children under 8 cant judge speed or distance?
Is this just UK children? Why is that?
In my home country we walk to school from 4/5, even getting the metro.

Children under 8 cant judge speed or distance?
Is this just UK children?

I'm sure sadly children die on the roads in other countries, not just the UK.

My child did reception in the uk then moved to Switzerland. Walking alone at that age would have been unthinkable where we lived in the uk, mainly because of cars reversing out of driveways (mostly to drive children to school...), but it felt safe and was a positive experience in Switzerland as everyone was walking.

The culture is very different - at 7 my child was given detention for not paying attention on the way to school as she'd hurt her head walking into a lamp post!

I feel its far too young tbh

The not judging distance and speed thing was in a road safety leaflet given to us by the police when DS was at Primary School.

I would start by just gradually letting him finish the walk a bit further each time.. let him walk to school and then gradually start meeting him further away from the school.

I have a 7 year old and he walks to and from school.He does have older brothers but he often doesnt walk with them.
You could do a trial run and see how it goes

Exactly @beresh, it is all about the culture and nothing to do with danger, not being able to judge speed, not being able to pay attention.
It's really important to support them in gaining appropriate independence, for their confidence and healthy development.

Number of children attending school in the UK: 8.2 million
Number of children killed or seriously injured in a road traffic collision where the child is a pedestrian: 2,000 (it hovers around this figure most years)

So 0.025%.

0.025%. Of course it's hideous if your child is in that 0.025% and no one wishes that on anyone but that shows just how unlikely it is that your child will be injured on the way to school.

I’m the most relaxed in our group dd walked alone from yr 5

No none of my DC were allowed to play out until year 6. They didnt walk to school alone until year 7. All of them are independent and now use various forms of public transport without an issue.
Making a child walk to school alone doesn't necessarily make them independent. I walked alone from primary school age and it didnt work for me at all.

shatners

There are other risks though, not just being seriously injured/killed.

While your statistics show low risk in terms of being hit by a car, they don't see into account any other factors.

So from PP above, 2000 kids are killed or seriously injured in road traffic accidents (when the child is a pedestrian) and from a quick Google around 50 are abducted by strangers every year in the UK. Really small figures but the risk to my children of both of those will be absolutely zero because I'll be there to keep them safe. That's no judgement on others, if you are happy with that small risk that's your choice to make.

I don't think that a 16 year old is not going to be able to cross a road, use a sharp knife or navigate public transport because they haven't been doing it since they were 7. They are learned skills, which don't take long to master.

We also don't live in the same world anymore - the skills you need to survive (in a South East suburb in my case) are not chopping wood and foraging for food but a good CV and a decent credit rating

I'll be teaching my kids independence by allowing them to take responsibility for looking after their bodies (hygiene and health), education and finances. They don't need to be pitted against adults or older children without good intentions and road traffic at 7 to be fully rounded adults.

Why do you keep on saying "alone" when in most cases (other countries) children walk in groups? And why do you talk about "making them"? My daughter and her friends want to cycle to school together because it is more fun. Most children enjoy socialising with other children.
If my daughter wanted us to take her, we would do it, if course (actually one of us is going to school every morning because we have to take her little brother who is not yet ready to go without adults). She always tells us if something unusual happens during their commute. But they prefer to go in their own group and are really good when it comes to looking after each other.

Why do you keep on saying "alone" when in most cases (other countries) children walk in groups?

Perhaps because OP said her DS would be walking alone, unless he could meet a friend, so people are responding to the fact that the child in question was to be walking alone.

Please be careful! I was sexually abused and almost abducted at the age of seven when I walked alone to school one day after going home for lunch.

And yet if you tried a different approach, maybe other friends and neighbours would join and you would have a group of children happily and confidently making their own way?

That’s sort-of what happened here. I let mine walk to school and got roundly tutted at and reported to the school three times before the HT stopped telling me someone had said something (I was already the irresponsible one who let her kids play out - always my fault btw, never DH).

Then another family moved in and the kids played out and walked to school, which made someone else think the group walking was safer so allowed theirs.

Now most of the kids play out, drivers are expected to be careful coming in and out of driveways (the local PCSO is good at reminding idiot drivers that it’s their job to check th pavement is clear before crossing it as we had a couple move in who were terrible for just beeping a horn and pulling out a second late) and when the HT tried the whole “we won’t let them leave with out an adult until x year” he was quickly reminded that’s not his call to make.

Really small figures but the risk to my children of both of those will be absolutely zero because I'll be there to keep them safe

Walking along with a child does not make the risk of getting knocked down zero. It reduces it but it doesn't make it zero.

While your statistics show low risk in terms of being hit by a car, they don't see into account any other factors

What other factors?

I'm not saying there are no risks, but that the risks are very small. What risks parents choose to take or not to take is absolutely their business, but it should be looked at in relation to the facts. Managing risk appropriately. Obviously if the roads are busy main roads, risk may be higher than a minor road.

What I am pointing out is that the suggestion from some posters that it's nonsense to talk about what it was like 40 years ago because there are more cars now and therefore a child is more likely to be killed by a car is factually incorrect. Children are LESS likely to be hit or killed by a car now than 40 years ago - TEN TIMES LESS.

Similarly, there is no factual evidence to suggest that "stranger danger" is worse now than it was 40 years ago, despite population having increased. Your child is far more likely to be abused in their own home or that of a family member than on their way to school (90% of all abuse being committed by a family member).

..and that is it, the more kids are driven to schools, the worse the traffic is, making cycling, walking etc less and less pleasant and popular. And the higher the chance of traffic accidents.
Independence outside of course does not preclude independence in other domains, that's a strange comment - what does health and finance have to do with being able to cross the road safely.

Anyway, I guess UK really is a different world.

Really small figures but the risk to my children of both of those will be absolutely zero because I'll be there to keep them safe

If that was true, that being with an adult meant zero risk, then no adults would ever get knocked down.

@lyralala, that's a lovely story! Good on you!