Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Strange occurrence in supermarket

59 replies

sprot · 17/03/2019 17:33

First time posting here so please be gentle with me.
Last week I was in my local supermarket,I lean on my trolley as I am disabled,anyway minding my own business when I feel prodding on my backside thinking someone had knocked me I ignored it and it carried on I turn round to see a elderly lady and her friend poking me with her umbrella,when I looked she said “sorry couldn’t ignore the target”🤔.i said nothing but have thought to myself afterwards if she had been male or younger I would have given her a right mouthful,but instead was just speechless.
No she wasn’t ‘confused or had dementia just thought it was funny.
So would I have been unreasonable if I’d told her where to go

OP posts:
Original poster
sprot · 17/03/2019 18:53

MyWeaponofChoiceisWords
Makes sense now

OP posts:
ShowMeTheKittens · 17/03/2019 18:55

It's actually assault and I think I would have told her so, also mentioning you are disabled.

FookMeFookYou · 17/03/2019 18:57

I would have knocked her dentures out cheeky bitch 🤬

TinklyLittleLaugh · 17/03/2019 18:58

Are you of ample proportions OP? I know quite a few elderly people who are shockingly fatist.

Twillow · 17/03/2019 19:02

You didn't say if it hurt so i'm presuming not. I may be the only person who thinks it was actually quite good-humoured though.

Flowersintheatticconversion · 17/03/2019 19:19

I would have said wtf do you think you are doing so you wouldn’t have bu to tell her where to go but yabu to let it still bother you a week later

QuirkyQuark · 17/03/2019 19:21

Boundaries Twillow boundaries!

MirandaGoshawk · 17/03/2019 19:21

A weird thing to do to someone. Overstepping the line of what is acceptable, and rather unkind, IMO. Presumably one of them was showing off to her friend. They wouldn't like it if done to them. But best to ignore it, OP - shit thing to happen but not the end of the world. Have some flowers :) Flowers

SheWoreBlueVelvet · 17/03/2019 19:22

Of course it’s a bit rude. However what she really wanted to say was “get your huge arse ( tell us it wasn’t see through leggings) is embarrassing everyone, get it out of our faces.
I’m guessing she just thought you were being a bit slovenly rather than needing to rest because of disability.

clairemcnam · 17/03/2019 19:26

Why is anyone over the age of 60,who behaves in an odd/unpleasant manner, automatically assumed to be developing dementia?!
Because it is very common. In the same way that "badly behaved" child may be autistic and having a meltdown.

Bahhhhhumbug · 17/03/2019 19:32

Ah l see you've met my Mil. She is terribly fattist, from a generation possibly where 'keeping your figure' was like a badge of honour
She regularly prods DB and dbil (both quite big lads) in the stomach and says things like 'Ooh when's it due' followed by witchy twinkly laugh.
Ironically she is very big herself these days.

Bahhhhhumbug · 17/03/2019 19:32

tinkly not twinkly

AriadnePersephoneCloud · 17/03/2019 19:34

Sounds like dementia to me to be honest. My lovely Nan has done some very strange things since it's developed, she's pinched me, slapped my auntie, thrown water at me, told the Doctor he's too bald... Is almost sounds funny but it isn't. She was the kindest person in the world after my grandad and now she's quite mean at times. You did the right thing ignoring it. It may just be that these women are dreadful people but just in case...

AriadnePersephoneCloud · 17/03/2019 19:37

Oops sorry missed the bit where you said she has no underlying issues. In that case my advice would be to try and take the high road but in reality I'd have probably told her to fuck off. Not great with the high ground myself 😁

clairemcnam · 17/03/2019 19:39

How would the shop assistant know she has no underlying issues?
I can see the early signs of dementia in my dad. Both he and my mum refuse to consider it.

Yes she may just be a horrible old woman. But no you do not know if that is the case.

PQ77 · 17/03/2019 19:43

This is the sort of thing my grandmother would do. No she doesn’t have dementia. She’s just rude and has been for the last 20 years or so. And for the poster who mentioned about older people being “fattist” that would be my grandmother too. Last time I visited her with my sons and took her to a cafe she was all “LOOK AT THE FAT MAN CHILDREN, ISN’T HE ENORMOUS”. Never have a wished more for a sink hole to open up and swallow me.

CanuckBC · 17/03/2019 19:45

I also lean on the shopping cart due to disability. If someone had done that to me I would see red! Not appropriate at all! No matter the age of the person! It would also hurt me due to fibromyalgia and issues with my gluteus maximus muscles! I would not be happy🤯

UtterlyDesperate · 17/03/2019 19:47

@Gronky GrinGrinGrin

CSIblonde · 17/03/2019 19:54

That sounds like the old lady in my village. Tho she's permanently angry & hits anyone in reach with her stick for just being there. Her lovely son always apologises but it's wearing thin for a lot of people whose pets or children she's scared (it's not dementia, she just loathes everyone, I'd be tempted to get her on anti depressants, but she's 94).

GreenShadow · 17/03/2019 19:58

I must admit I'd probably think it mildly funny if someone did it gently to me.
Wouldn't do it to anyone else myself of course, and also wouldn't want to see them do it to anyone else, but would sort of admire their cheek.

AnneOfCleanTables · 17/03/2019 20:02

I'd have laughed and moved out of their way. But I've spent a lot of time with elderly people so it wouldn't seem that unusual to me.

BIWI · 17/03/2019 20:08

Fuck me. More ageism than I can shake a walking stick on this thread.

And why is it that first time posters always ask us to be 'gentle' with them? Especially when they post shit like this?

SocksInPeril · 17/03/2019 20:12

Twillow

I agree, and I can be good humoured about these types of things. How about you prod me with your umbrella and make a joke about my body, and I’ll follow you around for the rest of my supermarket visit and assault prod you with some implement whilst making a few jokes about your appearance. Hilarious!

onthenaughtystepagain · 17/03/2019 20:13

I was once in a smart department store bending down looking at some very expensive plates when I felt someone push me then grab me as I started to topple over. I was on the point of landing a punch when I realised that it was my brother!

hellymart · 17/03/2019 20:16

She probably just has a weird sense of humour and thought it was funny. Expect she'd have been mortified if she'd realised you were actually disabled and therefore needed to lean on your trolley. I would probably have been cross too, depending on what mood I was in! Maybe just put it down to experience...(people are strange!)